Welcome to SPARC Forums. Please login or sign up.

Apr 29, 2024, 05:01:32 PM

Login with username, password and session length

gal to visit next week

Started by newohio, Oct 29, 2009, 09:43:52 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

newohio

my first meeting with attorney/guardian is scheduled for next week, in my home

other than not bashing the ex,  are there any suggestions?

also, should i have my daughter there?  would it be best that the gal meet with her and see both of my kids together, or being that she is to visit her father, should i let the gal see that i don't interfere with their schedule?

thanks for any thoughts

Kitty C.

Don't mess with the parenting schedule, but do make the GAL aware that the child will not be with you that day ahead of time.  They may or may not want the child there, but that's up to them.  If they do want the child there, they will reschedule.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

gemini3

If the GAL does not choose to reschedule, ask if there will be another meeting when they will meet with the child.  They should have a meeting with you and the child together.  Some states require it.

snowrose

Our GAL made sure to schedule for when the child would be there.  And then there were separate interviews for our discussing concerns about the relationships.  (It's one thing to not attack the ex, and another to realistically tell them about concerns that you have for how the child is treated.)

newohio

thank you,  i will call & ask if they would like her there or to reschedule.


i guess i'm looking for any stupid little thing that has helped or hurt someones case

ie:  has anyone had a problem because there was a window blind cord left within reach of the child

what "one" thing am i overlooking;  what's that one silly thing they notice?

house is clean,  i own the home
outlets all have covers
safe, fenced yard
no booze in the house, no one drinks
child has own room, toddler bed
there is a tv in his room... is that ok?

what if there's a baseball on the floor???   am i just worrying tooooo much???

Kitty C.

Yes, but that's to be expected.........

The only other suggestion I would make is to make sure you have working smoke and CO2 detectors in the home and on every floor.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......

MrCustodyCoach

You're definitely worrying too much.

They're typically looking for a reasonably safe home.  Their focus will be on your interactions with the child, your demeanor, and how you carry yourself with any discussions you should have.  Focus more on the joy of your parenting and less on "bashing" the ex.

If questions are asked about the ex, couch them in terms of your "concern" about anything that concerns you.  For instance, there is a difference between...

"The stupid ass lets the child stay up until all hours of the night and that's just not right.  It makes me sick."

And...

"Well, I am concerned about the impact on [child's] health.  I'm aware that he's permitted to stay up until midnight and I know that a lack of a good, full night's sleep can have a negative impact on the child's disposition and ability to learn.  It's my hope that this situation will change to something more beneficial to him."
Mr. Custody Coach - Win Child Custody "Better Prepared, Better Outcome"

*The opinions in this post are solely my own and do not represent the only way to address any particular issue.

newohio

update:  gal did home visit,  not much of anything

daughter was home,  which did not seem to matter
gal asked to speak with me privately, never asked her a thing
never asked to see anything
just went over visitation concerns

strange... i would have thought they'd like to at least see the childs bedroom!

anyone else have a visit like this?

leaves me to wonder how much he will "investigate" at the ex's