Follow up questions

[backwardsbike]

Hi Soc,

I had posted seveal weeks ago.  I was in court on 2/2/06 for what was supposed to be a custody modification.  In the end we never had the hearing as the judge spoke with the children in chanmbers adn decided to keep custody and the order the same EXCEP he wanted the parents to attend counsleing in the hopes that it would help the do a better job of making joint decisons.  All parties are in PA.

In my last post I had asked advice becasue when the order arrived it was substantially different from our original order adnd "took away" all of my time that I have now excet for every other weekend.  In court and on record the judge did say that the order was ro remain the same except for the counsleing.  You told me it would not be out of line for an amended order to take 30 days.

I called my attorney weekly as she had told me she was contacting the other attorney.  He never responded and the week before last I got a call from my attorney telling me the judge had asked her to "write something up and I'll sign it".  She now claims it is "on her desk and she'll get to it when she can".  It has been six weeks since we were in court.

The other party also never responded about the counsleor we suggested.  No counseling has yet to take place.  They just never responded.  Nor did they put forth any names of counselors they were willing to see.

 My X was vigourously opposed to the counseling.  So much so that the judge told his attorney to " take your client out into the hall for five minutes, he looks like someone hit him in the head with a brick.".

Questions:

1. Is it unreasonable for me to push the issue of the counseling?

2. What are the legal remedies, if any,  to move the counseling forward?

3.  Is there any way the as yet un corrected court order can hurt me?  

[socrateaser]

>Questions:
>
>1. Is it unreasonable for me to push the issue of the
>counseling?

No, but it's obviously a waste of time, and I would be seeking a waiver of counseling on grounds that the other party refuses to cooperate.

>
>2. What are the legal remedies, if any,  to move the
>counseling forward?

You can't force someone to cooperate. You can ask for contempt sanctions, but at the end of the road, you'll be in a session with a therapist who will be unable to resolve anything. This is a waste of time.

You want your attorney to obtain specific orders granting you parenting time, and then you want to absolutely follow those orders so as to demonstrate that you are interested in as much time as you can get. Then if the other parent violates the orders, you move immediately for contempt.

And, you need to make certain that you have evidence that you tried to exercise parenting and that the other parent failed to cooperate, either by being accompanied by a third party witness, or by having the exchange point be at a location where some government or other disinterested party can verify that you were available, and the child was not.

>3.  Is there any way the as yet un corrected court order can
>hurt me?  

Yes, the status quo of you being totally absent from your child's life is being created. Your attorney is violating her duty of diligence on your behalf, if she is actually telling you that she will get to your case when she can. You should write her a letter stating that she either get to your case immediately, or ask the court to withdraw because she is unable to handle her current workload, and that if she cannot, that you will be forced to lodge a complaint with the state disciplinary authority.

You do NOT threaten to discharge her, because that would let her off the hook.

Once again, I'm assuming that you are faithfully reproducing her statements, and that she didn't tell you that she would get to your order in a more timely fashion.

[backwardsbike]

SOc,

At this time the other party is following the old court order.  He has allowed me my Spring Break with the children.  That was not stated in the order we are trying to amend.

The counsleing was to address the issue we have with the other party being totally inflexible.  He will not allow me one more second of parenting time than the CO states and he willnever allow make up time becasue the court order doesn't say he has to.

Every Summer X makes vacation plans on my custody time then expects me to give up the time without getting any compensatory time with the children.  We  go to court each and ever spring over the Summer schedule!

X will not communicate with me at all.  he will not attempt to resolve any issues and has kept medical info from me ( we have joint legal).  he also alienates school personnel form me.  It is a constant battle to continue to be involved in the children's live.

In my opinion the judge wanted to be let off the hook by getting X to agree to do these things without the judge ordering it.   My onlyhope of any more time with my children is to have the counseling work a miracle.