Visitation, custodial parent issues

[just a mother]

I have been on both sides. Custodial parent with problems of not recieving court ordered child support. If a custodial parent doesn't use their income and resources for their child's benefit it is called neglect. Probable jail time if charged. But if non custodial parent fails to pay child support, it is called contempt of court- sentence suspended.

Visitation- if a non custodial parent fails to return a child to the custodial parent or violates the custodial order in any way without the custodial parents permission, it is a criminal matter. If a custodial parent refuses to allow visitation to a non-custodial parent, it is a civil matter and no one will force the visitation. If it goes to court, again- contempt of court- suspended. (I call it state sanctioned kidnapping).

My son has alleged that his stepmother has abused him (choking, slapping), but he refused to talk to authorities, he thought it would get him in more trouble and he has  been told that it would be dismissed as "discipline" for a teen. Son has been in counseling,  but father elected to pull him out, saying that he wanted to get counseling elsewhere. Counselor recommended son stay in counseling somewhere. Son absent from school 20 days last year, and so far 13 days this year. Continually fails to turn in homework. He turned 14 years old Tues.

Father has attempted to block my communication with the school, so past schools have been very hesitant in the info they give me.

In the past, son has indicated that he got disapproving looks and sent to his room after I have called. Then he told me a year ago that he wanted to go a year without seeing me. When I try to call the house- no answer. He has cut off all communication with his sister and his grandmother. He is also not complying with a visitation order with the grandmother, on the father's orders.

I don't have the funds for endless court battles and attorneys. And to be honest, I think it is pretty useless anyway in my county. The court system just wants it to go away.

I have checked about mediation in my court system. They don't have it. I don't know what to do, and I am afraid that there is nothing I can do.

[MixedBag]

Mediation is not the answer.

Don't know what it would be called, but contact agencies that deal with domestic violence and children.

[just a mother]

It' s a very rural county. Domestic violence agency is not very active, services they provide are very limited. More or less all they do is provide assistance in getting people from this county into a shelter in a neighboring county. I talked to them a while back, asking them to go to court with me when we went to court over custody. There is a past history of domestic violence with the father. They don't do anything like that.