S.P.A.R.C.

Separated Parenting Access & Resource Center
crazy gamesriddles and jokesfunny picturesdeath psychic!mad triviafunny & odd!pregnancy testshape testwin custodyrecipes

Author Topic: NJ family laws  (Read 6105 times)

Al1971

  • New Arrival
  • *
  • Posts: 2
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
NJ family laws
« on: Nov 26, 2007, 09:29:33 AM »
Hi,

I heard - also reading this forum - that New Jersey has a quite unfair legislation to the NCP, compared to the majority of other States.
I also heard a former female governor was the promoter of this legislation.
Do you have more information about this? Thanks.



cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
NJ Stinks
« Reply #1 on: Nov 27, 2007, 09:32:45 AM »
but I don't think that it is necessarily unfair to the NCP.  I think that it's unfair to the person who is trying to do right by the children (sometimes it's the NCP and sometimes it's the CP).

I don't know if it has anything to do with former governor Whitman, but I am a CP and NJ does nothing to get my daughter the child support that is owed to her even though there is an active child support order in place.

What kind of info are you looking for?

babyfat

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 70
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: NJ family laws
« Reply #2 on: Nov 29, 2007, 07:04:34 AM »
My sister lives in NJ and her husband has 3 children with his ex. The laws there are not fair to NCP's he has to pay child support to his ex for a child that is over 18 graduated HS and is not in college and has a job. The 18 year old also does not really live with his mother he lives with his girlfriends mother. they receintly went to court for a child support modification and he was still required to support simply because "he intends to go to college" in January. They also did not reduce support when my sister had a child. What I thought was particularly funny was that when they had custody of the older son they only reduced the payment by the amount he was to pay her for support and she was not required to pay a dime he was responcible for 100% cost of the child including after school activities. (he has always paid for all 3 of the kids after school activities plus they buy all the clothing) They ex even tried at one point to get him to pay for the 18 year olds car insurance and that one at least didn't fly.

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
I am very surprised.
« Reply #3 on: Nov 29, 2007, 07:43:03 AM »
If the child is not going to school now, your sister's husband shouldn't be paying CS.  Does the child HAVE to provide proof that he is enrolling in school in January.  I hope so!

As far as the child support not getting reduced when he fathered another child, I'm not sure why they didn't reduce it.  My ex gets his CS everytime he fathers another child (even though he doesn't support his new children either).

NJ is never fair to the person that is trying to do what's right for the child (whether it's the NCP or the CP).

My ex has 7 children and he doesn't support ANY of them!  NJ does nothing about it!  They just keep telling me "you can't get blood from a stone".  Yet...he walks around in designer clothing while our daughter and I walk around in clothes from Walmart.  Something is just not right!

Good luck to your sister's husband!


babyfat

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 70
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: I am very surprised.
« Reply #4 on: Dec 01, 2007, 03:51:39 PM »
What do they mean "You can't get blood from a stone" if this man  "walks around in designer clothing" then he must have a job can't they take his income tax? Every person I know that owed back cs had thier refunds taken. My boyfriend has his cs taken right out of his check every week and that was the way it was set up from day one.

As for my sister's case he will probably be stuck paying childsupport till the kid is 21 there seems to be no hope in site and he is a "nice guy" and probably won't make a stink out of it like he should. My sister says the step son says he is going to college in Jan but probably isn't because he keeps screwing around with the F/A forms and still hasn't gotten them in yet. Personally I think if he doesn't go she should make her ex sue for the amount he paid in cs since the kid graduated HS.


cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #5 on: Dec 03, 2007, 09:01:23 AM »
He works under the table, so they can't get the CS from him and there's no income tax to take because he doesn't report any income.  

This is what I mean about NJ helping the person that is not doing right by the children.  

I have a VERY good job and have been working here for 26 years.  Because I DO have a good job and NJ bases CS on incomes, my ex's child support is very low.  Yet he just doesn't pay it and when I call the child support office, they tell me that they are doing everything that they can and that "you can't get blood from a stone"  I HATE that saying!!   I worked THREE jobs when our daughter was a baby just to make ends meet.  

I would think that your sister's DH could ask for proof that his son is attending college.  

NJ is a really bad state when it come to child support.  My ex owes our daughter over $37,000!!!!  She will never see it.  Yet, he keeps fathering more children and doesn't support them either.  I feel sorry for all of his children!

Good luck to your sister and her DH!

mistoffolees

  • Sr. Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1697
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #6 on: Dec 03, 2007, 02:36:30 PM »
>He works under the table, so they can't get the CS from him
>and there's no income tax to take because he doesn't report
>any income.  

Then report him to the IRS. They'll investigate his financial records (even if he's very good at hiding the money, there's going to be some paper trail).

Then, you'll get a reward for turning him in which you can use to support his kids.

babyfat

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 70
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #7 on: Dec 03, 2007, 03:31:47 PM »
I was just going to say the same thing. does he have a bank account? Does he own a car? A house? They can take all these things. I don't condone it in most cases but this seems to be a case where it would be the thing to do becuase
1) NJ has public transportation so he can get to work that way
2) he keeps having kids without taking responcibility for the ones he already has
3) If he has no income how is he paying his bills.

Also do you know where he is working under the table? Employer's get in big trouble for that. If you reported to the IRS that he is working at such and such a place under the table and they show up there and he is working both are in trouble. Also $37000 is a large sum why isn't he in jail? they are not doing what they should to get your child thier money. Remember the squeeky wheel gets the oil. Call Call Call till they get sick of you and fix the problem.

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #8 on: Dec 04, 2007, 07:00:33 AM »
No, he doesn't have a bank account.

No, he doesn't own a car (he doesn't even have a driver's license).

No, he doesn't own a house (nor is he on any lease).

He has no bills.  He lives off of other people (his mother, his girlfriends, etc).

No, I don't know where he's working when he works "under the table".
Yes, $37,000 is a large sum of money, but in NJ they don't like to arrest him and put him in jail anymore (*they used to).  What they do now is they arrest him and have him go before the judge the same day.  The Judge orders him to come up with two weeks payment within 10 days.  My ex agrees and they let him go.  My ex ignores the court order and doesn't come up with the money within 10 days and nothing is done to him!  I call ALL the time and they just keep telling me that they are doing everything that they can.  I also write letters to my local politicians and they look into the problem and finally send me a letter telling me that the CS office is doing everything that they can.  

By the way, he must NOW be working on the books, because I just received two CS payments from his employer.  Both payments weren't full payments, but at least it's something.  Unfortunately whenever this has happened in the past, he usually gets fired soon after they start taking the CS out of his check because he starts "not showing up" for work.  He hates when they take CS out of his check.  

He's a loser, but the state of NJ isn't helping by letting him get away with not supporting his children!

Your sister's DH is a good father because he supports his children, but the state tends to come down on those type of NCPs.  The CS office in our area has been telling me for over 16 years now that you "can't get blood from a stone", but that SAME CS office used to call my former boss and harrass him about his CS payments.  My former boss made
HUGE CS payments that were garnished from his paycheck each week.  He spent alot of time with his children and paid ALL of their medical bills because his ex didn't work.  He paid SO much CS that he couldn't even afford an apartment for himself, so he got a part-time job working on a farm nights and weekends in order to get free room and board.  The man made a 6-figure income, yet he couldn't even afford to have his own place because that SAME CS office went after him!!!!  

Like I said before NJ STINKS!!!!

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #9 on: Dec 04, 2007, 07:06:38 AM »
He has NO financial records.  He has no bank account.  I can't prove that he "works under the table", but I know that he does.

There is no paper trail.  He doesn't even have a valid mailing address because he has no residence.  He moves from place to place (his mothers house, his girlfriend's house, etc).

The man is 44 years old and has no residence and no bank account!

mistoffolees

  • Sr. Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1697
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #10 on: Dec 04, 2007, 04:14:20 PM »
So, basically, you don't have any evidence that he's working under the table and he doesn't have a lifestyle that suggests that he does.

I think you're getting some bad information. If he fails to show up for a court appearance, they can issue a bench warrant, have him arrested, and throw him in jail.

olanna

  • Moderator
  • SuperHero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9821
  • Karma: 416
    • View Profile
RE: My ex is very sneaky!
« Reply #11 on: Dec 05, 2007, 01:38:21 AM »
It's called staying under the radar...but someone has to carry them to be able to do it.  Wonder what he will do when he runs out of people to enable this behavior...

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
No I don't have evidence
« Reply #12 on: Dec 05, 2007, 06:52:15 AM »
but if you saw him, it's obvious that he has money.  Designer clothing, gold jewelry, etc.

They DO issue a bench warrant.  They do arrest him.  Then they let him go with a promise that he will make a payment, which he never does.

I have asked the caseworker to notify me when he gets arrested so I can be in court when he goes before the judge, but she never notifies me.  So.....I don't get a chance to talk to the judge and voice my concerns.  

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
I thought that he HAD run out of people.
« Reply #13 on: Dec 05, 2007, 06:53:54 AM »
His mother lives in senior citizen housing, so he can no longer live with her.  His brothers are all out on their own now (because the mother lives in senior citizen housing), so THEY won't let him live with them for free.  His girlfriend kicked him out TWO years ago, so I thought that she had finally smartened up.  But....I have heard rumors that the girlfriend has taken him back, so he still has her to carry him!  She's a fool!!!

olanna

  • Moderator
  • SuperHero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9821
  • Karma: 416
    • View Profile
RE: I thought that he HAD run out of people.
« Reply #14 on: Dec 05, 2007, 10:43:22 AM »
This is EXACTLY how ex #1 got the ridiculous CS order he got. His wife's family had money, so they backed him 100% on the funding of the custody battle...he did carpentry work for the judge.

Anyway, he had nothing in his name and no regular income. While the first judge we had told him to get a job and the issue of CS was a wash, as he never paid and I was the sole supporter of a child in college, the next judge was a former client of my ex's, although I didn't know it at the time.

I have considered suing the state of SC.  Still think about it and believe that after my Mom no longer lives in SC, I very well may do that.

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
Yup!
« Reply #15 on: Dec 05, 2007, 01:57:02 PM »
My ex had nothing in his name.  He doesn't even have an address according to the U.S. Post Office.

NJ is awful and I complain ALL the time to the politicians and they pretty much ignore me.

It stinks that there is a child support order in place, but nothing is done to enforce it!


mistoffolees

  • Sr. Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1697
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
RE: Yup!
« Reply #16 on: Dec 05, 2007, 09:54:55 PM »
According to you, he has no bank accounts, no car, no tax returns, no job that anyone knows about. Just how are they going to collect anything?

If you can prove that he has assets, then they'd probably go after them. But "he has ne clothes" just isn't going to give them anything to seize. Get a PI to follow him around if you wish. But without evidence, no one's going to believe the assertion that he has money.

Yes, they could throw him in jail and if he has repeatedly violated a judge's order, they should do so. But that's not going to get blood out of a stone.

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
So....
« Reply #17 on: Dec 06, 2007, 07:36:28 AM »
does this mean that he shouldn't be required to support his children?????

olanna

  • Moderator
  • SuperHero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9821
  • Karma: 416
    • View Profile
RE: So....
« Reply #18 on: Dec 06, 2007, 06:52:18 PM »
It means the system doesn't work...it doesn't work for those that do pay and it doesn't work for those that aren't receiving.

;)

cinb85

  • Private Reserve
  • SuperHero
  • ***
  • Posts: 2016
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • http://www.msn.com/
You are exactly right!!!
« Reply #19 on: Dec 07, 2007, 06:27:13 PM »
nm

 

Copyright © SPARC - A Parenting Advocacy Group
Use of this website does not constitute a client/attorney relationship and this site does not provide legal advice.
If you need legal assistance for divorce, child custody, or child support issues, seek advice from a divorce lawyer.