Letter to GAL

[NeverGiveUp]

SOC, can you critique this letter for me?


Ms GAL,

Over the past several months I have been trying to establish a co-parenting relationship with my ex-wife, X, in order that our children might benefit. It seems that X and I have reached an impasse with respect to several issues and I feel there is no recourse but to request intervention.  I have enclosed all of our correspondence exchanged over the past several months.  It's not my intention to burden you with documents however not providing all information might be misleading.  

Our current custody order is lacking in detail and negotiations with respect to special events, holidays, and visitation times are difficult at best. In many cases Child 1 and Child 2 are being asked to make decisions that should be handled by X and me.  Both Child 1 and Child 2 have expressed their desire to be excluded from this decision making. Therefore, moving forward I would like to request revisions and additions to our custody order.  I believe that a clear, concise, well defined schedule would be in our children's best interest and would reduce the level of conflict between X and me.

Also, our daughter Child 1 has been struggling at school and X and I have different opinions as to the root cause of her struggles as well as the approach for helping Child 1.  I have been in contact with Child 1's school psychologist, Dr. Bento, and counselor, Mr. Guidance Counselor.  Tri-annual testing has indicated that Child 1 is suffering from a learning disability.  I have worked with Dr. School Sych and Child 1 to ensure that testing would take place and that Child 1 would gain an understanding of the struggles she's facing.  I am particularly sensitive to Child 1's disability because I too struggled with a learning disability. Considering my sensitivity to this issue, I think Child 1 would benefit from more contact with me.  

Sine the last time we spoke I have attended the court ordered therapy with Therapist and have signed a release form so you may contact her.  On several occasions I have allowed Ms. Therapist to read correspondence between X and myself to ensure that I am acting in the interest of our children. Yet in a certified letter X requested that I not email her more than once or twice per month.  I find it impossible to appropriately parent our children on such limited communication.

I have also established a second home for Child 1 and Child 2 and encouraged them to help personalize it.  They each have their own bedrooms that they helped decorate and furnish.  They have told their friends about our home, had them to visit and sleep over. They are extremely happy there.  I welcome you to visit us at anytime so that you might see for yourself how comfortable they've become.

I would like to schedule some time with you within the next few weeks so we can discuss this in more detail. I realize that your schedule is busy but I fear disagreements between X and me are causing Child 1 and Child 2 a great deal of unnecessary setbacks.

Attachments:
• Written communications between X and I
• Copy of release form for Ms. Therapist
• A suggestion for a comprehensive visitation plan that I have discussed with Ms Therapist, taking into consideration Child 1 and Child 2's dispositions and concerns.
• A parenting plan that I believe would alleviate much of the discourse between X and me and allow for a relaxed environment for Child 1 and Child 2.  Specifically a clause agreeing to mediation whenever agreement can not be reached.

[socrateaser]

Letter seems ok to me. But, do you have a custody hearing pending?

[NeverGiveUp]

No, that kind of threw me as well.  My att asked me to send a letter to the GAL first, asking for a meeting to discuss a "better defined" custody order and why the current one is not working. Currently there is nothing regarding holidays, summer, b-days, special events.  Hard to live by when there's no flexibility. My att feels that I should be able to communicate with the GAL whenever necessary and keep her in the loop instead of going past her. Either that or he wants to make sure he has a case before he pushes.  Maybe he's more concerned with his image . . .

Is the approach wrong?

[socrateaser]

Seems to me that if there's no case pending then the GAL is no longer the appointed representative of the child's interests. How do you know that, if a new hearing is needed, that the court will appoint the same person. The judge may conclude that your ex-parte communications with the GAL render any future decisions biased.

Seems weird to me, unless the objective IS to get this GAL disqualified from any future hearings, or unless your attorney is merely looking for a sounding board. I can't imagine why the GAL would even correspond with you unless you are prepared to pay for new services rendered.

[NeverGiveUp]

The GAL was appointed by the judge for a periode of one year as of last December when I was fighting a TRO.  There is no case pending right now though.

This is why I could never be an att.  There's no way I could keep this all straight.  

What you're saying makes sense to me.  If there's no case then what's the GAL representing them for?  These are the times I second guess my att.  

Do you think I should talk to another att?

[socrateaser]

If the TRO is still in force, then there IS a case still pending. Otherwise, if the court rendered final judgment on all of the issues and either dissolved the TRO or maintained it as a permanent injunction, then no case is pending.

Technically, if the GAL never filed a motion to withdraw representation, then he/she does still represent the kids, but practically speaking, if no one's paying the bill, then the GAL isn't gonna do any work.