Paternity

[g_staiger]

My SIL and her husband are getting a divorce.  They lived in Missouri and BF has moved back to Illinois with his parents.  The order is from a Missouri court.  They have an 11 month old baby together, except the BF believes he isn't the biological father.  

They married after she was pregnant and he told her if the baby isn't his it didn't matter.  Well, their marriage didn't even last a year.  BM even told BF that the guy she was with right before him took a paternity test and proved he wasn't the father.  I know this is not true.  She lives with my MIL and my MIL would have told my husband this.  

BF was supposed to start paying $300 in child support in March, but just now got a job.  He received the order to pay in Feb.  He hasn't responded to it either.  He said his wife gave a false income amount, saying he makes $1600 a month when he only makes around $1000.

He also wants a paternity test done, but doesn't have the money to pay for it.  He can't afford an attorney either.

They also don't have any kind of parenting agreement in place.  The only thing they have is the order for child support.  The BM won't allow BF to see the baby unless she is there when he sees him and they don't get along at all.  

I believe and so does he that the BM is very unfit and does not have this childs best interest at heart.  I believe an evaluation or something would show that.  The BM is making lots of false claims about abuse.  I know she is lying and anyone that talks to her can figure out she is not okay in the head.

1.  What should he do?

2.  Does he have to have an attorney?

3.  Do you know what forms he may need to fill out and send to the court house if any?

4.  If the child is not his, can the BM be ordered to pay for the cost of the paternity test?

5.  If the child is his what is the next step?
a. submit a parenting agreement?
b. request an evaluation?

6. Any other suggestions?

Thanks!

[socrateaser]

>1.  What should he do?

If the divorce is pending, then as part of the divorce petition, there is a section claiming that the child is from the parties' marriage. If you do not file a motion to contest paternity before the divorce is final, you will be legally adjudged the child's father, and after that, you will never be permitted to challenge it again.
>
>2.  Does he have to have an attorney?

No, but under the circumstances, it would be absolute idiocy not to have one, at least to deal with the paternity issue. If you are found to not be the child's father, then you will save yourself hundreds of thousands of dollars in child support over the next 21 years, so don't be a fool, and HIRE A LAWYER!

>3.  Do you know what forms he may need to fill out and send to
>the court house if any?

Different forms for every jurisdiction. I don't know MO civil procedure, so I cannot help without researching and I don't have time at the moment.

>
>4.  If the child is not his, can the BM be ordered to pay for
>the cost of the paternity test?

If the child is found to be not yours, then you can have the real father joined to the dissolution and he and the mother will have to share the cost of the paternity test. But, at the moment, you will have to come up with the money, and then seek reimbursement later.

>5.  If the child is his what is the next step?

File a motion to establish child custody/parenting time, and support.

>a. submit a parenting agreement?

yes.

>b. request an evaluation?

Yes, unless you can come to a negotiated settlement.

>
>6. Any other suggestions?

Tighten your seat belt, because if the child is yours, then it's gonna be a long expensive ride. Seriously, though, get an attorney to deal with the paternity issues. I can tell from your questions that you are overmatched and you're gonna get creamed.

[g_staiger]

1.  Should he look for an attorney in Missouri close to where the order was made? Will that save money?

2.  What kind of attorney does he need? Just your average attorney or one that specializes in family law?

[socrateaser]

>1.  Should he look for an attorney in Missouri close to where
>the order was made? Will that save money?

Now I'm confused. What legal papers have been served on you or your employer, and from what State court(s) were these papers issued?

>
>2.  What kind of attorney does he need? Just your average
>attorney or one that specializes in family law?

Family law.

[g_staiger]

>Now I'm confused. What legal papers have been served on you or
>your employer, and from what State court(s) were these papers
>issued.


BF is in Illinois.  BM is in Missouri.  The both lived in Missouri together.  She filed for the support in Missouri.  

BF has only received papers stating the amount he needs to pay in child support.  BM is pregnant right now with someone elses baby (due in August) and can't get the divorce until after the baby is born.  BM (who is my SIL) told me a few weeks ago that she will have to prove this baby isn't her husbands before they can divorce and also that legal aid isn't returning her calls.

I am trying to help the BF because the BM is spreading lies and telling the BF lies.  She told him the other guy who could be the father had a paternity test done and he isn't the father and I know that is a lie.  BM is also abusive to their son and I have hotlined her for smacking the babies mouth.

[socrateaser]

OK, well you will need an Missouri attorney, and you should challenge paternity. Frankly, you should have never left Missouri without dealing with this first, because it makes you look like you've abandoned your family. If it turns out that the child is actually yours, and you want to be treated reasonably in the divorce, then I strongly suggest that you move back to the county where the mother and child currently reside.

If, the child turns out not to be yours, then you will have dodged a rather huge bullet, but your spouse could still request and receive some amount of spousal support, so you're not necessarily out of the woods.

[g_staiger]

BF moved back to Illinois with his parents, he has no family in Missouri.  The reason he got out of town is because BM was harassing him and spreading rumors about him and trying to turn his friends against him.  

Thanks for your time and your advice.  :)