is it possible for me to get physical custody or what so?

[shjamal]

I'm 21 yrs old and i recently just got married and have a 3 yr old boy with her and I'm about to take off to the navy. Before this i had a boy with another girl, who is now 9 months, and i wish to have some type of custody over him. i've tried to be around him as much as possible but he lives in a different town from me. i do not have a vehicle to go back and forth but i would visit him for days at a time when i was up there. The baby's mother currently lives with her grandma because she has been kicked out of her moms house and her dads house. She works at a strip club which i dont think is great but she is also attending a tech school. My wife has a good job now and I had been working but i took these 2 months to prepare for the navy. I cant say she is a bad mom but she really doesnt have her priorites straight when it comes to him. One main reason why I want him is because I want him and his brother to grow up together. I dont want to take him away from her out of hatred or anything close to that, we are actually on pretty good terms. I've tried to convince her to let me take him but she doesnt want too at all. I just feel that i can raise him very well and offer him alot more since I am more stable and shall be for a good while. Overall, if I were to take this to court, would I have a good chance of getting him?

[wysiwyg]

Just my thoughts:

First - thanks for serving our country.  As a mil mom of a Army Sgt Daughter and a son that was Navy, I can offer a few cents here on this as well as just the custody side of things.

If you have a child and you are active duty I am most certain that you have to provide an alternative for parenting for the little ones in the event you get called to serve someplace away from your child (ren).  In this case your wife is mom to your child and your ex is mom to the 9 month old.  If you are on good terms with her, I would suggest that somehow you come to some aggreement that you can see the child when you are home on leave and times that you will not be working, and that perhaps while you are gone your current wife can take the 2 boys together to form that sibling bond.  You can maybe promote this as care for the child while she is at school or work.  Have your wife keep track (detailed) of when and for how long she cared for the child in the event it ever gets nasty.

If you are named as the father and you have a parenting plan in place see what it says for military parents, also some state laws address military as well.  

I am not sure how custody will work with you being active duty, I am not an attorney and can not really say.  

Good luck in the navy, it is a fine place to be and good career move.