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mother wishes to hold daughter back a grade

Started by antonin, Apr 01, 2004, 09:18:05 PM

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antonin

You know my story. It's not about custody this time. A new wrinkle.        
 
My ex filed for divorce in 9-01. She moved 65 miles away. She enrolled daughter in a rural school district with one of the lowest state scores in MI. Daughter was scheduled to start first grade in a Montessori school.  She has attended Montessori pre-school and kindergarten for 3 years in preparation for this. That of course did not happen.

During the 2002  FOC evaluation, I stressed the fact that daughter would do better in school district where I lived or in the Montessori school: this fell on deaf ears. I have had 50/50 custody of my daughter since Oct. 03. I moved 65 miles to where daughter lives and commute 130 mi RT each day to work. I have tried and tried to help her, but I believe two years of this rural school system retarded her academic development along with two years of mother neglecting to help her with schoolwork, etc. Additionally, during daughter's 1st and 2nd grades, mother took her to work with her each and every day.

Mother was a nanny and had to take care of two demanding kids as well as a crippled woman. Mother had no time to spend with daughter to develop study habits, etc. Daughter went to work with mother and came home at 8:30 PM. This was before I had 50/50 and was relegated to the role of a weekend parent. I went to parent-teacher conferences tonight.  

My daughter is about 30% below grade level, especially in math. I found out through the teacher (mother attended a separate conference earlier in the evening) that mother wishes to hold daughter back a grade. Daughter is in third grade. Mother says daughter has been struggling since first grade.

Daughter can and will pass third grade: it is the mother's desire to hold her back, not mandated by the teacher or the school.
I believe Mother does not have a sufficient understanding how a child is educated or how they learn. I have several degrees in education, and have taught for 30 years.  

My plan is to enroll daughter in a Kumon or Sylvan center and see where she is at at end of summer.  Additionally there is a "Jump Start" program offered by the school for "struggling third graders" that starts April 21st. Mother has agreed with me that daughter should attend. It is basically "Spring and Summer School."

I have joint physical (50/50) and joint legal.

1. If the mother still insists on holding the daughter back a grade in August, what legal recourse have I? (Again..the teacher has stated that my daughter can pass can and will pass third grade...she is just below grade level. The mother wants to hold her back...not the school.

Thanks you for any insight you may provide.

socrateaser

>1. If the mother still insists on holding the daughter back a
>grade in August, what legal recourse have I? (Again..the
>teacher has stated that my daughter can pass can and will pass
>third grade...she is just below grade level. The mother wants to
>hold her back...not the school.

You're the expert on education issues. As far as I'm aware, a parent cannot force the school to hold the child back -- it's up to the school. If the kid passes, then she passes -- end of discussion.

What am I missing here?