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Question custody order...

Started by United, Nov 11, 2004, 07:58:53 PM

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United

Soc, on the off chance you may feel the urge to check your messages...
a question for you.

Dad had primary physical custody granted (joint legal) with an order to return in 3 months to "see how things are going".  The impression everyone got was that the judge may keep things the same or go back to 50/50 based on how the kids were doing.  Dad getting custody was based on the mediators report.  Mom fought it to trial.

My questions are these:

In your experience, when a judge grants a custody change on a temporary basis what types of change is he looking for that would lead to a decision to return to a previous custody timeshare (which was 50/50)?

Have you seen this done and what was the order upon return?

Thanks for

socrateaser

>In your experience, when a judge grants a custody change on a
>temporary basis what types of change is he looking for that
>would lead to a decision to return to a previous custody
>timeshare (which was 50/50)?

Evidently, the evidence is pretty much dead even. Once there's a change of 90 days, a new status quo is established, and I would imagine that the judge would be reluctant to return to 50/50. It could be that the judge wants to ease the mom into the new situation, but that if there's a rebellion amongst the children, then that would argue for a return to 50/50.

I'd need to read the mediation report. There's something unusual afoot.

>
>Have you seen this done and what was the order upon return?

Never seen it -- hope I never do.

United

>Evidently, the evidence is pretty much dead even. Once there's
>a change of 90 days, a new status quo is established, and I
>would imagine that the judge would be reluctant to return to
>50/50. It could be that the judge wants to ease the mom into
>the new situation, but that if there's a rebellion amongst the
>children, then that would argue for a return to 50/50.
>
>I'd need to read the mediation report. There's something
>unusual afoot.  

I agree it seemed unusual.  On the stand mom claimed that the kids would be "destroyed" if dad got custody.  She also stated that the kids were "bawling their eyes out because they didn't want to be away from her" and the mediator stated she seemed literally stunned when she learned that fathers can be, and are, granted custody.

I hope you are correct and this is an attempt to ease mom into the idea without issue.  The only issues we've had since the judgement haven't come from the kids.  They have been mom raging, crying and cursing at dad in front of kids.  Should be interesting how this goes over when we reconveen.  

Thanks for your two cents! ; )

InTheMiddle

"The only issues we've had since the judgement haven't come from the kids. They have been mom raging, crying and cursing at dad in front of kids. "

Do you have a video tape recorder?  If not, spend the $500 to get one and record her everytime she comes to your house.  It's amazing how civilized people act when they know they are being videotaped.  And you can show these to the judge.

Get yourself a telephone tape recorder.  They costs around $100.  You can set it up to record anytime the handset is picked up.  

Our AZ lawyer said that the conversations between BM and the kids are not immessible in court, but are at a therapist, psychologist, or even in mediation.  The conversations between your DH and BM are allowed in court if your DH agrees to the tapes.

I have a BM like yours, too.  It's amazing how putting $600 on my credit card has taken alot of stress out of my life.

I don't take any credit for these suggestions, for I have found them on this board.  THANK YOU SOCRATEASER!!!