Being denied communication

[mdegol]

Have to agree with Davy.  Interstate child custody is based on child's residence for initial custody jurisdiction (subject matter jurisdiction).  However, child support (or jurisdiction over the father) can be based on the smallest of connections.  Simple as a speeding tickets, renting a car, doing any business in a state whatsoever subjects YOU to their jurisdiction.  Him staying away from Texas is a good idea, since it makes his jurisdiction argument even stronger.  I was in a similiar situation, and even if child never lived in contested state (actually Texas) my lawyer was very happy that child had never even BEEN inside the state for even 30 seconds.   I, on the other hand, had lived in Texas for a short time.  So while the subject matter and child was not in the jurisdiction of Texas, I WAS subject to Texas' jurisdiction.

[NYParent]

On my last visit to TX was when I got served with the summons.  When I did the motion to dismiss based on subject and personal matter jurisdiction, the judge informed me that since I rented a car in TX and in turn had conducted business in the state of TX, then they did have personal matter jurisdiction.  I know....doesn't make sense, but that's how it goes.

I was advised by my attorneys that until jurisdiction was settled, to be very careful about traveling to the state of TX; even to visit my child.  They said it was very common to have the other party try their hardest to get your arrested over the most frivolous things to use it as a way to get jurisdiction over the case.  This is the case with BM....she started bring this man to all our drop offs (which I didn't have a problem with) and come to find out he's a police officer dressed in plain clothing.  I was wondering why she was making a big deal about that third person there and screaming that she was afraid that I was going to hit her (when I NEVER have nor would I).....I let her scream all she wants, I didn't even speak to her.  I simply gave my child a kiss and said goodbye.

[MrCustodyCoach]

Every other day is not excessive.  As an aside, I often strongly urge people not to repeatedly communicate or threaten details regarding future litigation and why.  The only purpose that serves is to give them time to prepare a defense, even if fabricate, for it.

You make a few meaningful efforts to get her to permit appropriate levels of access to the child and record her refusals as well as journaling the details of every attempt made.  When, times, duration, etc.

Then, instead of threatening (and wasting your money on your attorney sending letters and faxes) - you just act.  You address the matter in court, not through repeated emails... THAT can be construed as "controlling and harassing."

[Davy]

Snowrose seemingly has everything backwards.

Kidnapper left TX  on a Saturday to visit a dying aunt in IL and filed for divorce/custody on Monday in IL venue #1 where the kids had NEVER been before.    The TX children were thriving like always in school and all activities.

PI reported kidnapper left venue #1 approx. 2 weeks after filing to parts unknown. 

Retained first & 2nd IL attorney by phone....never personally met neither  (IL and TX attorneys forbid my presence in IL for fear of justifying IL jurisdiction).  Hand carried case file to 3rd IL attorney in the dark of the night. Argued jurisdictional issues for 3.5 months (should have taken 5 minutes). Judge stated IL has absolutely no jurisdiction over any parties BUT would not dismiss the case until TX father filed for divorce in TX (how valid is that).

Kidnapper filed in IL :
venue # 2 again for custody
venue # 3 to defeat my property rights (no notice)
venue # 4 placing daughter for adoption (notice a formality)
venue # 5 & 6  for custodial interference against father (no notice)
venue # 7 in TX ... took ys from school

Father filed in TX by force and IL Federal (PKPA) and ordered kids returned home and IL venues to stop all proceedings.
Note : not taken kindly by TX judge in the Republic.  Federal court did what he refused (return kids) and he immediately sent kids back to IL during 5 minute temporary hearing changing custody from father to kidnapper while NOT allowing evidence of  physical abuse to children.

Father left TX (and TX lost jurisdiction) to stop the abuse in IL.   

Father prevailed in EVERY venue in both states either with an attorney or pro se  EXCEPT when 12 hour notice given for final judgement after lsing jurisdiction.  The ABUSE STOPPED !!

What about the kids .... one thing is that kidnapper kidnapped grandchildren in FL and daughter is paying CS (ys just sent $1000 from OUR business).

Happy motoring !!

[gemini3]

I agree with MrCustodyCoach.  One additional suggestion would be to send your ex a letter (just one) certified mail.  Outline your request for contact with your child, and suggest a schedule.  For example, M-W-F at 7:45 p.m.  Ask that, if she does not agree with the schedule she suggest an alternate arrangement.  Then, unless you hear back from her, start calling at the times in your letter.  Write your attempts down in your journal.

I think that this would be more helpful than calling and e-mailing constantly.  It will show your willingness to work with her, and her unwillingness to do the same.  You will have at least four weeks of attempting to call according to the suggested schedule.  She won't be able to use the excuse that she wasn't there, it wasn't convenient, etc, etc.  Your attorney will just have to ask why she didn't suggest an alternate schedule.

[NYParent]

gemini- That's a great suggestion!  Thanks

[Davy]

IMHO, the advice offered by MrCustodyCoach and Gemini3 is good advice for the future.

[renald38]

I just drove home from georgia expecting to have my children with me on my weekend,but instead im attacked in the front yard by my ex wife and husband yelling obsecenities at me while my children stand and watch.I go through this every other weekend and always drive back to sc without my children.Noone will help me and lawyers want 1000s of dollars before they even hear my case.She gets her child support and all that was agreed upon,so why does she have the right to keep my kids from me.She hasnt let me speak to them in two weeks,and when i showed up tonight to pick them up,in which i arrived at 6 pm and they didnt come home til 10pm and ordered my children in the house and not speak to me.And what do the cops say NOTHING<NOTHING AT ALL.Im am sick and tired of the bs and i want to know why my voice wont be heard.

[snowrose]

Snowrose seemingly has everything backwards.

<snip>

No, actually I don't have everything backwards.  I gave the answer I believed was right for NYParent's case, and then I quietly accepted other people's differences of opinion - you should really try that. 

OTOH, you just usually talk about yourself.

[gemini3]

I just drove home from georgia expecting to have my children with me on my weekend,but instead im attacked in the front yard by my ex wife and husband yelling obsecenities at me while my children stand and watch.I go through this every other weekend and always drive back to sc without my children.Noone will help me and lawyers want 1000s of dollars before they even hear my case.She gets her child support and all that was agreed upon,so why does she have the right to keep my kids from me.She hasnt let me speak to them in two weeks,and when i showed up tonight to pick them up,in which i arrived at 6 pm and they didnt come home til 10pm and ordered my children in the house and not speak to me.And what do the cops say NOTHING<NOTHING AT ALL.Im am sick and tired of the bs and i want to know why my voice wont be heard.

Renald38, please start a new post with this issue.