Best psych testing....Suggestions?

[smtotwo]

So, after reading Stop Walking on Eggshells, more than one, DH and I feel that biomom is Borderline Personality Disorder.

What are the best test for this?  Psychologist? Forensic Psychologist?
High functioning BPD can manipulate around testing, MMPI's normally wont work.

So what do we ask for when requesting psych testing?

We're asking that ALL parties, me&DH, ex&hubby, all do testing,we don't want to point fingers at her.

HELP

[backwardsbike]

Boy, I have to get a copy of that book.  My ex and his new wife are classic BPD.  Ex is extremely cunning and manipulative.  And on top of that intelligent.  The psych who did our last eval ( I lost, again) says he is friendly and cooperative.  Yet every court action comes about because he will not follow the order and will not offer me one bit of flexibility.  Everything they do is just this side of being legally OK.  I feel like a dog on a short chain and my ex is a cat prancing about one millimeter beyond the reach of my chain.  It drives me insane.  I know they are lying their a$$es off and I can never concretely prove anything.

If you come up with any of thoses tests that are proven reliable and valid PLEASE tell me what they are!

[smtotwo]

there is another book called Splitting, but I think it's only available online

and go to this site...//www.BPDcentral.com

see if that gives you any ideas!

[backwardsbike]

I just read yoour post and went to the site.  It is awesome!  Thank you thank you thank you!

[onedaddy]

BM's lawyer requested a forensics evaluation because BM said DH was OCD and it was affecting the kids.
The evaluation was ordered and we agreed to their choice, who happened to be a police psychologist who teaches for the FBI in many countries.

We provided the evaluator with a thorough chronology along with all the proof we could provide.  We left the he said/she said stuff to a minimum.

Within the 30 page report it said BM was deceitful, uses the system to get her way, is manipulative, sociopathic, psychopathic, Anti-social behavior disorder and borderline personality.  He said the allegations she made against DH were most likely things she has done herself, she makes bad choices, is a threat to the DH and the kids and if the kids continue to live with her they will wind up in the system themselves. He also said the kids were obviously coached before going in to see him.

He did a thorough background check and confirmed our info that SF is a convicted felon with 26 violent arrests, 5 years in prison, 4 wives and 2 kids with no rights.

It said DH was riddled with anxiety but he is working on it.  I bit self-centered a lttle compulsive but not OCD.

You should know that BM is NOT AT ALL smart but she thinks.

Whatever type of evaluation you get make sure YOU supply them with valid proof.  Don't expect them to do all the digging. Also supply them with a list of names and phones numbers of people you think might be helpful to interview.  

[backwardsbike]

Wow, I dream of going before an evaluator who can see through the ex.  You are blessed to have had that eval.  Ironic it was BM who requested it.

The last evaluator we did did not seem to want to spend the time on the eval.  He said of my work history, " Just provide me your resume.  Why waste time talking about it when I can just read it."  I definitely had the feeling he was in it for the money.

We have documentation of things our therapist told him that favor us that he just didn't feel like reporting so he didn't. He outlined CP's concerns one by one in great detail but said that I " Provided an extensive list of concerns"  He didn't list a one.  Now just two months after the eval some of those concerns have become glaringly apparent while CP's concerns still have yet to matierialze after more than six years of him singing the same tune.

It is really frustrating!

[onedaddy]

I realize we got very lucky.  We got a GOOD evaluator who certainly took pride in his work.  He had video cameras everywhere from the parking lot to the waiting room, etc. BM said that DH was OCD, the evaluator put pictures and other things escew in his office and DH did not even notice. He set appointments with them back to back to see how they reacted together as BM said she was in fear for her life around DH.  She purposely bumped into him in the waiting room, stuck her nose in the air and shook her butt walking by him, while DH walked by quickly with his head down. He spent 6 sessions with DH, 6 session with BM, 1 session with DH and kids, 1 session with BM and kids, 1 session with myself and 1 with the SF.  He admitted to being fooled by her during the first session.  He refused to look at our proof until the very last session.
It certainly helped that BM is pretty stupid, she feels she is quite the contrary and tried to fool the tests and the evaluator.  You might want to check out my post yesterday in custody re: our custody trial that began on tuesday to get a better idea of this piece of work.
It's funny I ordered the transcript from last February, when BM's lawyer requested a forensics evaluation and this particular evaluator.  He then forgot to submit the order, so our lawyer did it in late June.  Now he's been asking the judge over and over to have her reevaluated by another expert they chose.  He's been flat out denied as our evaluator has a reputation with this court, this judge and this GAL.  BM's lawyer was sweating in court on Tuesday.  A far cry from his nasty, derogatory letters forcing DH to do as BM said 'if he wants to see the kids at all on his weekends"
It cost us $4,000 which was split 50/50 and we will pay him $1,000 for testifing; this I hear is quite cheap and for the hours he put in I'd have to agree.  
I know I read quite a bit of articles on this site regarding different types of evaluations that might also help.

[almostastepmom]

Was wondering what kind of proof you provided and how long did it take to have this done?  My SO's ex is Bi-polar and I think it affects the kids a lot.  They are scared of her and have been told that they are not to tell us ANYTHING that goes on in her home.  They live with her and we only get them 3 weekends in a row then 3 without.  Every time they come to our house it is so hard to re-train them to think like normal kids.

[jackie]

I am looking for a psychiatrist in the Abington-Willowgrove area inPa. that is versed in parental alienation as well as borderline personality disorder wich my son is displaying signs and symptoms . Please someone HELP ME. This has been going on since my son was 5 he is now almost 14 . I've been told it may be to late . His dad has said it was too late himself , that I have lost my son . Our child has pushed me behind walls to give me hugs at the age of 6 . Age 7 and on his dads fiance (now of 8 years) has had him call to say he hates me and loves her . he jas spit in my face . he has burnt down my sistres house out of anger and tells me he doesn't know if i'm his mom . His dad tries everything in his power to delay court procedings, psych. evals. and anything to keep him away from me not to mention the phone calls that take place when I do have our son . phone calls that take place every 2 hrs. Our son has ended up in a clinic on the premise that he was suicidal and he would kill me. Most people would have walked away by now , but I am determined to love our child and try as hard as I casn to get him help so he may be a functioning adult that can lead a normal life .