Worried about situation

[justgettalong]

I have custody and my children go with their father EOW, plus some agreed upon extra time. The children are also in counseling to try to deal with the divorce. After last visit, my 10 year old was upset and wanted to get in with the counselor to talk about issues that were bothering him.

He went in and told the counselor about his dad's "discipline" and how it humiliated him and hurt him (Dad grabs and twists ear and threatens with "beating his ass") and he needed help dealing with it.

I have felt that my ex would benefit from parenting class for a while(he never took one after the divorce)  and the kids have said they are afraid to tell him how they feel because they fear his reaction. I am sure he is probably lashing out at them verbally with threats of physical harm (they talk about his threats) when they are trying his patience. I usually always tried to handle discipline during the marriage since he has such a temper.

here is the problem. The counselor has told me he had to file a police report. He says he has no choice. While I do think my ex needs to develop skills with parenting, he is important in the kids lives and I don't want him to think that I am trying to create problems for him or eliminate him from their lives. I had no idea this would wind up where it is, and I, in fact, didn't know that son was going to tell the counselor about that incident.

I am wondering where a police report will likely lead, and I fear that this will only make my ex threaten the kids worse with keeping quiet about things, perhaps at some point making them not tell me something that is truly serious.

[socrateaser]

>I am wondering where a police report will likely lead, and I
>fear that this will only make my ex threaten the kids worse
>with keeping quiet about things, perhaps at some point making
>them not tell me something that is truly serious.

Please number your questions in the future. A "?" would be good, too, so I can find the questions.

The police report will lead to an investigation from Child Protective Services (or whatever agency is responsible in your State for possible domestic violence/child abuse incidents).

CPS will contact the other parent and you and ask questions, and if they think that the other parent has committed a crime, then , they will report to the District Attorney who will decide whether or not to file criminal charges.