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help- 40 days have not spoken to my children - help

Started by NEMOM, Sep 18, 2006, 08:49:13 PM

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NEMOM

My former husband filed an ex-parte filing Aug. 14th based on lies and was granted temp sole custody.  I have not seen nor talked to my children since then.  I have always been the primary caregiver, he has even been to jail for non-payment of child support in 2003.  I am in litigation and have a hearing in 2 days but have no idea what to expect after the last time.  

The temp order said the children could visit and call me BUT I could not call them or initiate any contact, so he has not had them call me at all.  My house has been broken into since this twice with only their items missings but the police do nothing.

He also filed erroneous criminal threatening charges against me saying I hit his car, help me please...

socrateaser

>My former husband filed an ex-parte filing Aug. 14th based on
>lies and was granted temp sole custody.  I have not seen nor
>talked to my children since then.  I have always been the
>primary caregiver, he has even been to jail for non-payment of
>child support in 2003.  I am in litigation and have a hearing
>in 2 days but have no idea what to expect after the last time.
>
>
>The temp order said the children could visit and call me BUT I
>could not call them or initiate any contact, so he has not had
>them call me at all.  My house has been broken into since this
>twice with only their items missings but the police do
>nothing.
>
>He also filed erroneous criminal threatening charges against
>me saying I hit his car, help me please...

Since you are not revealing what was alleged in the ex parte pleading, I can't comment, other than to suggest (1) that you hire an attorney to represent you at the hearing, and (2) that if you can look at the allegations upon which the ex parte pleading is based, and you can say unhesitatingly that each and every one is false, then you should offer to submit to a polygraph on each allegation, as evidence of your truthfulness, in return for the other parent doing similarly.

If the other parent is represented by counsel, he/she will object, however, the judge will wonder why you are so willing to put yourself in a position where any falisty would be discovered, while the other parent is not.

This could cause the judge to toss out the order, or at least appoint a minor's counsel to assess the child(ren)'s best interests and report back to the court.

NEMOM

His petition for the ex-parte was based on him reporting erroneous facts from the previous day when we had an altercation, this trial has not been heard.

At the ex-parte the judge denied my right to a 5 day hearing.

Until now I have had sole custody, since 2002.  My ex has been in contempt 3 times and been incarcerated for a short time due to back support. He has also had 3 child protective c/o against him in the past but alo were closed unfounded (I didn't file these)

Tomorrow is our 1st hearing since my intial hearing (ex-parte)

I have an attorney but the judge/court seems to have combined all the cases : my ex in contempt of support, the ex-parte, and a custody hearing.  We want everything reversed, however also a guardian ad litum assigned if needed.

But now with no contact with m children and my former spouse having influence I am not sure of what anyone will say.  Also being a work day my witnesses are limited to family and no evals have been done as I have no contact.

Thank you for your help, at least others are out there.

socrateaser

>His petition for the ex-parte was based on him reporting
>erroneous facts from the previous day when we had an
>altercation, this trial has not been heard.
>
>At the ex-parte the judge denied my right to a 5 day hearing.
>
>Until now I have had sole custody, since 2002.  My ex has been
>in contempt 3 times and been incarcerated for a short time due
>to back support. He has also had 3 child protective c/o
>against him in the past but alo were closed unfounded (I
>didn't file these)
>
>Tomorrow is our 1st hearing since my intial hearing
>(ex-parte)
>
>I have an attorney but the judge/court seems to have combined
>all the cases : my ex in contempt of support, the ex-parte,
>and a custody hearing.  We want everything reversed, however
>also a guardian ad litum assigned if needed.
>
>But now with no contact with m children and my former spouse
>having influence I am not sure of what anyone will say.  Also
>being a work day my witnesses are limited to family and no
>evals have been done as I have no contact.
>
>Thank you for your help, at least others are out there.

You still haven't actually stated what he has alleged or how you would respond to it. "Erroneous facts" is your opinion. Apparently, the judge viewed the other parent's declaration/affidavit as credible, or he wouldn't have issued the restraining order.

You need to remove yourself from the emotion of the moment and try and be the judge. If you can't prove that the allegations are false or at least not tending to be true, then the judge will determine them to be true and you will lose.

But, I don't know what you're being accused of or how you plan to respond, so I can't comment with any specific advice, other than what Ive already suggested.

NEMOM

He alleges that I hit his car and attempted to again hit him in his car, whereas we did have a bumper touch each other when we parked to exchange the kids but no more, he then also assaulted me and physcially forced the keys from my ignition.

I understand our views are different, however since they are separate courts and cases I need to be careful as to how to respond to any ?'s pertaining to that incident.  I also have a different attorney for the alledged car incident.

I can say that his interpretation of the events are totally opposite of mine, that we have had a tumultuous relationship and that his support, $$ and otherwise have been limited.  

I am willing to tell the truth, however that is 1/3 of this hearing we believe.  Would a guardian ad litum be useful to this case as the other judge did not assign one?  I am worried about the children emotionally and would like for them to get counseling too.  Can I request this if no custody changes are made tomorrow?  And in the meantime can the judge order mandatory visitation with my children as it was allowed but was dependent on my ex scheduling?

  In regards to the ex-parte, my lawyer could not attend, a substitute attorney came, he objected to a same day/moment hearing and was denied.  I had met the attorney 5 minutes prior to the ex-parte and generally a temp order is issued and then a 5 day hearing.