anger ??

[John-J-Jay]

as most of you know i have custody of my daughter whom i've had for 9 years. I got remarried and my 2nd ex wife filed for divorce and left.  my 2nd ex wife and my 1st are teaming against me in an attempt to try to destory me.

I filed a motion against my 1st ex wife 16 months ago because she hasn't paid child support in 4 years, then she has now turned this into a custody fight. my 2nd ex wife and 1st are claiming i have anger issues. i never hit my 1st or 2nd ex wife. did we ever get into any disagreements? yes. but they claim i have anger issues.

how does this play into a custody fight them claiming i have anger issues? what do i have to do to win to keep my child that i've had for 9 years, she almost 11 now. do they have to have evidence? please advise if you have had to fight anything like this that wasn't true.

[Kitty C.]

They MUST prove a 'significant change in circumstance' in regards to the child.  I know you've been told this before.  This means if they think you 'have anger problems', they have to prove how that is detrimental and affecting the child.  If they can't, they have no case.  One thing is certain:  in order to attempt to 'prove' this, they will have to request the court to order a psychological evaluation on you.  Make DAMN sure that they are included in this.  Meaning you will only submit to it if they do the same.  And that everyone has to pay for their own eval.  I wouldn't be surprised if they back down in a hurry.....I seriously doubt they would be willing to submit to someone crawling up their backside with a flashlight because they would be afraid of what might be 'found'....if you know what I mean.

John,  this is the same song-and-dance they've been attempting all along.  They are desparate and grasping at straws.

[John-J-Jay]

we both had psyschological eval done. The report came back that neither one of us diagonsed with anything. It was a dead heat. However in the recommendations of the psy. he stated that both parents needed to attend parenting classes. But then he said that i need to attend anger classes, he only put this in his report because my ex bashed me and said things about me that were not true. Saying things like when we were married 9 years ago i would hit her, throw things, punch holes in the wall, etc. But none of that happended, if it did why did she give me custody of a baby that was 2 at the time. But anyway the psychologist said i needed anger classes and he only said this because of what my ex put in her write up.

Neither one of us is bipolar, narassicts, Borderline Personality disorder etc. Neither one of us was diagonsed with anything at all per his report. so how does this play into it that he said i needed anger classess.

The ad litem that's involved said that she sees the report as even at this point.

[Kami]

Years ago my kids BM suddenly started demanding that my time with the kids be in a supervised setting.  She said she was afraid I would kidnap the kids, etc.  This was ridiculous...if I was going to kidnap my kids, why would I have hired a lawyer?  Both our attorneys and the GAL went back and forth on this non-issue for about 3 months and meanwhile I wasn't getting any visitation.  Finally I agreed to supervised visitation just so I could see my kids!  (This was NOT court ordered supervision!)  About 15 minutes into the first visit, the supervisor said  that I had good parenting skills and that it was silly for me to have to be there.  She passed that recommendation on to everyone involved, my regular visitation resumed, and BM shut up.

You might want to ask your attorney if it would be a show of good faith for you to agree to the anger management classes.  This might provide you with someone who could vouch for the fact that you don't have anger issues.

Kami