do we have a chance

[stepmom74]

My husband resides in ND and has a 10 year old daughter.  She has been in counseling for depression and has terrible grades in school.  The school had told my husband and his ex that their daughter has emotional problems also--not to mention ADD, which me and my husband diagnosed.

This summer she has decided she doesn't want to come to our house anymore and has missed about 3 of her scheduled visitations and summer visitation.  Her mother told us today that she is not going to make her child come if she doesn't want to.  There is no reason why she won't come but has told her mother she has a problem with me.  We think the child is going through PAS.  

Emotionally, we think it would be best for his daughter to be with us.  She seems to be getting worse every year she is with her mother.  

1.  Do we have any chance in getting a change in custody?
2.  How do we get a therapist to consider PAS?
3.  What can we file besides contempt of court?

Stepmom74

[socrateaser]

>1.  Do we have any chance in getting a change in custody?

Not unless a therapist determines that the child's current home environment is the cause of her depression.

>2.  How do we get a therapist to consider PAS?

You haven't alleged any specific facts that would lead anyone to conclude that PAS is a factor. What is the mother doing to cause the child to alienate herself from you? The child's therapist must have some opinion about the existing circumstances. You need to discuss it with him/her.

>3.  What can we file besides contempt of court?

On your facts, nothing. If you believe that the mother is the reason why the child will not visit, then you need some proof. At this point, the child doesn't want to come visit, and that's not contempt.

[janM]

According to everything I've read on this site, it is up to the CP to make the child go on visits. It is not up to the child. If the court orders visitation, then it has to happen. If it doesn't, CP is in contempt.

[socrateaser]

Contempt is the willful and knowing violation of a court order. Here, the custodial parent clearly knows of the order, because she has told the NCP that she will not send the child if the child doesn't want to visit. The question, then, is whether the mother has, made reasonable attempts to get the child to visit, and exactly what kind of response this has generated from the child. If the child physically resists visitation, then the parent can say that she is not "willfully" disobeying the court order.

Now, short of dragging the child into court and asking her if she is physically resisting visitation, how do you propose to prove the mother's willful violation. Answer is: you can't. The judge just ain't gonna punish the mother without clear evidence that she is willfully disobeying.

The poster's statements do not give enough credible evidence for me to find a contempt, so I am advising against trying without better evidence.

Ya gotta pick your battles.

[janM]

According to everything I've read on this site, it is up to the CP to make the child go on visits. It is not up to the child. If the court orders visitation, then it has to happen. If it doesn't, CP is in contempt.

[socrateaser]

Contempt is the willful and knowing violation of a court order. Here, the custodial parent clearly knows of the order, because she has told the NCP that she will not send the child if the child doesn't want to visit. The question, then, is whether the mother has, made reasonable attempts to get the child to visit, and exactly what kind of response this has generated from the child. If the child physically resists visitation, then the parent can say that she is not "willfully" disobeying the court order.

Now, short of dragging the child into court and asking her if she is physically resisting visitation, how do you propose to prove the mother's willful violation. Answer is: you can't. The judge just ain't gonna punish the mother without clear evidence that she is willfully disobeying.

The poster's statements do not give enough credible evidence for me to find a contempt, so I am advising against trying without better evidence.

Ya gotta pick your battles.