extra curriculars

[beadvendor]

My dh's ex girlfriend (they have a 14 yr old together) called up my dh demanding that he has to pay for sd cheerleading tuition. DH politely declined it is not written in the co that he has to pay for ec's also he is also paying a very good amount in cs. He is paying 1300 a month. Bmom also stated that she thinks we should pay for the whole thing. Bmom pretty much lives off of cs. She is also complaining that my daughter is doing cheerleading too, and my son is doing baseball but I am paying for them, she is pretty much saying if dh cannot pay I should pay for her daughters cheering.

[Kitty C.]

She can complain all she wants to........if it's not in the CO, he's not required to do it.  He wants to help pay for part of it just because he wants to, that's up to him.

'...she is pretty much saying if dh cannot pay I should pay for her daughters cheering.'

With a twisted mind like that, beware that she might tell SD that since Dad won't pay for it, she can't participate.  But Dad should remind BM that if paying for EC's is a problem, then she should petition the court for an adjustment of some type regarding the CS, like splitting the cost.  If that were to happen, Dad needs to make absolutely sure that he does NOT pay anything directly to the BM.  That he is not required to pay a portion without an invoice and an address he can pay directly to.

[ocean]

I agree...
First, do they have cheer in school for free? or a community program that does not cost as much as at a gym?
Legally, you do not have to pay anymore than court ordered. You can choose to send her to a different one/less expensive or tell child that when she gets to X grade they have it at school. If you do pay then pay the place directly and keep receipts.

As kitty said, she can try and bring it back to court to get extra's split between you too. Maybe offer 50% and you will pay the place directly especially if the child really wants to do it and you can afford it.

As far as they saying anything about the other kids in the family, try just to ignore or one time you can say "you have all the money for SD through the courts, it is your job to use the child support money AND your share to get what she needs. If it is really an issue, then we can switch custody", but really ignore...

[gemini3]

You don't have to pay.  I would just politely say no, and then put any further communication from her on this issue under "ignore".  Sounds like someone desperately wants attention.