Transgender Children

[Donnie Beag]

I live in Europe, my 5 year old son lives with his mother in North America. She unilaterally claims he is a she. Apparently all authorities accept this, school, church. Where I live Social Work would ask questions as would every Government department involved with children. My son was born in Europe to a NA mother but after 2 years she returned to live over there. I tried but after year found it impossible; relationship deterioration and urban lifestyle among a few problems.
My question is where can I; who can I receive independent information on this?

[Waylon]

I think the question is, what specifically do you want, both short- and long-term? What is your goal?

[MixedBag]

Dealt with the transgender issue in our (distant) family just last week.

I think you have two things going on.

First is the parenting time issue and the first question is always WHAT's in the court order?  And is your "foreign" decree recognized by the US in order to get it enforced?

Second is the transgender issue.  Learned (and I'm not kidding -- this was last week), that when a person is transgender, the "politically correct" thing to do is to refer to the individual by the pronoun they prefer and want to identify with.  Even though they haven't made the full transition from he to she biologically or vice versa, that's what the advice is from the community of gay and lesbian site.  Google it, it was one of the first articles that appeared when I put in "What do I call a transgender?"  I moved from saying "HE" to "CHILD" and that still pissed off Mom and Auntie....they kept correcting my verbage by saying "SHE" (one word) after my posts. 

I also googled (actually did this one first) about changing birth certificates and found the state by state laws.  So while She wants to be called a He, that can't be changed in many states until a medical doctor declares the transition is complete.

I go into all this -- because you have a HUGE problem called distance and geography.  You might need to suck up and placate mom until she agrees to put your child on a plane to come see you.  You may or may not agree with the transgender issue, but put your child first and the fact that YOUR CHILD needs both parents in their lives.....

Geography was a huge problem for EX#3 and his EX, and even my EX#2 and myself -- and you're talking two countries.  There were many times where we'd be at the airport gate waiting for children to disembark and they weren't there.  (yea, mainly his EX -- she was a winner).  And we were all in the states!

I think the transgender issue with regards to the divorce is a NON-issue with the courts.  The child is a minor until emancipated.

Work the two issues parallel to each other....or side by side.

Does that make sense?

[PorcupineToyota]

If your child really is transgender, or if they are not, the key is letting them know they are loved and you will support them through their lives regardless of whether they are a he or a she. You love THEM, not their gender.

Hang in there. This sounds so tough.

I googled and found a couple of links....but this site doesn't let me post them. I'm sorry.

[PorcupineToyota]

http :/ /www .hrc .org/ resources/ transgender-children-youth-ask-the-expert-is-my-child-transgender

A few things i found via google

http :/ /www .wikihow .com /Determine-if-a-Child-is-Transgender

http :// k uow. org /pos t/ when-do-kids-know-they-re-transgender-younger-youd-think


Figured out how to get around it. Weird that they don't allow links. Probably due to spammers or something.

[tigger]

Figured out how to get around it. Weird that they don't allow links. Probably due to spammers or something.

After you've posted for a while, the site will allow you to post links.  It's to prevent spammers from hitting the site.