Drug use in CP home

[Crockpot]

We are all in Minnesota.  I'm am NCP.  My ex has custody of our two daughters, both under eight.  We share legal.  We have been divorced for three years.

During our marriage she smoked pot occasionally.  Her usage increased throughout our marriage.  I made the mistake of letting her have physical custody when we separated.  

I have a recording of her admitting she had gotten her dog high in February (when the recording was made).  My understanding of MN law is I can legally record our conversations without her knowledge since I am party to the conversation.  

I also have an email from her admitting she smokes it and states "it's just weed, it's not like I'm a crack whore."  

I contacted the county she lives in and was told without a police report they can't investigate.  That doesn't seem correct to me.

After all this she told me she quit smoking.  I told my attorney these things and he advised that since she said she quit that there's not much I can do unless something else happens.  

While with my daughters this weekend my youngest made a comment that mommy "coughs in her bedroom."  My oldest confirmed this behavior.  Although I can't prove it, from experience I know the coughing is when she's getting high in her bedroom.  I suspected she was still doing it but didn't realize it was while the kids were with her.  

1. Is there anything I can do with what my daughters told me?  
2. Who do I report this behavior to, if anyone?
3. Can I request a drug test from her in court?  We may be in court soon on unrelated issues (holiday schedule).  

Thank you.

[socrateaser]

>1. Is there anything I can do with what my daughters told me?

You can file an emergency motion for a change in custody on grounds that the other parent is routinely using marijuana in the family home, and that this fact may cause the child irreparable harm from being exposed to the funes. You can submit your proof, and ask that the other parent be ordered to submit to a drug test -- one which you will ALSO AGREE to submit to -- just to keep things fair in the judges mind.

The court will look at your evidence, and if he/she believes that the comment that she has quit is less than credible, the judge may order the drug test. If your ex refuses, she will be in the soup.

I think your attorney's analysis is wrong, by the way, although I understand that he may not think you will be able to sway the judge to order a test, based on your evidence being too thin. I can't evaluate that, because I haven't actually reviewed the evidence myself, but based on what you're disclosing, I think you have plenty enough to get to the drug test.

>
>2. Who do I report this behavior to, if anyone?

Unnecessary.

>3. Can I request a drug test from her in court?  We may be in
>court soon on unrelated issues (holiday schedule).  

See $1 above.

PS. BE SURE YOU'RE RIGHT, because if you're not, and your ex's test comes up negative, you will lose all future credibility with the court, and your ability to coparent with your ex will be completely destroyed.

[Crockpot]

Thank you for the response.  Although I know she's using, I don't know how often so she may pass a test.

1.  By waiting for more concrete proof will the age of my email and recording proof be an issue (both are several months old now)?

2.  If I wait to file will the courts view it as I wasn't concerned enough to file sooner (I know you don't have a crystal ball)?

Thanks again.

[socrateaser]

>Thank you for the response.  Although I know she's using, I
>don't know how often so she may pass a test.
>
>1.  By waiting for more concrete proof will the age of my
>email and recording proof be an issue (both are several months
>old now)?

Evidence must generally be proximate in time, place, and occurrance to the element being proven. However, evidence of similar occurrances, injuries, agreements, etc., and especially evidence of habitual behavior (generally defined as automatic/reflexive) is relevant despite it's lack of proximity to the present case.

So, if you can show that smoking dope is habitual based upon past behavior and admissions, then you're probably ok. I think that the other parent's recorded admission is pretty damaging, when combined with prior emails, because it shows a pattern of behavior that is well known to be difficult to quit (that's why it's called "dope," lol).

>2.  If I wait to file will the courts view it as I wasn't
>concerned enough to file sooner (I know you don't have a
>crystal ball)?

Depends on whether you get some new evidence in the interim. Obviously, the farther away you get to any of your evidence, especially the recording, the weaker your case becomes.

How long ago was the recording made?

[Crockpot]

The recording was made in 2/06 and the email is from 3/06.  However, in the same email she says she quit two weeks prior.  So the only current evidence I have is my daughters statement about mommy coughing in her bedroom.  Because of her age (four) I know it's happened recently if she's bringing it up now.

1. When I file the motion will she know what it's about?  I'm concerned that she will find a way to 'mask' the drugs in her system.  

Thanks again!

[socrateaser]

>The recording was made in 2/06 and the email is from 3/06.
>However, in the same email she says she quit two weeks prior.
>So the only current evidence I have is my daughters statement
>about mommy coughing in her bedroom.  Because of her age
>(four) I know it's happened recently if she's bringing it up
>now.
>
>1. When I file the motion will she know what it's about?  I'm
>concerned that she will find a way to 'mask' the drugs in her
>system.  

That's quite a while, so you're definitely taking a risk if she comes up negative, because it will make you look vindictive, rather than concerned. The judge will definitely wonder why you waited so long to bring the issue up -- perhaps because you were trying to quit yourself and didn't think you could pass a stringent test yourself, until now.

I'm not saying that any of the above is true -- just that you have left yourself open to the argument that you are no more a fit parent than your opponent, which is really the only thing that could crush your chances.

You need some new evidence, in my opinion to support her continued habitual drug use.