Newbie only semi frustrated ow, but still a long road a head.

[HFXMOM]

Hi everyone!

Since everyone has given such good advice, thought I should update you all on my situation. ) I split up with my BF for a week, and during that week tried reverse physicology on him - I was lucky! It worked. He now understands my situation. He is getting a long much better with his ex. However, she has also told him she is still inlove with him. He's told her that he's moved on. She dropped their daughter off this Friday night past, and stayed for a bit to talk with him (I wasn't there) - she then tried to invite herself over night, but he politely showed her the door, and called me immediately after to tell me how the whole thing played out.

He's talked to his son, and has made him understand that he is with me, and as long as we can work things out, he will be with me. If he wants to come an visit when I'm there, great! If not, they can arrange another time to have father- son time. I've sat down with his son and told him myself that I will never come between he and his dad, but he also needs to realize that his dad and I are together, and love each other very much. He should be happy for his dad and I. I also told him that I love both he and his sister, and I hope that someday he will accept that.

The only other obstacle is with his daughter. He still cam't come to grips with the "taking her to task" when she behaves poorly. On a brighter note, his first councilling session is next week, and I think that once he's been there for a few months, he may see the light and find out that you need to be a parent to your children before you can be their friend. All in all, I'm trying to be very optimistic, and hope things go the way we both want them to go. However, I'm not nieve enough to think that this can all be cured over night. Baby steps. We are both working so hard towards a future.

I've also told him that I'm tired of being his mother, therapist, and legal advisor. He didn't know that I felt so strongly. I told him that I don't mind being his support - not at all, but I can't solve all his problems for him. He's accepted that and asked how he can aleviate those stresses for me, so that I can concentrate on being "me", and being "us".  Needless to say - I'm optimistic. Keep your fingers crossed for me all!

In the mean time, I'll continue to keep everyone posted, and probably even have a venting fest from time to time...LOL