My daughter is in Indiana and I am in Kansas

[sarasdaddy282000]

Hi,
It has been quite awhile since I have posted in SPARC.

My daughter is now 6 yrs old and the last time I was with her was October 17th 2001.

Her BM (biological mother) and I never married and never went to court to decide custody or child support. The BM has been moving and staying out of touch hoping I will simply, "move on" (her words). The closest thing to contact I have had is catching her (the BM) in a Yahoo Chat room, which aires all your "dirty laundry" for many strangers to hear. When I try to call her on the phone, she never answers or simply hangs up. Now, apparently she has been living with a man for almost 3 yrs and they claim that he adopted my daughter. I have been making every effort to get and stay in touch with my daughter to no avail. I am not rich, I barely get by on what I make, living paycheck to paycheck. Am I doomed to never seeing my daughter again?
Do I finally simply give up, let them have Sara, and move on with my life?
If they are not lying to me, I know their address and phone number in Gary Indiana. This has been an ongoing nightmare since the day I left Michigan, where we lived at the time. I currently live in Wichita Kansas, that's several hundred miles away. My daughter's BM holds all the cards. All I have is a Paternity Affidavit from Ohio where our daughter was born, I was listed on our daughters birth certificate, which I have a copy of, and I have a copy of her Social Security Card, with her name on it, with my last name. Am I doomed or is there still some hope? Thank you for listening.

[socrateaser]

.

[4honor]

My daughter is in Indiana and I am in Kansas

My daughter is now 6 yrs old and the last time I was with her was October 17th 2001.

Her BM (biological mother) and I never married and never went to court to decide custody or child support.  I have offered support in the past and it has been returned to me "refused".

The BM has been moving and staying out of touch hoping I will simply, "move on" (her words). The closest thing to contact I have had is catching BM in a Yahoo Chat room.

When I try to call her on the phone, she either fails to answer or simply hangs up.

Now, apparently she has been living with a man for almost 3 yrs and they claim that he adopted my daughter.

I have been making every effort to get and stay in touch with my daughter, to no avail. I am not rich, I barely get by on what I make, living paycheck to paycheck, so resources are possibly too limited to hire a PI.

If they are not lying to me, I know their address and phone number in Gary Indiana. This has been an ongoing nightmare since the day I left Michigan, where we lived at the time. I currently live in Wichita Kansas, that's several hundred miles away.

My daughter's BM holds all the cards. All I have is a Paternity Affidavit from Ohio where our daughter was born, I was listed on our daughters birth certificate, which I have a copy of, and I have a copy of her Social Security Card, with her name on it, with my last name.

1.  What steps legally can I take to determine the truth regarding the alleged adoption?
2.  If there has been an adoption (for which I never received notification) is there any legal loop hole to set it aside?
3.  If I were to come to you as a client, what would you counsel me to do as the best option for myself and my daughter under the circumstances?

 Thank you for your help.

[socrateaser]

>1.  What steps legally can I take to determine the truth
>regarding the alleged adoption?

File a petition to establish paternity, custody and support in the State where the child currently resides. Then it will be up to the other parent to show that the child was legally adopted by someone else -- which is possible.

>2.  If there has been an adoption (for which I never received
>notification) is there any legal loop hole to set it aside?

Perhaps, but, frankly, you'd have to be out of your mind to do so. If you successfully set the adoption aside, you may be saddled with a huge bill for child support arrears that will bury you for the rest of your life.

>3.  If I were to come to you as a client, what would you
>counsel me to do as the best option for myself and my daughter
>under the circumstances?

Well, I would write a letter to the other parent, simply stating that you were not interested in contesting the adoption, if it has occurred, but that you would like to see a copy of the court judgment so that you could be certain that it had, in order to protect your legal rights, and that if she doesn't provide a certified copy without 15 days, that you will file a petition for paternity, custody and support, in order to obtain the information requested.

I would also mention that if the child ever wants to get in touch with you, that you would be very interested in knowing her.

This is probably not the advice that you wanted to hear, but it's what I think is right under the circumstances.