Welcome to SPARC Forums. Please login or sign up.

Jul 18, 2024, 03:53:06 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Wife Wants to Relocate My Daughter to Texas

Started by TheSeaOShea, Aug 11, 2011, 08:09:34 AM

Previous topic - Next topic


My wife, for a year has been attempting to relocate my daughter (15) to Texas. She has been living in a one-bedroom extended stay hotel for six months. Her family is paying $1,600 per month for it. The wife refuses to talk to me, yet alleges I won't help her financially and so she "needs" to relocate to get the support of her own family. She agreed to the alimony and child support I pay faithfully every month. She is the one who left me. 31 years. Her allegations are that I verbally abused her for 31 years. ?? No history. Four wonderful children. She just wants out of Florida and is manufacturing this. Now just recently, at trial which continues, she now states my daughter "is afraid" of me. ?? Again, no history. Everyone says I've done everything right but why do I feel just because my wife is 'playing the victim' and can't support herself, she'll be allowed to relocate my daughter?

Timeline below:
1.            Me, my wife and daughter moved to Florida in August-September of 2009 for a job opportunity. My wife was not happy with the move here. Around Thanksgiving, she made the comment to me that I "dragged her here." The same comments were made to my sisters.
2.            At the end of April, 2010, my wife informed me she wanted to vacation with her mother and brother in Barbados. A vacation we could not afford and in doing so, would eliminate the planned vacation we had in August, 2010 to Cocoa Beach. I had not had a vacation with her or my daughter for eight years, since 2002 and was upset she preferred to vacation a third time in that period instead of with me.
4.            My daughter witnessed the end of an argument between my wife and I that originated in our bedroom. Specifically, the argument ended on the side of the house where our daughter's room was as I wanted to remove myself from the argument. My wife chased me down the hall and continually tried to grab me, which is what the daughter was exposed to.
5.            My wife from that time forth laid with our daughter in her bedroom each night and at times discussed with our daughter where they would live, separate from me, specifically, asking where she wanted to live.
6.            During that same May, I sought counseling for my daughter and she began seeing a counselor near the end of May.
8.            I also sought counseling for my wife and I, but her conditions of cost were too great and we could not afford it. She refused to look for a job and help with any counseling expenses.
9.            In the past twenty years, my wife and I have had three arguments that my wife involved her sister in. With each of these three arguments, my wife and her sister would psychoanalyze me and determine psychological conditions I had. As I expected, when I checked the Sprint phone records from the prior several weeks I found out that my wife and her sister had spoken over 2,000 minutes with each other in this instance again. Little did I realize the full force of my wife's sister's interference forthcoming.
10.          On Monday, June 7, 2010, my wife informed me she was leaving and taking our daughter. I asked her where and she replied, "I don't have to tell you." I said, "I need to know where you're taking our daughter. She replied again, "I don't have to tell you."
11.          On Wednesday, June 9, 2010 my wife took our daughter from our home and did not return that night. My wife refused to tell me where our daughter was at. I attempted a number of times to call my daughter's cell phone and she did not answer.
12.          On Thursday, June 10, 2010 I again tried calling my daughter's cell phone and it remained unanswered. I called my wife requesting where our daughter was taken. My wife stated "You don't need to know."
13.          On Friday, June 11, 2010, my wife, after informing me that our daughter would be at swim practice, picked up our daughter from practice and took her home as her mother said she would be there.
14.          My daughter and I entered the house, where my wife and mother's sister (who flew in from Texas) were packing me and my wife's combined marital property. My wife's sister said they were just "sorting and cleaning things out that had not been used."
15.          I sat with my daughter watching TV, only to see her staring at the wall as we both heard the sound of packing and packing tape. I left as I could not bear to see my daughter exposed to this.
16.          That evening as our daughter was in the sole custody of my wife, my wife and her sister subjected our daughter to seeing the 31-year combined marital property of her parents transported by car to a storage location away from the home and father. I returned later that night finding that half of the marital property had been removed from the home. I changed the locks to prevent further removal as my wife would not tell me where our combined belongings were being taken to.
17.          On Saturday, June 12, 2010, my wife's sister returned and broke through a window of our home. Seeing I was home with my sister and her husband, she walked out of the house.
18.          After I called the police, the police arrived and called my wife to inform her she could return and take any personal property she needed.
19.          Within a half-hour, my wife and her sister returned, with our daughter, exposing her to four police cars in front of the house and a number of policemen in our home.
20.          My daughter was very upset and had been crying. My sister watched her as she went alone to her room, touching one item after another, yet not removing them. My sister said she appeared to be in shock.
21.          I went in to see my daughter and asked her where she was staying. My daughter looked down and replied very quietly, "I'm not allowed to tell you."
22.          I sat down with her, took her hands and told her as I knew my time was short, "DD, this is not your fault. You did nothing wrong. This property is all of ours, the way it was removed is not right, it will be done the right way. I love you, you have always been, and are, an amazing girl to me. I will see you again." And lastly I said, "Take care of your Mom, she has been a wonderful mother. This is not your fault." Before she left, she came and gave me a tight hug and told me she loved me. Then she was gone. Little did I know I would not see her for two months.
23.          On June 14, 2010, my daughter's counselor terminated her relationship in part as my wife continually cancelled our daughter's counseling sessions.
24.          On June 15, 2010, my wife took our daughter from Florida to Texas for what was, to our daughter, to be a two-week vacation. I had no knowledge my daughter would be removed from the state of Florida until receiving a message from my wife stating "We are on vacation in Texas."
25.          As my wife and her sister left Florida, they stopped at the bank where my wife and I shared a joint account and emptied out the remainder of the funds in the account and transferred the money to a joint account established by my wife and her sister 10 days earlier. The daughter was in the possession of my wife and most likely heard the discussion of the transaction between my wife and her Aunt.
26.          I was informed by my wife that I must call her cell phone to speak to our daughter, because our daughter's phone "had broken."
27.          I was also told by my wife that any email I was going to send to her that I must send to our daughter's email, in obvious reference that my daughter's email would no longer be private, that my wife would be checking my daughter's email account.
28.          Shortly after arriving in Texas, I was informed that my daughter's laptop had "broken" so she would not be able to use it to contact me anymore.
29.          While in Texas, our daughter in almost all instances was never able to directly answer the phone when I called. Our daughter would call me back 6 to 48 hours later.
30.          The email I would send to my daughter personally was exposed to other family members.
31.          I was removed from access to my daughter's Facebook wall.
32.          Our daughter's two-week vacation in Texas extended into two months. Our daughter was denied communication or access to all of her friends in Florida for at least the first month. This was told to me by DD's best friend's parents in front of me and my sisters.
33.          Our daughter was an accomplished Junior Olympic swimmer. After four years of effort and garnering her first Florida Junior Olympic time, she was, by being in Texas, denied by my wife the opportunity to attend and participate in the Florida Swimming Junior Olympics held in July that she had so very much earned.
34.          Our daughter was denied all communication from her Aunts on her father's side of the family the entire time she was in Texas.
35.          The parents of our daughter's closest friends in Florida also had no knowledge of our daughter's situation, but believed by the silence our daughter was never returning to Florida. Our daughter had wonderful friends in Florida. (See Exhibit A.) Her best friend had posted on her Facebook, "[My daughter's name], where are you? I miss you a little. No, okay, a lot."
36.          To improve communication, I bought new cell phones for both our daughter and my wife, especially as a birthday gift to our daughter. I told my daughter they were being shipped and our daughter was excited to be receiving them. However, upon arrival, my wife signed for them in my daughter's name and took them to the nearest post office and had them sent back to me. Access to my daughter remained extremely limited.
37.          I attempted to call my wife over 50 times in June and July of 2010, for a number of reasons. To determine what to do with our remaining property, discuss our pension, determine when our daughter would return. My wife never answered as I continually left voicemail. My wife never called me back. Up through the date of this motion, my wife refuses to communicate with me on any aspect of our daughter. I have not verbally spoken with my wife from June 12, 2010 until the present time, the date of this affidavit.
38.          When it became evident our daughter would have to return to Florida by my legal action, our daughter was then allowed to communicate with her Florida friends.
39.          While our daughter was allowed online video to speak with her friends in Florida, she was not allowed to do so with me.
40.          My daughter's phone and email started working again shortly after it was evident our daughter was going to have to return to Florida.
41.          Our daughter was returned to Florida on August 11, 2010 and missed the orientation all freshmen were strongly recommended to attend. At the orientation, the students collect all of their books and are oriented to many of the policies and procedures of  XX School of which our daughter was denied. Instead, I attended for our daughter.
42.          Our daughter had no supplies for school upon her return and they were purchased by me and my sisters.
43.          Our daughter had very little clothes returned from Texas and very little clothes at home when my wife and her sister removed them to the unknown storage facility. My sisters and I had to purchase school clothes for my daughter.
44.          In the fall of 2010, I was cleaning out my wife's email, that had not been used for months by my wife and remove her email address from the server. In cleaning it out, I found a number of Facebook emails from my older daughter to my wife and members of her family during the two months our daughter was taken to Texas. In one email, my older daughter who lives in Texas and after talking to my wife's sister said "This is why Mom and [younger daughter's name] were taken away from XX...to send him to hell."
45.          Both parents now share custody of our daughter, alternating every week.
46.          In the first week of January, 2011 I was to have DD according to the custody agreement. However, I received a message from her mother that they were in South Carolina, again on vacation.
47.          Our daughter, when with my wife, stays at an unknown location, having moved a number of times. My wife refuses to tell me where she moves her to. In January, 2011 when my wife moved, I asked by text where she was moving. My wife replied, "Your relationship is with your daughter, ask her." I will not ask my daughter, as I will not put her in a position of saying, "I'm not allowed to tell you" as she did on June 12, 2010. It appears she has again just moved recently.
48.          Before my daughter returned under Florida law, those on her side of the family told my sisters my wife has no intention of ever returning to Florida, as my wife in her own words expects "she and her daughter to be living in Texas."
49.          Our daughter, when with the Father, resides in her own room that has an attached entertainment room to have her friends over. The first room she could truly call her own room since June 9, 2010. It still is.
50.          In July, 2010, both my wife and I agreed to a Parental Evaluation and counseling for our daughter. I submitted 15 counselors to my wife. My wife refused to submit any counselors of her choice for our daughter. My wife cancelled the Parental Evaluation for her and my daughter.
51.          In February, 2011 the court ordered that both my wife and I submit our counselors of choice and agree to one. I submitted 15 counselors in the general location of where our daughter went to school. My wife submitted 3 counselors that would have required extensive travel far from school, at least 45 minutes, one way. I requested closer proximity. My wife submitted just one counselor who did not have the specific experience having to do with what our daughter needed and had less than two years experience. The 15 counselors I submitted had both the direct experiences in adolescent counseling and over 10 years of experience. My wife has rejected all of them.
52.          I was informed in February of 2011 that my daughter was staying at an extended stay hotel when with her mother, in a one-room hotel room.
53.          Through court documents, she has stated her family will financially support her. However, I faithfully pay alimony and custody support agreed to by both my wife and I in the amount of $1,200. Further, my wife refused to accept a pension option that would have paid her almost $1,400 per month beyond the alimony and support payments. To protect that pension to her, I had purchased a life insurance policy as my wife as beneficiary in the amount of $500,000. My wife asked for the pension fund address. She acquired those documents through the pension fund in October of 2010 to legally split and receive her share. To this date she has refused to submit a QDRO to the pension fund.
54.          At this time, my wife's parental plan requests that my daughter be allowed to attend school in Texas and fly out to visit her father once a month, 2 days per month. My daughter is terrified to fly. When she came back on August 11, 2010 from Texas, my wife's sister drove her to the Orlando Airport instead of her taking a plane. The Parental Plan my wife offers is not possible.
55.          It is my belief that whatever I do for the welfare and in the best interests of my daughter, my wife will do the opposite.
56.          Since my daughter's return from Texas, she does not actively involve herself in any extracurricular activity. My belief is that she is being constantly told by her mother and her mother's family that she will be "in Texas" before too long. Further, it is my belief that her mother will not encourage nor aid our daughter in being involved in any extracurricular activity while in Florida.
57.          At my wife's deposition, she finally admitted that she talks to our daughter "all the time" about moving to Texas.
58.          At trial, which is still continuing, my wife, her sister and my older daughter (one of four and the only one who testified) stated, for the first time, that our youngest daughter "is afraid of her father". There is no fear, we have a great relationship.

Kitty C.

I have taken the liberty of removing all identifying information from your post.  In the future, it is strongly recommended that any personal identifying information be left out.  In the places where your daughter's name was listed, I inserted 'DD', for "Darling Daughter'....one of our acronyms.

Also, it appears what you included in your post is what may have been submitted at some point to the courts.  It can be long and laborious to read such posts, so in the future if you could synopsize the points that you are trying to make, more people may be able to help.  If you find that you are not getting any responses, it might be beneficial to post on one of the main forums, as they can garner more readers than the state forums.

You should also keep in mind that 'the other side' has full opportunity to see what you've posted here, if they determine that you have come here seeking help.  You need to carefully consider how much information you want/need to post here, in the event that would occur.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog........if you can't play with it or eat it, pee on it and walk away.......