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Messages - LizaLou1

Does anyone have experience/knowledge of Alabama's Central Distribution Center initiating one of their 4 yr auto review of child support obligations?



This links you to a page where a victom of PAS was relieved of paying child support due to the alienators actions.  Not sure what to think about this.

I also posted this to you on Soc's board. He always has the best advice, so listen to him. But, I wanted to share our experiences...

DH had similar problems until he took the position that he was not financially responsible for debts made by his ex. He is responsible for paying 1/2 TO the ex - not directly to the doctor. She selects the doctor and she takes the kids in alone (we live in a different state). Therefore, she is responsible party directly to the Doctor. She used to tell the Doctor to send the billings directly to DH because she wanted him to pay all up front. He never did he'd only pay 1/2 and they stopped after he provided the divorce papers and a letter referencing Fair Debt Collections Practices Act.

I agree with the doctor that he should not be responsible for the 50/50 payment issues. Below is part of the letter DH sent to the doctors. They quickly saw the light and stopped billing him directly. Or it could be the EX was so embarrased she accepted their billings. Needless to say she was furious that her crap was opened to view of a third party.

"I am not responsible for debts or obligations incurred by EX. This is not a refusal to pay, but a notice that your claim is disputed. Under the Fair Debt Collections Practices Act (FDCPA), I have the right to request validation of the contractual obligation, which you suggest is binding on me to pay this debt. You should also be aware that reporting such invalidated information to major credit bureaus might constitute defamation of character, as the negative marks on my credit report harm my credit and prevent me from enjoying all the benefits of good credit."

Now DH doesn't pay his ex's demands unless and until he get the doctor's billing records FROM the ex that shows insurance payments AND the insurance company's explanation of benefits that shows what they paid. It's important that you get the doctor's statement AFTER insurance pays because they often write-off a portion of the remaining balance. We usually call the doctors for a 2nd copy just to compare with what the EX sent.

Currently the ex has no sent billings in almost 2 years and we know there have been medical issues. She loves to tell people and the kids dad doesn't pay. We send her a letter every couple of months asking for documentation. But, no documentation - no money. Our attorney is cool with this approach. It would make his day if she'd sue us over this issue.



Cudos for valuing an education.  Knowledge opens many doors.  However, why are both of you going to school at the same time?  And, why no part time jobs?  It can be done, because I did it.

You could ask Socrates here at SPARC, he is an attorney.  What do your papers say about college?  If you give in now, she may just come after you again to pay for that just when you think its over.

While I think parents have some obligations to pay for college (if the kid is college material), I don't believed they should be railroaded into it, if their finances do not now allow.  Kids also need to be responsible for college.

I also recommend an attorney.  The trick here is that her attorney will ask for all sort of things that are not necessary just to overwhelm and confuse you.  He will also lie to you and try to divert and prolong the process to her benefit.

Your attorney can insulate you from her attorney's crap and help you only answer what is necessary.

Best of Luck

Child Support Issues / How much for housing?
Mar 09, 2004, 07:34:48 PM
I'm the first to admit child support obligations can be biased in favor of woman and it makes me sick what some people do (or don't do) with their children's support.  But....

If we limit the topic to just housing, just what formula would any of you suggest using to substantiate such an expense to a NCP.

Do you divide the monthly mortgage/rent, insurance, property tax, maintenance, and utilities by the number of people living in the house?

Should adults be weighted heavier than children in such an equation.

How much weight should be given to the fact you only have a bigger house (more bedrooms) in the best school district because your kids need it but you wouldn't without them?

I'm all ears (eyes).


The insured is the BM, the kids are posted as "drivers".
Child Support Issues / Reasonble College Support
Feb 27, 2004, 04:49:41 PM