3rd party seeking custody, need advice

[gmad]

Thsi is gonna be a little long so I apologize in advance:

This began right at 2 years ago.  My daughter(dd) was having serious problems with her now exh, enough so that I (mgm) and my sis (mga) were concerned for her daugher(dgd).  DD agreed that I and mga would have shared custody of dgd until my dd was better able to provide for dgd.  As I was going to school full time and working full time and mga was a stay at home mom of 1 it was agreed that she was in the best position to provide a stable environment. This is complicated by me and mga being 2 hours apart.

Two months later dd was able to leave and move back home with me and we believed that after she secured a job and worked a couple more months she would be able to get her own place and dgd would go back to her.

unfortunately we found out dd was pregnant and that meant no job.  she was sick through much of the pregnance but delievered a healthy boy (dgs2).

because she does not drive (yet) it has taken a while for  her to secure employment but she is now working and plans to take her driver's test next week.

However, now she has recieved custody papers from mga and I am also named as a defendant. I am livid. what was meant to be a help to her is now hurting both her and dgd.

there are lots of issues but I was wondering if anyone else had dealt with anything similar...someone other than grandparents involved. And what to do next.  I have not yet been served, I'm going tonight to get a copy of papers from dd.

I know as defendants we have 30 days to answer the complaint but do we answer it together or seperately? I finished school in may and have been in orientation for my new job this week so I am in a much better position to help my daughter out and she has been wonderful with dgs2 and greatly misses dgd. mga will not return her calls when dd tries to call to speak with dgd.

The agreement she signed was for gaurdianship and was not court ordered custody.  What do you think the chances of her going to retrieve her daughter are? I am just not sure how cooperative the sherriff's department would be since there is a complaint filed...or if that even matters.

I am so mad I could....never mind...I just dont understand how or why mga would do such a thing. Anyway I'm open to comment or suggestions.  Sorry so long and hope you can understand all this.  It's never easy is it?

D

[mistoffolees]

There are two issues.

1. What is the current status? Is there any court order in effect at this moment? If there is no court order, then she, as the mother is free to retrieve her daughter at any time. If she wanted to make trouble, if mga doesn't release the daughter to her, she could probably charge her with kidnapping, but I'm not sure about that.

2. Then you have to worry about what is going to happen longer term. In general, the court wll favor biological parents over more distant relatives unless there's some other factor involved. Depending on how long the child(ren) has(ve) been with mga, that might make it more complicated.

Either way, she needs to see an attorney who is familiar with the situation and can give you advice.

[gmad]

Presently there is no court order in effect, only a written agreement for gaurdianship.  It was understood from the very get go that this was to be a temporary arrangement.

We do not want dgd to be upset by this and that is the only reason dd has not gone to retrieve dgd immediately. We had thought it best to check with an attorney within the area of jurisdiction first.

dgd has been with mga since a little over 2 years.  during that time dd has visited her when mga brought her down to visit. As i said, dd does not drive so it is an extreme hardship for dd to try to go to mga's to visit.  she does try to call but for the past two months no one answers nor does she get her calls returned.

As with most cases there are multiple factors but none that I can see would be deemed as making her unfit.  If that were true then dgs2 would have been removed from her care after mga made a complaint to CPS saying she was afraid dgs2 was being neglected and that dd was "unstable" - both this allegations were refuted by the psychologist that evaluated dd and the socialworker who made home visits several times.

Now what about my part in this?  I am also named as a defendant but I have not personally been served.  Will I be?  And do we reply together in one answer to the complaint  or do we respond seperately?

Thanks for your help.

D

[MixedBag]

I am not an attorney.

But I would reply separately.

In your reply, I would answer that I am not the mother, therefore, I have no legal obligation for this child.  Sounds harsh, but that's the way it is.

Does the guardianship agreement have the word "temporary" in it?

and has Mom been with her daughter lately?

Yes, I'd get an attorney ASAP and go get the daughter.

Where's the dad in all of this?

[gmad]

No the agreement does not explicitly have the word "temporary" in it.  It was well understood by all parties as well as others that it was meant to be temporary.

As for dad....not in the picture at all, and has not been from child's birth. Has never seen dgd and doesn't call or support her.

If mga is using this agreement to substantiate her claim then I would have as much obligation as one of her legal gaurdians.

My personal feelings....  I don't think that remaining with mga is in child's best interest because mga will not foster a relationship with dd and child and has actively sought to thwart contact.

DD was with dgd each time mga brought her down except now she won't bring her down and as dd has no transportation all that has been left for her is to try to call...mga is not answering phone or returning messages to call (we have call records of all attempts to contact over past three months when mga stopped coming down)  DD did arrange to go to dgd's dance recital and was going to see her after the dance but mga left immediately and would not answer phone or let dd see dgd.