What exactly is joint custody?

[indisbelief]

I have legal joint custody with BM having residential custody. We are supposed to make joint decisions regarding as far as I am concerned most everything. The agreement states specifically,

"The parties shall confer with each other and shall make joint decisions about all important matters pertaining to the child's upbringing...to the extent that the parties cannot agree, the issue shall be submitted to mediation"

In practice however, BM refuses to communicate at all. Virtually zero. She does not respond to e-mails and does not respond to certified letters. She will only try and talk through my daughter (a ten year old) which I refuse to do--or accept as communication. The major concern is her failure to communicate regarding medical treatment. Daughter was in a serious car accident and BM refuses to give any info on prognosis, diagnosis etc. I have to write to the doctors myself to get the info, once I find out that she went to the doctor months later through my medical insurance payment stub I get back.  In addition to a list of visitation violations, can her lack of communication and refusal to treat me as a parent on any level be grounds for a change in custody? If not, what is joint custody? What advice do you have for me to get moving on this. I have certified letters going back a year requesting info. I even carbon copy her lawyer.

 

[socrateaser]

>I have legal joint custody with BM having residential
>custody. We are supposed to make joint decisions regarding as
>far as I am concerned most everything. The agreement states
>specifically,
>
>"The parties shall confer with each other and shall make joint
>decisions about all important matters pertaining to the
>child's upbringing...to the extent that the parties cannot
>agree, the issue shall be submitted to mediation"
>
>In practice however, BM refuses to communicate at all.
>Virtually zero. She does not respond to e-mails and does not
>respond to certified letters. She will only try and talk
>through my daughter (a ten year old) which I refuse to do--or
>accept as communication. The major concern is her failure to
>communicate regarding medical treatment. Daughter was in a
>serious car accident and BM refuses to give any info on
>prognosis, diagnosis etc. I have to write to the doctors
>myself to get the info, once I find out that she went to the
>doctor months later through my medical insurance payment stub
>I get back.  In addition to a list of visitation violations,
>can her lack of communication and refusal to treat me as a
>parent on any level be grounds for a change in custody? If
>not, what is joint custody? What advice do you have for me to
>get moving on this. I have certified letters going back a year
>requesting info. I even carbon copy her lawyer.

You have the right to file a motion for contempt if the other parent is in violation of the court orders. This may lead to a new custody hearing if the violations are severe enough, or if the other parent refuses to abide by the remedy ordered by the court, assuming you prove the contempt.

Joint custody is the right of both parents to make decisions as to the health, education and welfare of the minor child(ren). Absent a court order to the contrary, joint custody permits both parents to independently make such decisions, however, your court order forces you both to cooperate, so if you are not getting that cooperation, then file for contempt.