Not trying to flood the boards, but......

[Kami]

I posted this on the father's board and didn't get a clear cut answer.  This is an important question!

Is it possible for me to find out whether social services has investigated my children's situation in BM's home? Do I have a legal right to know that?

There have been a few sudden, small improvements in my kids' health, grooming, and attire. But also the alienation seems to have really escalated, and there is talk of the family moving out of their state (escaping social services jurisdiction??) This move would be an extreme measure for them, for many reasons. But over the years BM has changed pediatricians several times, and finally stopped taking the kids for well child check ups 4 years ago...I think because the doctors were finally getting wise to the kids malnutrition issues.

A few years ago I talked briefly with the teachers about my kids severe underweight problem. As polite as I was...they were not happy to talk to me, and one said "I can't report these kids!" Because the kids have gotten even thinner since that time, I'm wondering if someone at the school did finally file a report with social services. And, of course, BM would assume the report came from me!!

Anyway, does the agency HAVE to tell me if they have investigated the situation?

Thanks for any help!!

[janM]

I thought teachers were mandatory reporters...

Why don't you call social services and ask them if you can have the information? Have you talked to the fomer doctors? Do you have joint legal custody that allows them to talk to you?

Why did you not file for custody when they were so badly off? And subpoena the professionals? "A few years ago"?? Did you take them to a doctor? (S)he would have to report any concerns.

I gotta know (and so would a judge) why this has gone on so long.

[mistoffolees]

Since you weren't able to get a helpful answer on the other board, you might want to consult with an attorney. A brief consultation won't cost you much (maybe nothing at all), but considering the importance of the issues you're discussing, that's where I would start.

[Kami]

>I thought teachers were mandatory reporters...

They are!!

>Why don't you call social services and ask them if you can
>have the information?

I wanted to know before I called if legally they had to give me the information.  I have made many reports to them in the past and they keep saying it doesn't rise to the level of an investigation.  (According to their State Statutes, it does!)

Have you talked to the fomer doctors? Do
>you have joint legal custody that allows them to talk to you?

In BM's State the courts don't grant joint custody unless the mother agrees, and of course she didn't.  I do have the legal right to all medical records.  And I do have copies. My attorney (a former pediatric nurse) and I both talked to one former Dr. on a regular basis for 2 years.  This Dr. had written in the kids' records that they were failing to thrive, falling off the growth chart, and having trouble maintaining their weight.  But she repeatedly refused to do any testing to find out the cause of the problem, and she repeatedly refused to recommend a second medical opinion.  Because of her uncooperativeness, and her lying under oath at a court hearing, I filed a complaint against her with the state medical licensing board.  As soon as they finished investigating her, she promptly moved about 3,000 moles away!

Since then, BM changed Drs several times, then stopped taking the kids to the Dr.

>Why did you not file for custody when they were so badly off?

I was told over and over again by many attorneys that I had a snowball's chance in Hell of getting custody of young children away from a mother in that particular State.  They said that she would practically have to murder one of the kids first.  So I spent two years and tens of thousands of dollars  in pointless mediation, trying to agree on a visitation plan.

Did you take them to a doctor? (S)he would have to report any
>concerns.

I have taken them to a pediatrician during their visits in my State many times.  She has expressed grave concerns, and has reported to social services in BM's state.  Nothing was done!

>I gotta know (and so would a judge) why this has gone on so
>long.

I am broke!  My family has helped as much as they can...they are now broke.  We are all still paying off past legal fees and court costs.

I have written to or sopken to everyone in BM's State whose job it is to protect children, and they all pass the buck, or just don't answer my letters...and yes, I have sent my kids' medical records and growth charts to everyone.  This particular State is extremely liberal, and mother-biased and the family courts are loaded with feminist judges.

[Kami]

Thanks, that's what I'll have to do.

[Kami]

Also, when I told one of the teachers that my kids were considered to be severely malnourished, based on their growth charts, she replied "Well, they eat their snack really wel!"  What kind of idiotic logic is that?!?!  Of course they eat their snack well...they're starving!!  When they're visiting with me they ask to eat every two hours, and they eat a lot!