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Ex has decided once again she doesn't want her...

Started by wallyworld, Dec 11, 2006, 01:05:38 PM

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wallyworld

Custody/Visitation jurisdiction FL
Child support IL

This is the third time that she has asked me to take her for an undetermined amount of time.

(2002) 1st time ended with me filing too early (stupid lawyer) with allegations of her abusing my daughter--- So ex got her back and I got very liberal visitation (at ex's request) Spent well over 10000 on lawyer fees

(Feb 2006) 2nd time ended with her changing her mind and later I found that my daughter resided without her mom and only with maternal g parents.

now Dec 2006-  She has asked me again as now she has a husband who doesn't like my daughter and they have a new 3 month old together--They are having much difficulty that divorce will happen if things continue...

She stated that basically she's choosing the ex instead of my daughter.  Sad I know.  But I am happy.  Most parents on my side will NEVER hear those words.


I know that I will have to wait 6 months before filing in iL for custody--If I decide to actually go that route (scared that ex will change her mind and I'll lose my daughter again (for the 3 time)

She brought up child support.  If I draw up an agreement and she has it notorized to stop cihld support (in IL) will that suffice.

What else should I do?

socrateaser

>She stated that basically she's choosing the ex instead of my
>daughter.  Sad I know.  But I am happy.  Most parents on my
>side will NEVER hear those words.
>
>I know that I will have to wait 6 months before filing in iL
>for custody--If I decide to actually go that route (scared
>that ex will change her mind and I'll lose my daughter again
>(for the 3 time)
>
>She brought up child support.  If I draw up an agreement and
>she has it notorized to stop cihld support (in IL) will that
>suffice.
>
>What else should I do?

Move for entry of a stipulated support mod and change in primary custody on grounds that mother has tendered primary custody of the child to father.

Do not take the child until the mother stipulates to the orders. Otherwise, she'll change her mind and you won't be able to prove that she agreed. If she refuses then just tell her that you won't accept custody of the child, because you can't count on mom not changing her mind and drawing you into another expensive court battle.

wallyworld

which court do I file it in IL (where child support holds jurisdiction) or FL (where custody has jurisdiction?)  

If I could do it all in one stipulated mod.  it would be more likely that she would sign because she has agreed to sign the stop child support.



Ie:  To end the child support you would have to give me temporary custody.  

I heard that once your granted temp. custody it's very hard to regain custody period....

1.  Do I file in FL or IL courts.

2.  Is it possible to do it in one agreed stipulation?

3.  Would I word the "title" on the documetn as Agreed Order and then state what we have agreed to?

socrateaser

>which court do I file it in IL (where child support holds
>jurisdiction) or FL (where custody has jurisdiction?)  
>
>If I could do it all in one stipulated mod.  it would be more
>likely that she would sign because she has agreed to sign the
>stop child support.
>
>
>
>Ie:  To end the child support you would have to give me
>temporary custody.  
>
>I heard that once your granted temp. custody it's very hard to
>regain custody period....
>
>1.  Do I file in FL or IL courts.

FL

>
>2.  Is it possible to do it in one agreed stipulation?

Yes.

>
>3.  Would I word the "title" on the documetn as Agreed Order
>and then state what we have agreed to?

I don't know Fl procedure. I'd have to research it, before I could give you the right process (if you want me to do that, you'll have to pay). Don't you already have a stipulated FL motion and order that you can use as a template?

wallyworld

I think I may.

I just thought of one more thing.  My ex told me she's moving from FL to New York Jan. 1st.  
 
how is this stip?

  STIPULATION ON DOMESTICATION OF FOREIGN JUDGEMENT
       
     COMES NOW the parties, husband and wife, both parties pro se, herby stipulate and agree as follows:
   
   1.  This Court has jurisdiction of the parties and the subject  matter of this action.
   
   2.  The parties were divorced on the 23rd day of April, 2001 by judgment of the Circuit Court of the Ninth Judicial Circuit of Knox County, State of Illinois ("the divorce decree").  In the divorce decree, the former wife/mother, wife, was designated as the primary residential parent of the parties minor child, and the former husband/father, father, was designated as the secondary residential parent and provided visitation.
   3.  The parties agree that, since the entry of the divorce decree, the State of Florida has become the "home state" of the child, as that term is defined under Chapter 61, Florida Statutes.  The parties agree that as long as either the mother or the child reside primarily in the State of Florida, that the State of Florida shall have exclusive jurisdiction of all disputes regarding visitation or custody of said child.
   
               4.  The parties agree that the child custody set forth in the divorce decree should be modified and the Father shall temporarily  be designated as the primary residential parent of the parties minor child, and the former wife shall be designated as the secondary residential parent.
   5.  The parties agree that the former wife shall be allowed substantial visitation during school breaks.  The parties have agreed that the Mother will enjoy visitation during any school holiday lasting longer than 2 days with proper notification to the Father.  The parties will alternate Christmas.  The Mother shall enjoy Christmas visitation odd numbered years and the Father shall have Christmas visitation even numbered years.
The parties shall otherwise agree to the Shared Parental Responsibility Schedule and Standard Visitation schedule.
   
                6.  The mother shall be responsible for all costs of transportation with the exception of summer where the parties will equally spilt the costs of transportation.

                7.  To the extent that differences arise between the parties relating to visitation, they have agreed to cooperate with one another in good faith toward a resolution prior to instituting court action.
 
                8.  The Father's current child support obligation in IL shall terminate 01/01/07

______________________________________

Former Wife/Mother


______________________________________

Former Husband/Father


   



1. Doesthe fact that she's moving change where I file as she will no longer be living in FL?

2.If she moves and gives her to me wouldn't that be seen as abadonment and I could file in IL where I live?

3.  Does this stip.  seem right.  Is it still a   STIPULATION ON DOMESTICATION OF FOREIGN JUDGEMENT as the divorce decree was ordered in IL not FL.  I copied a lot from one that she was supposed to sign earlier (obviously roles reversed as she was the primary residential parent).  

4.  Anything you'd do different in the stip?

5.  THey also live in Riverview FL now.  So technically Santa rosa county wouldn't have jurisdiction anymore would they?  Would I have to file this exact thing with hillsborough county courts instead of Santa Rosa county?

socrateaser

>I think I may.
>
>I just thought of one more thing.  My ex told me she's moving
>from FL to New York Jan. 1st.  
>
>how is this stip?
>
>  STIPULATION ON DOMESTICATION OF FOREIGN JUDGEMENT
>        
>     COMES NOW the parties, husband and wife, both parties pro
>se, herby stipulate and agree as follows:
>   
>   1.  This Court has jurisdiction of the parties and the
>subject  matter of this action.
>   
>   2.  The parties were divorced on the 23rd day of April, 2001
>by judgment of the Circuit Court of the Ninth Judicial Circuit
>of Knox County, State of Illinois ("the divorce decree").  In
>the divorce decree, the former wife/mother, wife, was
>designated as the primary residential parent of the parties
>minor child, and the former husband/father, father, was
>designated as the secondary residential parent and provided
>visitation.
>   3.  The parties agree that, since the entry of the divorce
>decree, the State of Florida has become the "home state" of
>the child, as that term is defined under Chapter 61, Florida
>Statutes.  The parties agree that as long as either the mother
>or the child reside primarily in the State of Florida, that
>the State of Florida shall have exclusive jurisdiction of all
>disputes regarding visitation or custody of said child.
>   
>               4.  The parties agree that the child custody
>set forth in the divorce decree should be modified and the
>Father shall be designated as the primary
>residential parent of the parties minor child, and the former
>wife shall be designated as the secondary residential parent.
>   5.  The parties agree that the former wife shall be allowed
>substantial visitation during school breaks.  The parties have
>agreed that the Mother will enjoy visitation during any school
>holiday lasting longer than 2 days with proper notification to
>the Father.  The parties will alternate Christmas.  The Mother
>shall enjoy Christmas visitation odd numbered years and the
>Father shall have Christmas visitation even numbered years.
>The parties shall otherwise agree to the Shared Parental
>Responsibility Schedule and Standard Visitation schedule.
>   
>                6.  The mother shall be responsible for all
>costs of transportation with the exception of summer where the
>parties will equally spilt the costs of transportation.
>
>                7.  To the extent that differences arise
>between the parties relating to visitation, they have agreed
>to cooperate with one another in good faith toward a
>resolution prior to instituting court action.
>
>                8.  The Father's current child support
>obligation in IL shall terminate 01/01/07
>
>______________________________________
>
>Former Wife/Mother
>
>
>______________________________________
>
>Former Husband/Father
>
>
>1. Doesthe fact that she's moving change where I file as she
>will no longer be living in FL?

If you get the stip filed before she moves, then it makes no difference at all. After she moves, IL will instantly obtain jurisdiction for all future custody actions. Future support actions with the mother as obligor will be controlled by NY law.

>
>2.If she moves and gives her to me wouldn't that be seen as
>abadonment and I could file in IL where I live?

Not abandonment, but yes, IL will obtain jurisdiction after she moves, because no party or child remains in FL.

>
>3.  Does this stip.  seem right.  Is it still a   STIPULATION
>ON DOMESTICATION OF FOREIGN JUDGEMENT as the divorce decree
>was ordered in IL not FL.  I copied a lot from one that she
>was supposed to sign earlier (obviously roles reversed as she
>was the primary residential parent).  

First, drop "temporary" from the text of the order. The order is now a STIPULATED ORDER MODIFYING CUSTODY AND CHILD SUPPORT.

>4.  Anything you'd do different in the stip?

Without knowing a lot more about FL law, I can't really comment. The stip you provide probably handles most of the big picture.

>
>5.  THey also live in Riverview FL now.  So technically Santa
>rosa county wouldn't have jurisdiction anymore would they?
>Would I have to file this exact thing with hillsborough county
>courts instead of Santa Rosa county?

The county where the case was last filed retains jurisdiction until a motion is filed for a change of venue in Santa Rosa County and the court grants the change. There's no point in doing that, if she signs the stip, then file it in Santa Rosa County.

PS. You could wait until she moves and then file a petition for custody in IL, along with the stipulated order. But, if she changes her mind and doesn't move, then you will be back where you started. So, it's better to file in FL if you can get it in before the move.

mishelle2

just a thought and suggestion: If you go to TroumandWallsh.com,(Mark Troum, Orlando Fl, but Wallsh is in the atty directory) they are family law attys in FL they may be able to help you put together the stipulated order, or at least tell you what needs to be in it.