Opinion - CS- Who should pay for what?

[wendl]

Well I pay 100% of everything as my sons dad fails to pay his cs.

Now my dh pays his cs and this is what happens to him.
Mom never sends kids with clothing (only what they have on their backs) so dh buys clothing, toys etc for our house. DH pays for gifts if the kids go to bday parties while at our house, mothers day, xmas ect, kids make their moms gifts.

Parents need to realize instead of trying to ruin the NCP they need to work together, I personallyl think ALL cp's should have to use the CS credit card and give the NCP the monthly statement showing WHAT they spend the cs on, we know dh's ex doesn't spend it on the kids or OSS would have had glasses by now ( hasn't had them since June)

If I got cs, I would spend it on, clothing, medical prescriptions (cost me around $60 a month after ins for sons meds) shoes, food (you all know how much pre-teens can eat. But my cs is $160 a month so that would be one in a minute.

It is so sad that each parent can't help the other when providing for the kids, in a perfect world NO cs would be ordered, the parents would need to work together to provide for the kids, I personally think CS is a joke as when you were with the mom/dad you weren't told how much to spend on your kids and ordered to spend that much. That is just silly I don't see how the states can appose certain amounts of monies that ncp must pay, how can they do the fairly hmm They DON'T.

They don't take into consideration that most ncps need to move back in with their parents, live our of their cars, live with friends or relatives, they put the ncp in the poor house and they then cannot provide for the kids while in their care (at least some of them) all the while the cp can get new clothes (not for the kids) new cars etc. Pretty sad in my opinion.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[Kitty C.]

Hell yes!  Our PBFH is SO anal that she actually makes a list of everything that goes into SS's bag and checks everything off when he gets back!  SS has gotten better at making sure he has everything together before he leaves, but there was a while there that we always got a call within an hour of him going back, asking to find some piece of clothing and DH would have to drop everything he was doing, find it, and bring it over IMMEDIATELY.

When SS is sick, she sends over the meds with a CHART of times it is to be taken and DH has to mark off that it was done.  It pissed me off so much that when SS was apparently 'constipated' (wasn't), I went overboard, taking his vitals (BP, pulse, resp.) every 4 hours, wrote down EVERYthing he put in his mouth, the time of EVERY bathroom visit, what he eliminated, how much, AND the consistency and color!  If she wanted anal, I was going to give her anal!  DH thought it was a hoot!

But you know what's REALLY sad?  She never batted an eye when DH handed her all the documentation for that weekend.......she's NEVER said a word about it.  Then I found out from past babysitters of hers that they couldn't stand dealing with her.  As infants, both SS and her current rugrat came to daycare with JOURNALS and they had to practically write down the SAME THINGS!  Times, quantities, consistencies for both intake and output.  The way I figured it, if she would have had the intelligence, she would have made a great nurse, at least when it comes to documentation.  DH told me that she writes EVERYTHING down and makes lists ALL the time.  Talk about insecure, paranoid, and ANAL.................

[stepmom]

My husband & I buy his daughter school clothes every year for the past 4 years and spend a couple hundred dollars.  Instead of her mother saying thank you she comes back saying what are you trying to do make yourselves look good to the court or win his daughters love.  Now how absurd is that.    We have also paid 1/2 for her glasses once to find out 2 months later she still hadn't gotten them and paid her mothers 1/2 just so she could get them.  I think what infuriates me the most is that her mother refuses to work and sits back & collects cs and for most of his daugthers life welfare because she won't work.   If she does do any work she makes sure to get paid under the table so she doesn't have to report it to anyone. She is now taking us to court for more support this is the 4th time in  a couple of months because she has failed to show because she forgot or whatever and then files again.  We also pay for her medical insurance & have paid for other things that she has called & wanted, yet her mother really pays for nothing.   Will the courts take this into consideration when determining the amount of cs??  Also how do you feel about the mother wearing the clothes/shoes of her daugther that we purchased for her for school??   The daughter once made a comment to us that her mother needs to get a job and buy her own stuff.  She tried hiding her boots on her mother one day when she went to school and got punished for it.    Another question, how does taxes work is there something that says we can claim his daugther maybe every other year??