Mother with custody moved away without informing father

[newstepmommy1710]

Hello, so my boyfriend's ex girlfriend that has custody over his son, recently told us that she was going on vacation during the weekend that he would get the son, but we have just found out through a mutual friend that the ex girlfriend moved away without telling anyone. She now lives over 8 hours away and my boyfriend is really worried that he won't be able to see his son anymore (she brings him over once every 2 weeks for the weekend only). He is very confused at what to do and if he took it to court, he doesn't think he could do full custody (mainly because he works most of the time and I live in a different town but offered to watch the son). My boyfriends mother and step-father suggested that we file a police report because many people have told them that it is kidnapping. We have taken pictures of them stating that they have moved and also have pictures of their new house, pictures of them for identification, and pictures of their license plates. Now for some background on the ex-girlfriend that has custody. She has been with many different men while having the child with her, also has constantly moved. I know this is a bad environment for a child to grow up in so that brings in the question as to where we believe my boyfriend is going to get custody. Would it be possible for us to bring the ex girlfriend to court and have it so she cannot move away and has to be within a certain distance of the father? Thanks for taking the time to read this!


Edit - We also believe that the mother may be trying to get the father out of the childs life, she has told the child multiple times that "Your father doesn't love you" (the child has told us she had said that) Also when the child has to leave our house, he often says how much he hates his mothers boyfriend because the boyfriend doesn't like the child.

[ocean]

How old is child? School age? How long ago was the move? Does he have anything through the courts now for visitation?

You BF would need to file in family court joint custody papers and possible emergency custody to bring child back to town you live in- almost a like a restraining order. (especially if child is school age he would have a better chance at this). Court would take place by him if he files NOW. You can hire a lawyer to do the paperwork, or call your local family court to find out where their intake office is (to file yourself). Some counties have the paperwork online.

It sounds like they do not have any paperwork through the courts so you would start a new case. He should ask for joint legal custody (for major issues, schooling or surgeries). Then ask for a parenting plan on when each parent has child. If you file the emergency order, a judge would make a decision quickly on if the child should be returned to hometown. If mom is allowed to move, find the local school calendar and find out when you can have child. Mom moved, so she would be responsible for travel costs.

Many lawyers will see you for an hour for free or less than $100. Go see one in your area ASAP. Ask how much they would charge to file paperwork for you. Ask if you do the leg work, drop off papers...how much it would be to represent you and if they will do payment plans. If not, ask questions on how you can file yourself, asking about the emergency restraining order to return child.

You have no legal right so everything must be done through your BF. He can have babysitters on his time just like when child is at mom's. Usually the local police will not get involved in family court orders (even if you have an order) and tell you to take it to family court. She is not kidnapping, as she is child's parent too and is allowed to move if your BF does not have an order stopping her move. Is this move out of state? Most orders state that child can not be moved xx miles. Ours states 30 miles, some state out of school district without both parents consent.

If child is in school, get records of withdrawal from last school, it will have contact info for new school. Then contact new school and get the records there. Will show address and phone and see if she put him down as father. This site has a great school letter as by federal law both parents can get access to school records regardless of custody issues.

[newstepmommy1710]

The child is 3 years old, starts school next year when he turns 4. The move was last week and we were just informed on Sunday by a mutual friend. My bf told me that they only went to court for child support for the mother so I'm not too sure if they ever discussed the visitation rights, although he does get to see the child every two weeks at the moment and this has been ongoing for 2 years.

Edit- They are still in state, just over 8 hours away from where we live. (we live on Long Island and they moved about 2 hours away from Buffalo.)

[ocean]

Going to send you private message on here in few minutes...