Out of state

[cardinalfan57]

Hello,

Just joined the group,  I really could use some help form anyone out there who has been thru out of state custody issues.  My wife took my daughter out of state to MI to live with her parents(supposed to be temporary) 13 months ago, I have not seen my daughter since then.

To make a very long story short, No lawerys in my area can help me because my daughter resides in a state other then the one I reside in, and no lawyers that I have talked to in MI are willing to help, because I dont live there.  If anyone out there can help, ideas anything I am sending out a desperate SOS, its been a year since I have seen my little girl.

James

[Ref]

Sorry you are here.

My husband started out the same way you did. He didn't know that he could have stopped his ex from moving away, not that he would have because he too though it was temporary. 13 years later, we have been dealing with long distance visitation and court hearings a 4 hour flight away.

First, it appears that you have to go through the MI courts for your divorce due to the fact that your daughter/wife have been there over 6 months. If I were you, I would keep calling lawyers in MI and get as many free consulations as possible. When you settle on an attorney there, make sure he/she deals with Family Law. You don't need an abulance chaser. If he/she works with dad's rights, that would be a bonus. I don't think if you call around a bit more, you will have trouble finding lawyers to take your money.

My husband's parenting agreement was horrible after his divorce. One of the biggest issues with my husband's parenting agreement was that it was not specific enough. Vistitation was "reasonable visitation". That translates in the real world that he can have visitation when mom feels it is ok. After years of begging his ex for time with his daughter and information about her, he finally took her back to court for visitation change. Now it is MUCH better.

We have SD every other school break/holiday with dates and times spelled out and any weekend my husband asks 7 days in advance as long as it is in mom's town. I would love to have weekends without restriction of location, but it really isn't worth changing seeing as that we can't afford to see her that often anyway.

My husband has joint legal and physical custody even though it is long distance. SD has been flying to see us since she was 6. She goes through the unaccompanied minor program and has had very few problems over the past 9 years.

We also have a blog page on livejournal.com that we keep a journal of everything that is going on for SD. We do this because his ex blocks a lot of communication.  This allows us to write letters to her without BM blocking them. We also got an 888#. It costs about $5 a month but it stopped BM from complaining about length of phone calls. We pay both calls to and from SD.

It is very hard being long distance. You will not get all the school information or hear about doctor's appointments as if you were parenting in the state, but you will get by. You need to use your head and figure out how to get aound the obsticles. There are tons of us out there struggling through this and this will be a HUGE help to you.


Good Luck and Best Wishes
Ref