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Ex reported us to social services..Options?

Started by smtotwo, Oct 09, 2004, 09:08:04 AM

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smtotwo

Dh and  I have eow standard visits with his 2 boys 8 and 10.  The middle of september the ex moved for the 5th time in 4 years.

The last 3 visits with the boys, they have been caught stealing from my sons room and the 10 yr old was caught on the computer visiting playboy.com.

2 weeks ago the 8 yr old snapped the neck of one of our cats kittens.  He insisted it was an accident and it may have been, but then last weekend I caught him with another kitten, had ot trapped under a box and was laying on the box crushing it.  Up until then I did beleive it had been an accident, now I have my doubts.

As punishment the boys were grounded off the computer and are no longer allowed into my sons room at all.

On wednesday the ex went to ss's school with a story that my son had written, mafia/murder/justice kind of story.  10 yr old stepson stole ot off my sons computer after he was grounded from the room.

School reported that the ex felt my son was a danger to stepsons.  By thursday afternoon social services had decided that there was no concern it was just a story.

However, after they reported to social services the stepsons school then faxed the report they made to social services and a copy of the story to my sons school, and requested that my sons school have the school psychologist deal with my son.

1) what kind of legal authority did the stepsons school have on contacting my sons school?

My son has cerebral palsy and is highly emotional.  He was VERY distressed, and embarrassed when the school psychologist pulled him out of class. He was crying uncontrollable in the psych's office.

2) Once the report was made to social services shouoldn't the other schools part been done?  
3) Can we file something against the ex or the school for violating sons privacy that way?

We're in wisconsin and are looking at filing for full custody before the boys get any worse.

Sorry its soo long I'm very upset that she used my son in her game.

socrateaser

>1) what kind of legal authority did the stepsons school have
>on contacting my sons school?

Generally, the school must report possible incidents of abuse. Depends on the law of the jurisdiction involved.

>2) Once the report was made to social services shouoldn't the
>other schools part been done?  

I don't know the law of the jursidiction involved.


>3) Can we file something against the ex or the school for
>violating sons privacy that way?

I don't know. You can sue for invasion of privacy and infliction of emotional distress, however, you must first find out if the school acted beyond its legal authority, and from your facts, I'm not certain that this is the case.

It's possible that the school overstepped its authority by reporting to the other school, but I really don't know WI law.

InTheMiddle

I am an adult with cerebral palsy, so I know what your son lives with everyday.  The Step Kids's Birth Mother (BM) sounds like a very manipulative person.  

She sees your son's condition as a weakness she can and will attack every chance she gets.  Too bad she isn't educated enough to know that cerebral palsy doesn't affect intelligence, but your son's school and their psychologist do know better!!!

Does your son have an IEP?  Having an IEP gives your son extra protection against predators like your BM in school situations.

Contact the principal and CC the district superintendent that as an involved parent, you must be notified before your son is pulled into the psychologist's office for any reason!  If the school had called you first about the situation, you could have better prepared your son for this emotional confrontation.  I find sending e-mails works better than calling, it leaves a paper trail they must respond to.

I would contact your local UCP and disability rights advocacy group and discuss the situation with them as well.

While I applaud your nobility in trying to get custody of your step sons so you can help them, I am concerned that you didn't mention if they we already in counseling.  You can find family therapists that are open on Saturdays and since you have them eow, it would be in your family's best interest that counseling start before the emotional court battle.

Sounds like this is a situation you will be dealing with the rest of your life.  Read up on books about cognitive thinking and give your son the intellectual tools he needs to deal with situations in the future.

My positive thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

smtotwo

on the general issues board so as not to start a thread here.