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Messages - wife1

Pages: 12 3 ... 5
Second Families / Re: And the drama has begun again. :(
« on: Apr 16, 2012, 08:59:10 PM »
the way it was explained was that since it is a divorce decree and they had to come to an agreement, what ever extra money he sends through AG is almost like a credit for him. So if he deposits at least 3-4 months worth of c.s, and he happens to loose his job for some reason he still has enough money in there to cover the times he is unable to pay. Yes someone told me the other is just a gift if it is sent through the mail.She has never taken him back in 13 years for an increase in child support so we dont know waht to expect.

Second Families / And the drama has begun again. :(
« on: Apr 16, 2012, 06:53:08 PM »
 I need any and all information I can get about Arizona child support laws. The BM of my husband's son is threatening my husband she is going to send him back for an increase in child support, no big deal but we have a feeling that she cannot afford an attorney so she is just sending ugly texts  to my husband saying how he needs to send more money because what she gets is not enough. Even admitting that she is telling their son that she refers to him as the "sperm donor" . But my question is because we are in texas if we send money through attorney general i know she will not get it but will it help us on our side because it shows that we are sending money to them plus still sending her a check? Does it not make a difference? Can we use the texts to show her harrassing him if they do go back to court?

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Jan 03, 2012, 03:50:42 PM »
Well today my SS left back with his mother and I was the one who dropped him off at her inlaws house. Luckily she wasn't there so I didnt have to deal with her. Today was a bit of an eye opener with him, he normaly cries when he leaves but today he cried with me, and it was a first. It was a completly different emotion for me, I hugged him and made sure we were both facing away from the door so his SF couldn't see or hear what  we were saying or doing. It was the first time he hugged me and I could tell he wasen't ready to let go. All I could do was reassure him that we loved him, missed him, and would always have his room waiting for him for whenever he was ready to come stay with us. Today it hit me when we were having our moment of how much this poor child is hurting inside and how conflicted he really is. He wants to be with us but feels his loyalty with his mother, he doesnt want to feel guilty about wanting to see or be with us but he does. My heart breaks for him. Before I felt so passionate about pushing the issue about him coming and now I feel like we shouldnt because that is what she is doing only oposite. We dont ever want to make him choose between his mom and us, or to feel like that is what we are trying to get him to do. If he comes it should be because it is his own choice. Today was just different, I wasent prepared for it. And now Im just sad....

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 27, 2011, 08:52:45 AM »
"Let me see if I can put some perspective on it......it's because she HATES your DH more than she LOVES your SS.  It's because regardless of what her life might be like now, she still holds a grudge against your DH and your SS is the most convenient tool to get back at him (and you by association).  It's because she perceives this so-called 'pain' associated with your DH (and you) and she wants you both to hurt more than she does.  It's because she's vindictive and spiteful and basically a school yard bully."
You said that perfectly!
He is here and she is only allowing him to stay for 4 days out of the 14 they are going to be here, and the worse part is that my husband didnt even try to get her to allow him more time together. I want to tell him to tell her to allow him to stay longer but I know he won't. He hates to argue with her and says it just isn't worth the fight.  I think I butt in too much but I can't help but push him . Your completly right though she does HATE  him enough to keep doing this to him and all of us and its sad. He has been here since aturday night and goes back tomorrow, and I know SS wants to stay longer but he doesn't say anything because he knows he will just get in trouble with her too. I can see what he will end up being like as an adult and it is not looking good.

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 20, 2011, 07:46:46 PM »
He comes from a home where no one says thank you, please, your welcome, or any other kind of basic kindness. A house totaly devoid of politeness. He is starting to have an attitude of we owe him something. I hate feeling the dread of his arrival and the affect it will have on our girls. I know my daughter ( the one he doesnt get along with) said that he had grabbed her arm last time he was down, and i normally have patience with him, but this pushed me over the limit. She is only 6 and he is 12 ,I finally had to call my inlaws to come get him . I couldnt even stand to be around him and had to have him leave. What makes it worse is that he is with me the majority time while my husband is working, so how do i discipline him with out over stepping any boundaries? It is hard for me to understand why she feels the need to make this situation so difficult, she goes out of her way to do and say things that will change his feelings and his relationship with any of us for the worse. She has been married to her husband for almost 13yrs and they have two kids of their own a beautiful home, and she still does these things. We never bother her or talk bad about her, or argue with her and she still does this nonsense. It is so emotionally and physically draining on me and my relationship with my husband. i just dont know what to do :'( 

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 20, 2011, 09:18:42 AM »
Mom Jailed for Letting Son Use Step-Dad’s Last NameApril 9, 2010 by Sheree R. CurryA mother must spend 10 days in jail for signing her son up for a baseball league using his  stepfather’s last name instead of that of his biological dad, the Alabama Court of  Appeals ruled.Lisa Preston was required to have her son use the last name of her  former husband, Matthew Saab, when playing sports, according to the parties 2005 divorce decree, but in 2008 she did not use the Saab last name when she registered the 13-year-old.  She claimed it was the boy’s choice. But as we all know, children can be influenced. The appellate court determined that the child, who ultimately put his first name on the back of the jersey instead of either last name, felt caught in the middle trying to please both parents, who divorced in Alaska in 1997, two years after he was born, although the parents had separated some time before then.
  I know its terrible but im glad I found this, maybe we could use it to help us

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 20, 2011, 07:54:45 AM »
What is PAS? As a matter of fact I can remember when she sent a pack of school pictures it has the step dads name on it to. I know she does that kind of stuff just out of anger but its wrong and having him do it too is even worse. He had one before but it was a joint account with his younger half brother and both I and my husband were friend with him on it but after my husband and his mom got in an argument this summer she deleted the account. She never informs us of anything going on with him and hardly answers the phone so the only way we got to see pictures of him was through her account and his and now we never see anything or know anything. We cant prove but we know she tells him things about us and the kids, even though we cant prove anything. Once when she was pregnant with her last kid she told him that our kids werent his siblings only hers. 

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 19, 2011, 07:17:03 PM »
saw something i wish i had not because now i am just getting seriously angry. Bio mom is adding a hyphen and step dads last name on ss name. It might not be a real big deal seeing as how it is on fb but if she is doing it there than who knows where else she is doing it.

Second Families / Re: stepson coming to visit
« on: Dec 19, 2011, 05:34:47 PM »
I really wish that was all it was but unfortunalty he has always been that way with our kids, with my/our oldest who is 6 he cant stand to be around her, wont speak to her other than to tell her to be quiet or get away. His father works all the time and is never here so your right he is always stuck with me for the majority of the time. Plus when ever no one is around I hear him tell the oldest one things like " you have to listen to me" so I had to tell my girl she doesnt I certainly dont want him taking advantage of her.

Where do we go? is it county offices or where?

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