I just dont know what to do

[Cadain]

My whole situation is a mess right now and I am really not sure where to start so I will just do my best to give a good overview of the siuation.  I got divorced in Feb of 2006 and I moved in with soem friends, my child support was set at 600 a month for my 2 kids.  I paid this on time every month until January of 2007.  At this time I had to pack up and move out of state as I could not afford to live off what I was making in Louisiana.  I then moved to Oregon where my family is and got an apartment and lived off of my retirement that I had taken out when I left my job in LA.  I tried for months to find a job and could not do so.  During this time I got behind on my child support.  I then moved with my girlfriend to California where her family lived, and it took me a few more months to get a job there and we lived with her folks during that time.  I was finally able to get a job and my own place, however due to how much it costs to live here in California versus how much I make I havent been able to make my full child support payments even now.  I have sent $200 a few time and everytime I would do this my ex would not cash the checks.  So now I am about $11,000 behind on child support.  She has now taken me back to court and the judge didnt care that I had struggled to find work and that I had at least attempted to send what money I could when I did finally get a job.  The judge gave me 2 months to come up with $6,000 or I go to prison for 3 months.  My ex also now wants sole custody and $1,100 a month in child support plus an extra $200 a month for the back child support.  I have no way of coming up with this money, and my girlfriend who is now my wife has been trying like crazy to find a job but we live in a very small town that has been hit hard by the bad economy and nobody is hiring.  Now its not that I am saying that my kids are not intitled to the back child support owed because they are, and its not that I dont want to give them more then what I can right now but I just cant make money appear out of thin air.  Wth enough time put in where I work I will eventually make good money and I plan on going back to school to go for my masters degree (as my work pays for this).  However this will all take time and no matter what I try or how much money I try to send every month my ex is determined to see me put in prison.  I think alot of it is due to anger over the divorce as she is constantly asking me to come back to her and why I left and how I ruined her life and so on and so on.  She calls me names in front of the kids, she calls my wife names all the time.  I just want to find a way to make this work for everyone.  I would love nothing more then to find a payment plan I can afford and be able to modify as I make more money or my wife finally finds work.  I just want to be there for my kids, I want to take care of them and support them both financially and emotionally and if I go to prison I will lose my job and my home and everything I own.  My wife and step-daughter have nowhere to go and will be out on the streets and I wont be able to get a job in my field ever again as I have to be able to pass very high security checks as I handle very for your eyes only documents.  I will not be able to do that anymore with a prison record.  This worries me due to all that I have done to get here in my career as well as the fact that then I will be lucky to be able to get very low paying jobs and then how will I ever be able to support my children.  I am so stressed and so worried and I just want nothing more then to find a way to make this right.  The judge says she doesnt care if I can afford to live or not and that she doesnt care that I have tried to send what I can.  I feel like I basically have no rights and that because I am the man I should just have to live in the streets and send every dime I can scrounge up to the ex.  I just dont know what to do.  I cant even afford a lawyer but according to their money standards I make too much for a free lawyer.  It all seems so hopeless for both me and my children.  I know what its like to grow up without a dad and I dont want that for them.

[Cadain]

I guess nobody out there can help at all?  Any suggestions or advice would be great... I just want to get all of this taken care of so my children can be happy and have a mother and father who love them.

[superdad01]

Well here's an idea. GO back with her. Tell her that you want to start over and you can't officially start over with that back childsupport monkey on your back. She can go down there and drop the money you owe. Make that one of your conditions for getting back togther. Now you could either A try and make it work or drop her like a bad habit. Two benefits is, you get to see your kids and 2 you got the money monkey off your back.

I diden't say it was good advice but desperate times call for desperate measures.