Now What - 5 Years and a big surprise today.

[Peaceful in NJ]

I'm new here, so I 'll try to be brief...My wife filed for divorce in Oct 1999 in NJ. I hired a lawyer, went to mediation, spent a good deal of money. Then everything came to a halt in Summer of 2002. The wife is a vicious, nasty person who has dis-owned her our son because he maintains a relationship with me.
My lawyer calls me about 2 months ago to ask how I would like to proceed because he had not heard from the court re this 4+yr old case. He says I could 1) do nothing or 2) he would check with the court as to why this case has not been called.
Today, I decided to call the court clerk myself and was shocked to learn that the original suit was dismissed in June of 2000! Neither myself nor my lawyer were aware of this.
I don't know what to do at this point, except to get another attorney. I expect I will file for divorce, but am not sure how to proceed.
Both our children are grown, we have no assets as everything has been sold. The only thing left is our individual savings, 401ks, etc. I don't even know where she lives.
Are all of my accumulated assest vunerable at this point?
Sorry for the vent, but I am desparate for some advice.

[socrateaser]

Court will generally not order you to distribute assets separately acquired after physical separation from your spouse, unless you engaged in some inequitable (unfair) action that caused her to go into hiding. Having said this, be advised that NJ has, in my opinion, the most backward domestic relations laws of any jurisdiction in the U.S., so, your ex-spouse will almost certainly be given every possible inference of being oppressed by you, just like she were still living in the time before women had the right to vote.

If you want to get your divorce now, you must file a new petition, then make a diligent effort to locate your ex and personally serve her with the petition, and then ask the court to decree your divorce and order that each party is awarded all of the property that they each possess at the time of judgment, and that no spousal support shall be awarded.

If your spouse is bad financial shape and she is not remarried, then, watch out, because you could still get hit with a spousal support award.

And, if I were you, and I was gonna go through with all this, I would move out of NJ for six months, and then file in your new state of residence -- which if you REALLY wanted the best possible deal, would be TX, because TX is the only State in the U.S. where courts are prohibited from awarding permanent spousal support.

However, if your spouse is still living in NJ, and you serve her and she appears and asks the TX court to treat her as if she lives in NJ for the purposes of spousal support, the TX may do this, because she never moved. But, the TX may not, because she's had plenty of time to file against you in NJ, and she never did.

Pretty complicated, huh? I love the law!

[Peaceful in NJ]

thanks for you input...how about Arizona...ther is a chance I will be moving there. Would the same thing hold as you described for TX?
TIA

[socrateaser]

>thanks for you input...how about Arizona...ther is a chance I
>will be moving there. Would the same thing hold as you
>described for TX?

Yes, except for spousal support, which AZ awards.