Seperated Dad, Wife moves away with kids, Live in Girlfriend

[Kaeli]

Help!

I know it's mostly men who post here but we've just found out that my living with my seperated boyfriend has pretty much caused him to have no rights to get his kids back! Before we made this decision he checked with someone (I don't know who) to make sure this wouldn't happen and was reassured it wouldn't have an impact. We live in NC and wife just moved to GA. Has anyone gone through this or can anyone give any ideas or insight?

I hate seeing him without his kids and hate I'm part of the reason he can do nothing, though he's not blaming me. Any experiences or ideas would be appreciated.

[VeronicaGia]

One has to be really careful in some of the southern states.  Some of them frown heavily on cohabitation.

So what you haven't told us:

1.  Is there a custody order?

2.  Is there a child support order?

3.  Was he married at the time of birth thereby establishing paternity?

4.  If not, did he ask for a court ordered DNA test?

5.  Did he ask the judge to restrict her to the state of NC?

In other words, what did he do to try to get his rights in writing by a judge and what happened?

[Kaeli]

There has been no legal order or agreement up until this point.

Yes they were married at the time of the birth of both of the kids

Since there was no legal order involved no he did not ask the judge to restrict her to any location.

She moved down there to be closer to a man she is seeing though to my knowladge she isn't living with him.

He said he checked with someone before I moved in with him but i'm guessing it wasn't a lawyer

[rm1759]

It would have some impact, but I don't see how it could be significant.  I was living with my girlfriend (now wife) when I went through my custody battle, and while we never went to court (settled in mediation) the fact that she was there never entered into the discussion (I live in Florida).  What your boyfriend needs to do is file for custody.  There is a statute of limitations on this (to keep jurisdiction in your area), so depending on how long ago she moved he may be out of luck.  Try posting this on the Custody Issues board, you might get more response there.  

And one more word of advice - make sure he gets an attorney now...

[msme]

Make sure that the attorney is a Board Certified Family Law & Custody Specialist. Also, if it has been more than 6 months since she moved, he will need the lawyer to be licensed in GA. DO NOT HIRE ONE FROM THE TOWN SHE IS IN, UNLESS SHE IS IN A MAJOR CITY. He doesn't need to get one of "the good old boys."

Good luck & God bless.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression!