child support to decrease

[true]

Hey there,

I had posted previously that recently we had a referee hearing that lasted less than ten minutes.

At that time I was ordered to provide total Medical Insurance as the ex's health insurance had become too burdensome for him. I didnt object.

We have been divorced for ten plus years with this being the first time the courts have initiated a "review". I had been afraid to ask for a review as some was better than none. Yet, more importantly so that the ex would have no reason to complain to the children about support, although the ex has and continues to do so.

Last week I recieved the "Referee Findings and Recommendation". In there it showed the financial recommendation which would have been an increase of 180 dollars per month to what is currently ordered.

This week I recieved a copy of the "Notice to Withold income for child support. They are ordering that child support be reduced from 450 dollars per month to 150.00 dollars per month for two children. Also, there is a 1/2 abatement during parenting time that is six plus days. That occurs at Christmas and summer. Christmas is at 12 days, summer is at 85 days. The ex chooses not to utilize Spring break which is an open option.

My ex currently makes a little over double of what I bring in. I do not see  this  current order even at a "cost of living" nor since the children have increased in age so has the expenses. I am totally perplexed and even dumbfounded that 37.50 a week is considered adequate.  

With the current with holding order this will fill my teenagers car for the week for travel to and from school, and possibly for travel to sports practices. Or it also will buy a gallon of milk, hamburger, spagettie sauce, cereal, lunch meat, bread, chicken, potatoes, spagettie noodles, granola bars, a roast, canned or frozen vegatables. (Per Week).

I guess I should feel grateful, as the child support will cover some things.

The cost of health insurance with my company is $744.00 per month. Which is taken bi monthyly at 372.00. My last payroll check was at 587.00 take home before the insurance was taken out.

I spent the weekend applying for a 2nd full time job in order to assist in covering the every day expenses for the three of us.

Thanks for listening & sorry for crying over spilled milk,

True

[williaer]

You should call your child support case worker right away and file an objection to the witholding. There is something wrong with that. You shouldn't beliving in poverty with two children. He helped make them and should help support them. this is coming from the wife of an obligor...raising a child/children is 50/50...everyone contributes. Don't jsut accept it- question it. You have the right to appeal.

[ocean]

I agree. Something is just not right with the numbers. Even if you had to get the medical the cost should be split by percentage. I would file an objection and get it straigtened out at the next hearing. Child support is usually by the numbers only so maybe they just misread numbers and because you were not there it was just inputed into the system? It almost sounds like you had 3 children and went down to two.....

[wysiwyg]

First let me prefice this post with a notation that I am no way am making any judgements or trying to argue any points of your situation.  SImply put the "system" is not just and any anger you may interpret from this post is geared at the system and not an anyone who endures any hardship from it.  That being said, my situation is a bit different:

I am a divorced mom of three - the court never ordered one DIME of support for my kids.  I worked three jobs to suppor them.  The ex said he would send money as he had some, instead he never saw the kids again, let the house that I left behind for him to live in (yes there was a court order for him to pay the mortgage on it) go back to the bank and he got "rid" of my dogs that I was to come back and get after I moved.  Rid = killed BTW, and never saw again = 12 years.

My current husband adopted my three kids, when we married, he also was married before and had a child of that marriage.  We have been through the wringer with that divorce, 12 years and over 100K in attorney fees etc.  The CS office "takes" what they feel is sufficient, as of now they take CS based upon a 1K week job when in fact my husband is a custodian in a school, trust me jobs are hard to come by as many will attest to.  My husband doe not have a college education only a trade school, but no matter how much we try and prove there is no college degree, they think we are lying and thus they imputed CS. With a court order addressing arrears, becasue the court system took 3.5 years to render a CS obligation, (the judge was off playing golf in England with my attorney at the time) we paid faithfully the ordered obligation plus arrears for 5 years, until the CS division came along one day and froze every dime we had,  becasue "they could".  We told them we had other children in the home, they said "their priority is the child of the first marraige not subsequent children".  So now the older kids are out in the military firghting for our country and I am having a hard time believing that they are fighting for our feedom and I do not know what that freedom is?  Is it a court system that did not support them, the same court system that had them rollerblading 14 miles a day to school for summer school or for their job becasue we could not aford the gas to transport them to/from school?  The same system that wanted to toss us out in the cold becasue we could not afford our rent when tehy froze our assets and then threatend to take our children away becasue of lack of living arrangements?  But we made it, we found a way to survive.

My whole point is this, the system is flawed and they will not admit it - they do what they want, how they want and when they want  - becasue as they say "we can."  

[true]

Just exactly 21 days later the ex has requested a "Hearing". We are to go before the courts now. The ex has booted the Referree for the Judge.

In general citing there has not been an increase in over 10 years. Requesting that it is just tooooooooooo much of an increase as the courts per the documents reviewed the child support each year without ever ordering additional payments. Citing that we should not split medical costs 50% to 50%. The ex has paid a total of $31.00 towards medical in all this time. Obviously there is a discrepancy in the medical. Also, with the liberal parenting time and held at the least costly advantage to the ex, I pay all transportation to and from.

At this point it is not worth the fight or argument. The children are the ones suffering from the parent alienation tactics that are huge and have been huge for years.

It is just a no win situation.

Thanks for listening. I have to go and write up a written response to some major marlarkey.

Sorry for venting,

true

[ocean]

I am very confused...
You went to a referree and he recommended and increase but when you got the order for to take it out of his check (which I do not understand why you got that? Here only the NCP and employer get that) it was for a lot less? Then he is going to fight this?
Sorry, I am missing something but have tried to re-read your posts and can not figure it out!

[wendl]

Did they have your current financial information and the amount of insurance you pay for the kids???

I would request a hearing or file an objection.


**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[true]

For the ref hearing
Submitted the last three years of my current tax returns.
as court ordered can only assume that the ex did so too. Those documents were not forwarded to me.

The ex married his current live in of about four years, for quite a few they wer both married to other people. FOC, did'nt find that odd. Went to Vegas for their hunnymoon the last week of July. The ex refused to allow me the telephone number of where the children were. Said it was none of my business as the ex has custodial parenting time. Odd .............with that refusal I was not allowed to call my child on their birthday as the newlyweds were on their hunnymoon.
She called me a week after her birthday to tell me she did not recieve her birthday card from me. even though I had sent it two week prior to her birthday. So a month transpired before she rec'd the birthday card, which she did call me to tell me she had gotten. In it was a "spa day" for her. A birthday card with a visit to have a "glamour day" etc.

There is a huge underlying thread of PA going on that is huge, both children are struggling with it in their own ways. The youngest is the deepest worry as her journal writings as she expresses to me are dark. The oldest is blatant verbally hard to deal with even on the phone.

With all their issues this child support issue is emotionally hard to deal with. The children believe that the ex is "paying too much" and should be relieved of any and all financial contributions. Tax page to tax page the ex makes and has made for a long time more than myself.

The ex is newly married and claiming it is unjust to pay more child support as it has not been raised in ten plus years. The ex is newly married, although has been living with this person and children for some years now. The current claim is that child support should not increase as the ex has a new spouse and child to support. (not a biological child)

The ex has been under the rader for years. The support has not been reviewed on my desired either verbally or in written. Although, in truth did ask for a review when Michigan went from County to State cut child support checks. This only due to no check as ever been cut that has the same amount on the check line. Phone calls, letters to the FOC department have gone unheaded throughout the years.

Most often, I have not approached the FOC as something is better than nothing. I have taken the tactic of just getting another job to  compenstate for my childrens financial needs.

I do not have confidence in Michigan FOC, at this time, for years actually.

Michigan FOC walks to a beat of their own drum.

I will write a written response, show up for the hearing, but I have sincere doubts that the children will prevail at this point in time.

The children do not have the golden spoon in their mouths, & most certainly do Not Piss Off this Judge.

His grudge is held for a lifetime.

Such is life,
true

PS: Venting again sorrys

[ocean]

It does not matter if he is remarried or not. The only way it would affect CS in SOME states (not mine) is if they had a child together, they may get "credit" for that child.

I am assuming they are there for a summer visit with father? Dad is PAS's them about money. You can do it two ways...
1. Tell them that money is between mom and dad, don't worry about it. Child support is to help pay for things for them. No more disucssion.
OR
2. Sit them down when they get back and show them the bill in a business like manner. Do not speak badly of their father. Just show them the facts. Try to explain to them, that children should be taken care of both parents. depending on their maturity level, you can go into this as far as you think. Then tell them you will answer questions but after this, you will take care of it. The stress is not for kids of any age to worry about it.

As for this next hearing (I am still confused but that is okay :) ) I would print out the child support calculations form the internet from what you think he makes and your income. Just listen....and say that this is what you found to be correct according to the numbers. Facts only...no big discussions about how he remarried...etc....   The children should NOT be there if it is just a child support hearing.

Good luck!

[Skippy89]

I am also confused about the witholding order being reduced.  The withholding order is not a court order, it is only a withholding order for the employer so they have guidlines on the garnishment.  The current order is still valid until a new order modifies it or changes it.

If you are concerned about the child support decreasing then make sure you got to court.  You can also request that medical be included in the monthly child support or be a set amount that he is ordered to pay each month for medical.  Most states will not pursue percentages for medical/daycare costs because they do not have the time nor the man power to take this action.  Most states can only enforce a judgment you obtain through the courts.