Filing contempt

[Zephyr]

Hello Socrateaser!

All parties and order in WI.

Child is 4.5 years old, court order 50/50 legal/physical- week on, week off schedule, no cp indicated.

Hopefully I will be able to accurately detail the logistics so the situation is clear. I live in town A, Dad lives 18 miles to the west of me in a rural area, the closest town to Dad is 16 miles to his north and 26 miles northwest of my town.


Child has been going to childcare in the town north of Dad during his weeks, and to a daycare in my town during my weeks. Actually my daycare is as close to dad as the one he uses- but he just refuses anything in regards to me.

During the spring of this year Dad and I talked about putting child into 4 year old kindergarten, he wanted her in his district because it's "richer" and I wanted her in my district because, with the bus routes we can still maitain our every other week rotation. If she went to school in his district I  would have to be late to work every day and leave work 2 hours early every day- just not feasible. So we agreed to not enroll her and discuss the school issue over the next year.

Last week daughter said something to me about her "new big kids school",  so I called her daycare up in dad's town under the ruse of updating my contact info where they told me he had taken her out of that school over 4 weeks ago.

I tried many times to speak with him about this and he kept dodging. Finally he said he had put her in a 4k program at a parochial- lutheran (neither of us are lutheran). He also said he did not need to discuss this with me.

I believe that his intention is to create a staus quo situation so that when school does roll around he can say- she has been attending "this" district for a year already- change would be detrimental at this point. Which if the judge agreed would necessitate changing the periods of placement and minimize my time with our daughter.

So I filed for remedial contempt, relief sought being the court demanding he follow the order, clarification of the order, and a designation that when she does attend school it will be in my school district to protect the current time allocation in place. I did not ask for any change in actual time, or legal or physical custody status.

Questions:

1. Was this the right approach in your opinion? Would it have been more effective to just go for primary placement right away?

2. With the current placement schedule having been in place for almost 2 years now, is it likely the court would want to preserve that status quo as I have requested?

3. What am a missing? Is there a big facet of this that I have overlooked or should pay closer attention to?

Thank you so much for all of your help.

[socrateaser]

>Questions:
>
>1. Was this the right approach in your opinion? Would it have
>been more effective to just go for primary placement right
>away?

Clarification of the educational orders -- yes, but not contempt -- there's no facts to support a contempt. You may want to move for primary placement, but now that Dad has already started the ball, you may indeed be up against a de facto status quo, although he can't force you to contribute financially for the private schooling.

>2. With the current placement schedule having been in place
>for almost 2 years now, is it likely the court would want to
>preserve that status quo as I have requested?

Question is, how long has the new situation been in existence -- there may be a new status quo, right now.

>3. What am a missing? Is there a big facet of this that I have
>overlooked or should pay closer attention to?

You should have had orders re the child's education from the start. By leaving it in the air, with joint custody, either of you could have usurped the other's authority -- and, as you now realize, the other parent acted first.

The court will go with the child's best interests, even though the parent's motives may have been vindictive. So, the sooner you act, the better your changes of putting things right.

You can play the religion card, also, because neither of you are Lutheran, so you can argue that this status quo is an afront to your personal religious convictions, which should give your request more weight than if you were just arguing that you didn't like the public school in the father's district. In fact, you're lucky the kid isn't in public school, because if she were, you would be at an extreme disadvantage already.

[Zephyr]

ok

I included the contempt because of the enrollment in school, without notification and multiple medical appointments without notification- I think I left out the medical in my first post. I am also requesting the contempt based on the fact that father tells the child the food I feed her is poison...realistically I am hoping to make the court aware of what is going on, get a clarified order, have the court order him to follow the order, set it up to where if he continues to behave this way the court will find him in contempt.

The new school situation has only been in effect for about 4-6 weeks, since the start of this school year...and since she is there only every other week- she has only attended that school for 3 weeks- if that makes a difference.

I filed the paperwork on Tuesday of this week- basically as soon as I had confirmation that she was in a different school....however the court date is not until November 14...will the status quo be based upon when this was filed or when it is heard?

[socrateaser]

>I filed the paperwork on Tuesday of this week- basically as
>soon as I had confirmation that she was in a different
>school....however the court date is not until November
>14...will the status quo be based upon when this was filed or
>when it is heard?

When it's heard, because that is reality.

I've not read your current orders, but there's no contempt, unless the other parent has expressly violated something in those orders. Regardless, you will have an opportunity to have the orders clarified. You should have an argument for why your school district should be preferred, because the issue needs to be resolved so as to eliminate further dispute.

[Zephyr]

Clarification of the educational orders -- yes, but not contempt -- there's no facts to support a contempt. You may want to move for primary placement, but now that Dad has already started the ball, you may indeed be up against a de facto status quo, although he can't force you to contribute financially for the private schooling.


just for clarification on my own part- does anything constitute an actionable violation of "joint legal custody" without being specified in an order?

[socrateaser]

>just for clarification on my own part- does anything
>constitute an actionable violation of "joint legal custody"
>without being specified in an order?

Joint legal custody means that both parents have the joint right to COMPLETE control and custody over the child. In practice, it means that the last parent to decide wins, because the decision overrules any prior decision of the other parent.

You could go to the school today and withdraw the child, and there would be nothing that the other parent could do about it, except to re-enroll the child at the next opportunity, and so on and so forth, until the school got so annoyed that it refused to take the child. And, or you could enroll the child in your district.

The point is that joint custody with no other orders is a total free for all, because it's just like how it was when you were married (which, if it worked, you wouldn't be divorced).

So, if you have joint custody with 50/50 and no other orders, then the only contempt possible, is if one of you refuses to follow the schedule. Other than that, you can both do whatever you want, and the court will not find either of you in contempt.

So, get some more specific orders/parenting plans so that this can't continue.