3 more questions (and an update on previous one)

[angel]

Case set in Ohio, 2003

Both I and BM still reside there.  We have joint custody (I have physical custody during school months--but BM cancels often, so its more than that).

Papers say "During the school term when the child resides primarily with Father, Mother shall have compansionship time with the child the first 3 wknds of each month from 7PM Friday-7PM Sunday" and then...

"During school vacation periods when the child resides primarily with Mother, Father shall have companionship time with the child the first three wknds of each month" (then it again lists the same time).

[September is one of a few months each yr that has 5 wknds in it.  (BM canceled wknd 1 and 3 of this month, and has stated that she will get son next week instead, which is the 4th wknd).]

[BM only gets son 2-3 weeks during the whole summer vacation, and has done so for 3 summers now.  She just decides when she will, and when she will not have him, so son "resides" with me all year long as far as Im concerned.]

BM doesnt let me (or son) know whether shes getting him or not until approx. 40 mins to 1 hr before time to leave for 1/2 way point on her sched. wknds. (Takes an hour to get there) We are unable to make plans on what time to eat dinner, let alone whether we can make wknd plans.

I had made plans to go camping this coming 4th wknd, since the way I read the papers, the next 2 wknds are supposed to be mine with him.

As stated in my last post--BM is often late to 1/2 way point. Court refuses to change driving arranges. from meeting at 1/2 way point--I already tried that with them. Besides--BM tends to try to physically fight DW and scream and curse at her, so not really a good option

Questions are:

1.  During mos that have 5 weeks, do I have to make son avail. to BM that 4th wknd?  Given the way the papers read,  am I right in feeling that the 4th (as well as the 5th) wknd(s) are my time with him, and that it's not my fault she chose to cancel 2 of her 3 wknds?

2.  Do I still have to abide by what it says about the wknds during summer vacation? Or could I start making her go by what's listed during the rest of the year since son resides with me me all year? (or get papers modified)?

3.  Can anything be done to make BM let son or I know at least 24 hrs ahead of sched. time to leave whether shes canceling (or not)?

4. Same q again--given how often BM is late--do I HAVE to wait a full 1/2 hr on her?

Thanks much once again for your time Socrateaser.

[socrateaser]

>Questions are:
>
>1.  During mos that have 5 weeks, do I have to make son avail.
>to BM that 4th wknd?  Given the way the papers read,  am I
>right in feeling that the 4th (as well as the 5th) wknd(s) are
>my time with him, and that it's not my fault she chose to
>cancel 2 of her 3 wknds?

4th and 5th weekend are yours.

>
>2.  Do I still have to abide by what it says about the wknds
>during summer vacation? Or could I start making her go by
>what's listed during the rest of the year since son resides
>with me me all year? (or get papers modified)?

You must follow the orders, not make up new ones yourself.

>
>3.  Can anything be done to make BM let son or I know at least
>24 hrs ahead of sched. time to leave whether shes canceling
>(or not)?

You can ask the court to make an express order regarding this issue, on grounds that the other parent changes the time at her whim. I think the court would provide a favorable order to resolve this issue.


>
>4. Same q again--given how often BM is late--do I HAVE to wait
>a full 1/2 hr on her?

I don't know where you have obtained this 1/2 hour time limit, but if it's not in your orders, then there's no such thing. You have to wait a reasonable length of time. If based on your experience, the other parent's failure to arrive within 15 minutes of the time for transfer, means that she will not show up at all, then 15 minutes is reasonable.

Just be sure to back it up with some proof of the time when she arrives or doesn't. You could also write the other parent and notify her that you will presume that if she is more than 15 minutes late that she will not be arriving, and if she doesn't like it, then she can ask the court for a diffierent order.