Doctor appointments

[dipper]

Our situation:  Father and paternal grandparents share legal and physical custody with mother and maternal grandmother.   There is nothing in the order concerning doctor visits.   
Child had check-up yesterday.  Father (our son) called the mother last week to make sure she could take her as he would reschedule if she could not.  She stated that she would be taking child to the appointment.  Sunday, our son told her that he will meet her at the doctor's office as it is less than a mile from his  home and he would like to be part of her doctor visit. 
The mother called and postponed the appointment without telling him.  He went to the doctor's office and was told it was rescheduled until 10:30 this morning.  He spoke with the mother who said she was unable to make yesterday's appt.  So, he goes this morning at 10:30 and is told she called and cancelled again!  Again..she did not tell him even though she knew he was attending.
I am sure she is waiting to take child on day our son is working as he goes back to work tomorrow and works out of town.   Is there anything that can be done short of going back to court or do you just have to suck up the trifling stuff?
Also, our new order - which has not be processed through courts even though we went to court on April 7th - states a 30 day advance notice must be given if a party is moving.  Notice must be given in writing and contain the new address, mailing address, and phone number.
She called us last Thursday to tell us she, the maternal grandmother, and child will be moving prior to May1st.  They do not pay rent as they live in a single-wide a relative allows them to live in, so they are not being evicted.  She said a 3 bedroom farm house opened up but they had to be in by May 1st or lose it.   She has not provided an address for this house and nothing has been put in writing.
Any thoughts?

[MixedBag]

Schedule doctor's appointment only on dad's time -- stay in control that way.

Moving.....if it's a close distance .... don't sweat the small stuff ... and "Just run late one day and say you'll do all the driving to her home, just tell me where to drop off our child" or FOLLOW her home/them home.

Common sense says cooperate -- but when the other side plays games, you have to play smarter.

Trying to remember -- school records?  it's kinda late in the year, or how do the exchanges happen?  I'd ask a friend to follow them home and report back.  Something that shouldn't be necessary, but hey, cheaper than running back to court.

And yes, I've ALWAYS had to get Dad's address -- by using back doors because Dad just isn't cooperative -- and that's goes for all three EX's.  Funny how their address was revealed many times.

[dipper]

Thank you.  She did exactly what I figured - she made the appointment for Friday, May 8th so that my son will be out of town working.  My husband had offered that he and son would take child next Monday, but she said no, she wanted to take her.  I think this will be a pattern of control now that she has thrown the schedule off.  Child has always had check-ups on Monday or Tuesday as that is when her dad is off of work.  The mother was the one who started this as she always wanted him there from birth on....


The child is only 1 1/2 so there are no school records or anything to pull for the address.  I have seriously been thinking of checking into a private investigator - the rates - as there are several things I am sure she is not telling the truth about.  The mother lives over an hour away, we just don't know where anymore!

[MixedBag]

Does Dad have the child before then and can an appointment be scheduled then?  And if Dad can't go -- can YOU go as the grandparent since if I remember right, you're mentioned in the order?

Skip private investigator -- ask a friend....

Where are exchanges?

[MixedBag]

child's medical records for address?  she might have updated it with them as she probably considers herself the primary residential parent.....and bills have to go somewhere.

[dipper]

We have no friends in her area.  The doctor - I doubt if she has updated the address yet and there are no bills as the child is on state insurance.  So, there is not much of a way for us to find out the new address.

[MixedBag]

state insurance.....hmmm....probably a way to access that on line.

So dad doesn't have or provide insurance too?

You have a PM.