Separation Agreement

[TPK]

Soc,

Still trying to explain to wife this separation agreement.  I have addressed these topics in a rough draft of what should be in the SA.

Visitation-slight change to Fri-Sun every other weekend.
Custody- I'm giving her custodial but must be joint-legal
Marital property- Nothing to whack up
Child support- keeping the status quo

I intentionally left out alimony cuz I don't believe she's entitled to it based on duration (13 months) and needs. She has no mortage, no car payment and doesn't even live at her home. Her bank accounts dwarf mine as you know.

1. Have I left anything out that you think I should address?

2. Should I include in visitations any holidays I want?

3. If I leave anything out of agreement and at the end of 1 year when someone files for divorce am I SOL if I want to add anything?

Any other insights are welcomed.

Cheers

TPK

[socrateaser]

>1. Have I left anything out that you think I should address?

I prefer text like: "Parents shall have joint physical and legal custody over the minor child (never use the word visitation), subject to the conditions stated in the attached parenting plan (which should be specified down to a nat's ass)."

"Neither parent shall relocate the child's primary residence except upon 30 days written notice to the other parent, and any additional costs incident to a parent's exercise of custody, incurred as the result of such a move, shall be born entirely by the moving parent, and shall be credited to or deducted from the support obligor parent's instant child support obligation, as appropriate."


>2. Should I include in visitations any holidays I want?

See above.

>
>3. If I leave anything out of agreement and at the end of 1
>year when someone files for divorce am I SOL if I want to add
>anything?

That's a specific NY law question that I can't answer. You could put text in the agreement to either make any modification at the end of the year impossible/possible/conditioned, etc., but doing so has risks and benefits, as you may be happy with the situation and the other person may not.

I am concerned that you say that your wife doesn't understand what a separation agreement is. I suggest that you are giving her far too little credit, and that she may be deliberately stalling in order to create a more compelling case for sole custody/spousal support/etc.

You need to have her shit or get off the pot. If that means accusing her of some fault based action and trying it in court, in order to encourage her to settle, then so be it.

[TPK]

.
>
>I am concerned that you say that your wife doesn't understand
>what a separation agreement is. I suggest that you are giving
>her far too little credit, and that she may be deliberately
>stalling in order to create a more compelling case for sole
>custody/spousal support/etc.


She honestly doesn't know what it is. Unlike me, she has not read up on divorce law, separations etc. Rather she is just listening to her attorney who is no doubt running up her legal bills. She is just "spacey" right now, she's got problems. She has our daughter and that's all she cares about.

This might sound shitty but I'm actually trying to get her to do the SA while telling her maybe we can work things out. If I can lock her into the SA then after 1 year I'm filing for divorce and washing my hands of this.

She has hinted at getting back together so I'm probably giving her false hope but with me having virtually no chance at custody and not wanting to give her even a nickel in alimony, I feel this is my best angle.

This is how I want to play the game.


Thanks Soc

Cheers

TPK

[socrateaser]

>She has hinted at getting back together so I'm probably giving
>her false hope but with me having virtually no chance at
>custody and not wanting to give her even a nickel in alimony,
>I feel this is my best angle.
>
>This is how I want to play the game.
>
Hey, whatever works.