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FIling for full custody by way of Child abandonment

Started by Amarant01, Aug 06, 2017, 12:05:47 PM

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Hello All,

I live in Virginia, and My child's mother and I share physical and legal custody of our child, this has been the case for the past 5 years.  Recently there was a child support case, that didn't necessarily go in her favor, and she began to mistreat our child as results.  I wont delve into specifics about that at the moment, but it was enough to have CPS involved, in which my child was removed from her home for some time.  Upon conclusion of the case, my child was allowed to return to her, in which she only stayed 3 days before the mother contacted my mom, to have my mom keep her grandchild, because of a babysitting/work scheduling issue.  A week after, I texted her to see if she had straightened out her situation, to the same result, that she was still working out her situation.  It has been six months since this, there has been no contact initiated by the mother, she has made no attempt to interact with her child, or support her child in any form or fashion, not to mention she resides 3 minutes up the street from my mother's residence, and working only a limited capacity, less than 20 hours a week, and having ample time to do so.  It may be worthy to mention that she has a younger child that isn't mine, and would obviously, and more appropriately require childcare/supervision for that child as well, it makes no sense to me to not have childcare/supervision for my child.  The child abandonment law in Virginia indicates that "intent to abandon a child" occurs when the child is left and no support is given for more than 30 days.  My question, is if anyone has any insight towards the prospect of securing Primary/Full custody in this matter?  I already have a stable home and a support system, I handle all of my child's appointments and extracurricular activities, as well as the costs and funding for such, and my relationship with my child is great.  I've spoken with a couple of attorneys in the matter, but I cant get a definite idea of how to approach the matter.  Any insight would be appreciated.


Little confused....do you live with your mother and child?
You can go to the family court you went to last time and file for sole custody as mother has no contact for 6 months. You can also file for enforcement of child support and the state will go after her for the money and threaten to take her driver's license and more if she does not pay. The state will do this for you if you file for them to enforce the order.
It would be best if you lived with child as grandparents do not have many rights in most states. So get your ducks in a row and then go file.
How old is child? Some people just let things play out, if you take her to court she may demand to see child again when right now it is quiet. Since she has not seen child for this long , if she demands to see child, you can file for temp emergency  custody and see a judge that day and say mother has not been around since xxx and she is not threatening to come take child. Bring all documents you have when you file (all court orders and child birth certificate).
Good luck.


No, I have my own place, and my will be 10 in a few days.


If you are asking for full custody then child would need to live with you. Grandparents really do not have any rights over parents especially mothers so be careful here. Can you move in with them or can child move to you? You should probably wait until you have child living with you. If you file now, mom can ask for custody back from grandma ....Also wait for school to start back....judges don't like to pull a child from school if mom lives in different school zone then you/grandma.
10 year olds have some say in court but usually age 12ish is when judges really listen to them. If need be, a GAL will be assigned to your child to be your child's lawyer so the child has a say in court.


my child doesnt live with the grandparents, there was a dual residency established when the shared custody was agreed upon. Until that point six months ago, my child lived with me and the mother, now my child has only been living with me.  The grandmother was asked to keep her by the mother, but my child is living with me