When is support due

[gemini3]

I think you hit the nail on the head - she's pissed.  The support order doesn't have a due date on it, so I don't know if it is technically due on the first or not.  I just send it when I get paid.  

[notnew]

Let me start off by saying that the only posts I read here were by Gemini so I don't know what anyone else said.

The court order is the binding document period. If it doesn't say a due date, then there is none. You are paying monthly on a regular basis and you have your proof so there is no issue for contempt.

Continue on with the cover your ass provisions and let her cry as much as she wants.

Sounds to me like she is counting on YOUR money to pay HER bill that is due on the first and because YOU aren't paying HER it's late. Too bad for her that she can't handle her finances better. NOT YOUR PROBLEM.

I don't understand why she would have closed the DCSE case and started having  you pay her directly except that she was equally unhappy with the payment receipt schedule in place with them.

I also don't see any reason why you should assume the burden and cost of re-opening a DCSE case when she is the one with the issue. As I said, if the court order does not give any direction, then there is none.

Sounds like your ex is a joy to deal with.

[gemini3]

She closed her case with DCSE because she felt that they weren't allocating her enough money, and filed a motion with the court to amend, which was denied.  That's where this "pissed" part comes in.  

Thanks for your advice.  I wanted to make sure that there wasn't anything she could actually do (except whine and complain).  I feel the same way you do - she should handle her finances better.  She knows when I get paid and when I send the check, and she should be managing her bills accordingly.  

Of course, she doesn't see it that way.  We also have a custody hearing coming up, and I think she's just grasping for straws to find a way to make me look bad.  She's saying that she can't buy things for the kids because I'm late on my support, I'm putting her in a bad position because I'm late, etc.  

[notnew]

But you see, you aren't late. Nothing you are doing is affecting the ability to take care of the children. You are consistently paying on a regular basis.

I think it is a wonderful idea to send the checks certified so you have your proof that you sent them.

I say keep silent on this issue. Let her go into court and say she doesn't have the ability to properly care for the children while blaming you the whole time and you come behind that with your supporting documentation that you have every ability to properly care for the children and do so every month. Maybe this will support a finding in which you get more custodial control with the kids. Wouldn't that be a hoot?

I am amazed I hit the nail on the head with the DCSE thing.

She is blowing smoke. Don't let her prode you into the reaction she's hoping for.

Did she bring the motion again this time? Sounds like she is abusing the system if so.

[gemini3]

Yes, she did.  We have had 4 motions just over support in less than a year.  The judge finally said something to her the last time, mostly because she had filed a motion to set support, and told the judge that it had never been set, when it had been set and we had been to court 2 other times over it where they backed up the original order.  

It's kind of complicated, even though it shouldn't be.  We agreed on a set amount in our divorce decree based on the fact that I was taking on all of the debts we had accrued in the marriage (I didn't have a lawyer and didn't realize this was a bad idea - trying to be the "nice guy", you know)  So as soon as the divorce was final she started filing trying to get the amount that she would get if the state calculated it.  So far, she has been unsuccessful.  

Now she's gotten a job to try and create a change in circumstance so she can ask to have it modified - even though she probably wouldn't get any more because they would have to include her income.  Her aim is to get around our original order.  Once she's done that she'll quit her job (she's never held one for more than 3 months) and have it recalculated based on one income.  That's what she's working on, even though it will never work.  The problem is that I have to keep going to court over it, and it's costing me a lot of time and money.  

[Jade]

>Yes, she did.  We have had 4 motions just over support in
>less than a year.  The judge finally said something to her the
>last time, mostly because she had filed a motion to set
>support, and told the judge that it had never been set, when
>it had been set and we had been to court 2 other times over it
>where they backed up the original order.  
>
>It's kind of complicated, even though it shouldn't be.  We
>agreed on a set amount in our divorce decree based on the fact
>that I was taking on all of the debts we had accrued in the
>marriage (I didn't have a lawyer and didn't realize this was a
>bad idea - trying to be the "nice guy", you know)  So as soon
>as the divorce was final she started filing trying to get the
>amount that she would get if the state calculated it.  So far,
>she has been unsuccessful.  
>
>Now she's gotten a job to try and create a change in
>circumstance so she can ask to have it modified - even though
>she probably wouldn't get any more because they would have to
>include her income.  Her aim is to get around our original
>order.  Once she's done that she'll quit her job (she's never
>held one for more than 3 months) and have it recalculated
>based on one income.  That's what she's working on, even
>though it will never work.  The problem is that I have to keep
>going to court over it, and it's costing me a lot of time and
>money.  

I wouldn't be too sure about her not getting anymore because she is working.  That depends on how your state computes child support.  

My ex would actually pay less child support if I weren't working.  The reason for this is that it is a shared  computation.  The higher the combined income, the higher the child support.  

[notnew]

However, in my state the number of nights is calculated to determine the percentage of responsibility each parent owes for the CS. So, in my case # of nights equals sole custody worksheet. My income is higher then BM's so her percentage of responsiblity couples with the nights factored in is lower than mine.

CS calculations are a messed up system. I have found that the calcuations really don't mean a lot except as a guideline to begin negotiations. If you can't settle on an amount out of court, then the Judge will decide and I am sure how they feel that day affects the decisions.

The last time I was in for a hearing where CS was supposed to be one of the factors heard, the Judge ACTUALLY asked me if I wanted it raised or lowered. I said I want it to be CORRECT because it was not figured correctly 5 years ago. I want it to be what it is supposed to be. He said "You probably don't want me to decide on this then" and put off the final decision which STILL hasn't been resolved 8 months later!!!

It is unreal how such a simple situation has been twisted to meet whatever needs fit the bill for the moment. Poor kids that are the ones who are losing in the end.

If you have an attorney Gemini, I'd see about file a motion for a protective order from frivilous filings. AND ask in all of your filings that she be ordered to reimburse you your attorney fees and if you are pro-se - your court costs in the least.

[notnew]

Can be cashed at any time now. New law went into effect a few years ago. Actual date does not matter.

[Kitty C.]

....when things don't happen when THEY want them to, right?

A few years back, DH got behind on CS a couple months, BM got her knickers in a twist and had the CS order filed with CSRU to have it garnished from DH.  Prior to that, the order was with the county court and DH paid them.  No problem, now we didn't have to remember to send a check twice a month.

Well, there's a lag time when it goes thru CSRU.  In the CS order, DH is allowed to claim SS EVERY year on taxes if he's current on CS.  Apparently that first year CSRU handled it all, she got a payment late (supposedly in Dec.).  I filed our taxes by mid- to late January, claiming SS since DH was current via garnishment.  Then BM tells him SHE'S claiming SS because CS was late, it wasn't auto-deposited into her acct. in time.

It took going back and forth numerous times and finally getting a notarized letter from CSRU for BM to prove to her that yes, he WAS current as of Dec. 31st.  And guess what?  By this time, it's almost MAY.  We knew what had happened.

Sure enough, a couple days before Christmas, we got a letter from the IRS claiming that SS's SSN had been used on two returns, one of them ours.  But the letter also said that if we had filed correctly, to ignore the letter.  I managed to contact an actual human at the local IRS office and explained the situation.....she told us to do nothing. Then I asked her what to do about the next year's return.  Quote her:  'File as soon as possible....he who claims first, gets it.'

To this day we have no idea if BM got in any hot water with the IRS in regards to this, but she has NEVER claimed DH is late with CS since.  And she screwed herself TWICE with all this BS.  #1:  CSRU calculates when THEY receive the funds from the employer, NOT when it gets into the hands of the CP.  And #2:  By getting pissy and trying to get back at DH by garnishing his wages, she GUARANTEES we can claim SS every year!!!!

Gemini, she's only 'threatening' and there's absolutely nothing she can do beyond that.  If DCSE has ordered it that way, it's because SHE initiated it by closing the case..........so she has only herself to blame.  I LOVE it when their 'acts of purported revenge' come back to bite them...HARD!

[Jade]

>....when things don't happen when THEY want them to, right?
>
>A few years back, DH got behind on CS a couple months, BM got
>her knickers in a twist and had the CS order filed with CSRU
>to have it garnished from DH.  Prior to that, the order was
>with the county court and DH paid them.  No problem, now we
>didn't have to remember to send a check twice a month.
>

I can certainly understand why she got upset that your dh wasn't paying his child support.  That is money for the children.  And if the mother is on a tight budget, the missed payments can be a big deal.  

That's one of the things that I like about automatic wage garnishment, the parent paying doesn't get to play around and forget to pay.  And the parent receiving doesn't get to play around and claim not to have received it.  Protects all parties involved (including the children) that way.