what happens when you can not afford to pay full cs required?

[KAT]

Ex isn't going to cut her a break. He had the children 50% of time, but she still demanded child support. What comes around, goes around.

NC is NOT likely to deviate from the guidelines simply because you can't afford it.  You'll start getting notices & then when it reaches 6 months or several grand you'll have to tell it to the judge. Arrears pile up, so does the interest. Luckily you have the right plumbing to cry your way out of it for several years before anything is really done to you for CRIMINAL NON SUPPORT.

What you can do? Start selling on e-bay. Heck, my sister clears 400 a month selling (used but in excellant condition, look for custom made ones) curtains she buys at Goodwill. It's NOT easy, it's certainly not fun,  but it helps her pay the mtg.

Actually, even though it doesn't sound like it, you do have my sympathy. HOWEVER we need more WOMEN to start SCREAMING & COMPLAINING about having to actually PAY child support for the laws to get changed. I bet before you found yourself in this position you never thought once upon hearing the term *Deadbead Dad*that the man simply couldn't AFFORD to pay & live too. Kinda changes things huh? Now, what are you going to do about it? VOTE, write letters, complain, kick & scream until someone listens then keep going until the laws are changed. Your 50 parenting time should not have been taken away unless you were proven unfit (which I don't think was the case, your ex didn't feel he should have to support your household so he did what he could not to....)

Good Luck.

KAT

[cathy]

PBFH was 3 months behind, or $1170.  Out went the notice to appear in court.

And you are right about the deviation...

[wendl]

I really think it depends on your state.

I am in WA my ex is 20K behind for my child, 10k for another womans child and 5k for another womans child.

Last payment I received was $29 in Sept.

Here in WA if the ncp is attempting to pay they really don't do much, like in my case ex has contempt charges filed against him by the state back in August, ex and the prosecutor are SUPPOSABLY working together but no contempt orders and really no cs as he is ATTEMPTING to pay.

I would speak with your cs worker and explain you have no problem paying support but cannot come up with the entire amount and ask if they could work with you.

You can also file a motion to modify CS based on your income etc and hopefully they will reduce it.

Good luck

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[cathy]

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/manuals/dss/cse/man/index.htm

You may want to review the information here - especially under enforcement.

You may want to call DHHS for any clarification you might need.  

BTW - what county are you in?

[jilly]

Yeah...in NC you get the notice when your arrears reaches $500.00.

My DH just received a notice that he had to pay $538.00 by November 1. He was in arrears because he changed jobs.  He is currently working as temp-to-hire.  He gave the agency he is working for all the information they needed prior to working for them and they just now started withholding CS from his paycheck. Until that time he wrote checks directly to CSE for CS.  I called the automated system on the 26th and as of that date the current amount owed was $161.38, so I doubt anything will come from the notice.  Of course, that's just from one County (Rockingham).  I'm not sure what the current amount owed or balance owed is for SD.  That information has to come from Rowan County.

His former employer sent in notice to CSE that he was no longer working for them but I don't know if they gave the new employer information.  I don't think they did because Rockingham County DSS sent him a letter requesting he contact them immediately and provide them with his new employer information. His respnse was "F*** them! I'm not giving them information so they can increase my child support!"  Anyway, it's not like they don't have ways to find that information without getting it from him.  So far, haven't heard anything else from them and hopefully we won't.

[LESLIEONE1]

you are right on some of the issues but as far as my parenting time taken away, it wasnt taken away so to speak. Kids boys 13, 16 stated they wanted to live with dad. Judge listened thought they were old enough to decide and granted it...plain and simple...heartbreaking on my end.We had both gone to evaluation and were both proven as fit parents, that was not the issue in court, it was what did the kids want.

[LESLIEONE1]

I will ck out the website.  I live in High Point, NC..guilford county.  My case is a very unusual one. He is in arrears by $2,000 and has been for 2 years...now tables turn, I have to pay and basically lost my kids, besides everyother week visitation. EX threatend me one day he would take the kids and I would have to pay him. He followed thru by being vendictive, bad mouthing me to my boys, and being able to buy them anything and everything they wanted. At 13 and 16 and going thru a family break up, this influenced them enough to tell the judge we love mom but want to live with dad....go figure.

[Wi-Mom]

Unless you have a rare blood type like AB neg. My brother had a girlfriend who used to make good money selling it. My son happens to have AB neg... hmm..

[Wi-Mom]

You know.. when my DH's 1st wife suddenly decided she was in love with another man.. he was a full time college student at the time. He did not have a job.. instead he took out a large enough school loan to pay tuition and the rent for the year. His wife worked at a bar for $5/hour for food. The idea was to get a degree so they could have a better life....

So she brings home another guy, says, "I never loved you get out.." The judge ordered DH to quit school, get a job and start supporting his kids. He got a job in a bakery for $8/hr. Upon quitting school the school loans became due immediately and he found his wages not only garnished for child support for their two children, but his check also garnished for the school loan. (10 Years later he's still paying that off!) He had no way to pay rent or anything, so he went to the Salvation Army in the area (Turned from satanism to Christianity) and literally ate once a week when his parents made the 5 hour drive every weekend to take him out to dinner. Finally, he moved in with them.. which is where he was living when I met him because there has never been any possible way he could ever afford to live on his own. He will forever be greatful to the Salvation Army, and if he were posting here he would make sure you knew that is an option if things get that bad.

[KAT]

it happens all the time. It's called Parental Alienation Syndrome, degrees vary. There is plenty of information on this site or do a web search.
DH's ex made it just bad enough so that Daddy could never get custody back...but close enough to the line where he wouldn't be arrested...ahh, who would pay support if he was in jail then eh? BTW, she lives in a little blue trailer, junk cars on the lawn, 2 dogs tied up in the back, couch on the porch in NC. You don't want to rent anywhere near that evil...it leaks ou the doors and I believe it could suffocate an upright, moral person.
KAT