MAJOR DELIMA

[leeodell03]

Ok i'm in Missouri and wife filed for divorce (she beat my papers to court) in clay county missouri.  My questions are these.

She is filing for joint custody with her as mailing address, but wants to move out of school district my daughters in to a less quality school and my 9 yr old daughter wants to stay.  Do you think court will allow this?

She does NOT clean or keep the house clean at all and I have pictures from after I moved out of how she kept the house.  Now the house forclosed and she lives with her grandparents and house cleaning the same if not worse due to 6 dogs, 4 birds, etc... (my daughter loves animals but come on).  If i present this will it give me an advantage if i change from joint custody to going for full custody

She is 9 and always wants to stay at my house.  I'm currently living with my parents part time and with my girlfriend other time.  We can't buy a house i guess till divorce cause she can ask for equity I guess not sure but attorney thinks so.  She cries when she has to leave my house and calls me asking me to come get her now and then.  Granted she loves her mom but just lost I think.  Do you think the court will ask her where she wants to live at age of 9 yrs old? and do you think this will help my chances of getting my daughter full custody?

My wife had house in her name and vehicle in her name only on loans, my name wasn't on loan but on titles.  Do you think the court will order me to pay for either?

[MixedBag]

First off Merry Christmas!!!

I think some of the stuff you mentioned won't make a big difference in court in terms of custody of the child.

Do your parents live in the same school district as the one your child wants to go to???

If not, then that would be my advice.  Get a place so that your child doesn't have to switch schools and ask for at least 50/50 with primary residential placement for the sake of the child.

The property stuff -- hard to say because none of us are attorneys and a lot of that stuff depends on if the loan was taken out before, during, or after the marriage.

I also wouldn't necessarily be afraid of buying a house AFTER you two split up particularly if it's in the right school district.

IMHO -- keep girlfriend on the outskirts of everything until the divorce is final and can't be appealed.

[leeodell03]

My parents are in the same school district but she would go to a different elementary school.  In our school district there is 3 different schools.  My daughter wants to go to the same one.  I talked to my attorney and he says that she can come after any equity i have in the house when divorce is final but I'm to the point oh well chance it  LOL

Property was bought while married but only she is on loan and liable for the property.

why does the girlfriend need to be on outskirts?  Ex knows I have one now and its not a secret.  My lawyer told me that its fine and nothing wrong with it cause not like i'm gonna be to myself just cause of a divorce ya know.

Well i appreciate any help you guys have I have never been through this before and there is always TONS OF QUESTIONS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[MixedBag]

Get a second opinion about the property stuff.

Do you two have any kind of marital separation agreement???

Yes, I think I would ask -- we're separated, I'm buying a new/different residence, HOW is she entitled to any of THAT?

I think you could be on the hook and financially responsible for the marital residence.....only via the divorce decree.  The bank is gonna go after her only if she defaults because the loan is only in her name.  BUT if you're ordered to pay part of the mortgage directly, then she can come after you.   

This is all my opinion -- and sorta the same as splitting a joint loan.  You can do it via the decree, but that doesn't guarantee the bank will honor how the family court split or assigned responsibility for it.

As for the girlfriend....if Mom is still acting o.k. then fine.  Just be very careful and don't let the girlfriend take the lead on decisions -- that will cause friction (IMHO) and make the divorce messier.