I cannot believe this happened...

[stepmomfor2]

>It was 8:05pm I had only been on the phone with my two children for
>20 mins which part of that was me helping with homework.
>
>

I'm sure you didn't do anything wrong.  Although I wouldn't hang up the phone, if I'm waiting on the skids, or we're going somewhere, I have been known to tell skids to say good-bye.

My DH is CP, so I'm full-time SM.  BM does not have visitation but has liberal phone contact.  One night BM called around 8:00 p.m. asking to speak to SD11.  I said sure, but please only for a few minutes.  I told BM that SD11  needed to finish her homework and finish getting ready for school (we pick out clothes and pack backpacks at night).  Anyway BM said OK (knowing SD11 and SS8 go to bed at 8:30 on school nights).  BM kept SD11 on the phone 45 minutes!  I was ticked that BM agreed but then disregarded my request, and I told SD11 it was time for bed.   BM still keeps her on the phone a few more minutes!  

Needless to say, BM didn't respect my request, so no more phone calls after 8:00 p.m.

[xyz1]

I can totally understand you being upset. I would not go against SM's rules in their home. I might not always like them but I still make sure I tell the children to follow them (and I never tell the children I don't like the rules). When I heard her yelling and carrying on in the background, I told my child...well guess it's time to go now...

Sorry your BM isn't more understanding about making it work with two households. It's ones like that...that give good ones a bad name.

[stepmomfor2]

I forgot to mention that our BM is evil, vindictive, and uses PAS, even to this day.  

As in the beginning, I still believe every word she says, and still cannot believe that she can't be civil, tell the truth, and do it for the skids.  DH and BM absolutely will not talk to each other; she yells and curses at him every single time, no matter what they talk about.  

I don't have any bios, but I would not like to hear SM yelling at my kids and then be hung up on.  I think your SM sounds insecure which probably gets worse as she listens to the conversation.  I've had to learn to leave them alone to talk; skids shouldn't be hearing both moms at once!  

[xyz1]

"I don't have any bios, but I would not like to hear SM yelling at my kids and then be hung up on."

That statement made me think...

I wonder how much my children's SM would flip out totally if her son's SM did that to her??? She would have the Dad in court so quick his head would spin...but yet it's okay for her to do that to me.

I have a strong belief that I live my life by...what goes around comes around.

I have just sat back and watched life and people...you see someone do something rotten to you or someone...you don't do anything hateful back...just sit and watch...cause down the road...they end up paying for their hatefulness and you don't have anything to do with it at all. You cannot run around being hateful without life knocking you for it...might not be right away but it will come.

I personally think it is God's doing...not life...but I know alot of people do not have the same beliefs I do...so I say life.

[backwardsbike]

I am a NCM.  I have been for the lst five years.  I would trade any of you for the SM I deal with.  This woman has mocked me loud enough for me to hear while I am speaking to my children.  I get only one word answers from my kids when I do call cause both Dad and SM hate to hear them talk to me.  SM is prone to migrains and tells the kids to hang up cause she has a migraine and thier talking to me aggravates it.  My DD loves my two younger custodial kids so much, yet when she talks aboutthem in her dad's custody she gets punished if she talks about them "too much".  But no one will tell her when it is too much.  She just gets grounded after the fact.

I have considered getting my kids cell phones.  We even tried it out by buying a cheap trac phone at a garage sale.  It came with ten minutes.  When the time ran out her dad purchased her more minutes for her birthday.  I thought, " Good..they will be cool with it."  That night DD called me and sasy, " dad bought me more moinutes for the trac phone and I wanted to call you so you'd have the number."  Funny...the phone hasn't been inservice since.  When I asked DD about it she said, " Oh, the battery died adn I never recharged it."  Ihave difficulty beleiving this as she talked about wanting this darn phone all summer.

Now I understand that thier dad is buying the cell phones.  Of course we are ehaded to court and they can't get them til after that.  I'll bet hell will freeze over before I get to speak to them on the phones...if he ever fallows thru with getting them in the first place.

Bravo to all of you for trying to make it work and for keeping the  kids needs foremost in your minds and hearts.  To the orginal poster...just one word of adivice.  Set your limits with that SM to be real soon casue she sounds like she could be big trouble.  Take that from someone whose been there-done that.  

[xyz1]

I am so sorry you have to go thru all of that...it must totally break your heart. Good luck with the court (what are you going back for contempt, modification etc??) and please let me know what the outcome is.

Thanks for the heads up on my issue...