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It's been 9 years

Started by fromadistance, Aug 28, 2008, 02:58:02 PM

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fromadistance

Hello everyone. I am a non-custodial mother. Briefly, this is my story:
My Daughter was 2 when I thought it would be in her best interests to stay with her paternal grandmother. Ultimately, the court gave custody to the father. My Daughter has been with her dad for 9 years now.
I have tried to contact him over the years and he just hangs up on me. I haven't tried to contact him for about 3 years now because I figured that our Daughter is at a very impressionable age and I didn't want to throw her for a mental loop.

Friday 08.22.2008
My Daughter was at her grandmothers home during her everyother summer, two day visit. She asked her grandmother if she knew her Mom? Grandma said yes and asked if she wanted to see home movies and pictures. So, grandma took a full day teaching Daughter about her mother. No one had ever told Daughter about her biological Mom until then.

I have always been close with grandma. She's not my mother, but is a fine woman and we've always gotten along well. She and I have kept in touch over all these years.

9:30 p.m.
I receive a phone call. It's grandma saying that there's someone there who would really like to talk to me.
(Of course, I start shaking, sweating and feeling like I was going to get sick)
I say, "okaaaaaay".
Daughter: "Hi MOM!!!"
Laughing, I responded, "Hi sweetheart!"

It was as though we just picked up where we left off 9 years ago when she was just a baby yet. I even asked if she wanted to yell or scream at me and that would be ok. She said, "No Mom, I love you and I miss you!"

I fully expect there to be some yelling in my future, but for now, I'll take every sweet moment for what it's worth.

Daughter is adimate (sp) about seeing me. She didn't want to talk about anything else.

08.25.2008 I retained an attorney in the state where Daughter resides.

08.28.2008 I'm still waiting to find out what steps their going to take as far as petitioning the court, serving Dad papers, etc... I am about to go out of my mind with anxiety. My Daughter called me. My Daughter wants me. Seriously, what is taking so long.

Can someone PLEASE help me know what to expect?

They reside in Washington state by the way.



brwneyedmom

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! I'm sure that your heart is exploding with happiness so try to spend one day focused on the fact that you got to speak with your daughter.  How wonderful that you have an advocate in grandma!!
What state do you live in?  Just wondering, because I bet you will be in
Washington soon to see her.
I wish good things for grandma, your daughter and for you.  And I wish good things on dad.

Kitty C.

Your atty. will know best, but anyone here who's been to court will tell you it can seem like it takes forever.  The dockets are always full and who knows how far out an initial petition can be scheduled.  Expect this to take some time.  I can certainly understand how excited you and your daughter must be, but you have to have patience when you're dealing with the judicial system.  But any specific questions about how the court process works should be directed to your atty.  Different  jurisdictions operate under different rules.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

MothersGetARawDealToo

Good luck to you!!!  I hope you get a very nice visit with your daughter very soon!!