False Allegations

[gemini3]

First, I'd like to say how thankful I am to have a resource like you.  This is a tough sitation to be in, and it does a lot for peace of mind to have advice from you.

All parties reside in VA, mother has sole physical and we share joint legal.  We have been having massive issues regarding visitation (mother does everything she can to block), and have petitioned the court for clarification.  The matter was continued, along with her original petition for support modification until Feb because I have to go out of town for work until then.

Since the we went to court and it was continued she has begun to make false allegations against me.  I am concerned because in the past she accused a prior girlfriend's young son of molesting my daughter.  I had no choice but to end the relationship due to the accusation, which was never verified.  I want to believe my daughter, but part of me wonders if it really happened, especially in light of all of the other false allegations she has made.  Of course, if I show any inkling of doubting the allegation I'm crucified by her for not believing my daughter, allowing it to happen, etc.  I felt stuck with no way to defend myself.

She has not made allegations of this magnitude as of late, but I am worried that it will happen again.  Mostly it's just saying that I'm irresponsible, can't be trusted with the children, I let my daughter sleep in the bed with my fiance and I, and things like that, but I am worried that it will get worse if she doesn't start getting her way.

Since she closed her case with DSCE I have had to start mailing her a check certified mail.  Now she's saying it's illegal for me to pay her that way because it's a joiny account with my fiance and she signed the check.

Two questions:

1.  Is there anything I can do about the false allegations?  How do you suggest I handle this?

2.  Is it illegal for me to pay her this way?  I can't imagine that it would be, but I just want to make sure.

[socrateaser]

>Two questions:
>
>1.  Is there anything I can do about the false allegations?
>How do you suggest I handle this?

You try to act in the child's best interests. That's all you can do.

>
>2.  Is it illegal for me to pay her this way?  I can't imagine
>that it would be, but I just want to make sure.

Illegal in this context is a non sequitur, because it doesn't matter how you pay the obligee parent as long as you pay timely.

However, by using a joint account, you are risking your fiance coming back and claiming that you used funds which were not yours to use, to pay your support obligation, and so you should be required to reimburse.

NEVER comingle funds or share joint title to assests, as long as you have a child support obligation. This is actually a warning for you AND your finance, because there is always the possibility that the obligee parent will find a way to attach your finace's separate property.

HUGE ERROR.

[gemini3]

Excuse my ignorance here, but how can my ex-wife go after my fiance's funds and assets for child support?  That makes no sense to me.  My fiance should bear no financial repsonsibility for the support of my children.  My support obligation doesn't decrease because my ex-wife and kids live with a man who makes twice what I do - why would my obligation increase because my finace has income and assets?

[socrateaser]

>Excuse my ignorance here, but how can my ex-wife go after my
>fiance's funds and assets for child support?  That makes no
>sense to me.  My fiance should bear no financial
>repsonsibility for the support of my children.  My support
>obligation doesn't decrease because my ex-wife and kids live
>with a man who makes twice what I do - why would my obligation
>increase because my finace has income and assets?

Family law doesn't make sense, so attempting to make sense of what "should" be in family law is a non sequitur.

Examples of how your fiance's funds can be attached:

1. If you have a joint account, and you are in arrears, and the court obtains a judgment against you, then the obligee can get a writ of garnishment against your joint account, purchase a bond to cover any inadvertant acquisition of funds to which the obligee is not entitled, and the seize the assets to cover your support.

At the time of the seizure, the account could contain only money earned by your fiance. Now, try to get it back.

2. In some states, the law expressly obligates a spouse or cohabiting partner for the support of any minor child of the other spouse/cohatitant, while the child resides in the home. So, if you have 50/50 custody, then your significant other can be on the hook for 1/2 of the support obligation as a matter of law.

3. In CA, the law expressly permits the court to consider a spouse or cohabiting partner's income for the purpose of calculating child support in "extraordinary circumstances," where the child will suffer a great hardship otherwise. That's pretty broad language, and it gives the court all sorts of wiggle room. So, if you didn't have any cash, buy you were in joint title on a home, and the court found that you were willfully unemployed, then the court could calculate your support obligation based on your fiance's income, and then establish a judgment for arrears, and then your ex could get a writ of execution and have your home liquidated at a sherrif's sale to cover your support obligation.

Do these sorts of things happen often? No. Are they possible? Yes. Society has created ivory towers around children of divorced or never married parents, and the courts have the power to invade assets on all sorts of legal theories which perhaps "should" not exist, but "do" exist anyway.

This is despite the existence of the 5th Amendment's prohibition on takings without just compensation. The reason is because no judge and no legislator is prepared to risk a career by acting in a manner which appears to favor parents over their innocent minor children. Sometimes, the draft sucks in surrounding third parties who arguably "shouldn't" be involved.

But, don't kid yourself. If it comes to a battle between your minor child living on the street and your spouse's bank account, I can assure you that you will expend huge amounts of legal fees attempting to defend against an unfavorable family court ruling.

So, caveat emptor.

[raymi]

In regard to your third statement: My case is in MN. The CP is in MN. I am the NCP and live in WI. I own a home with joint tenantship with my fiance.
Providing the circumstance were ripe for  the senerio you described happen to me?

How scary!

[socrateaser]

>In regard to your third statement: My case is in MN. The CP
>is in MN. I am the NCP and live in WI. I own a home with joint
>tenantship with my fiance.
>Providing the circumstance were ripe for  the senerio you
>described happen to me?
>
>How scary!

Yes. Very. I can't assess your situation without researching MN law. The easy way around is to simply not comingle any assets.

[raymi]

It's too late for me like I stated I allready own a home with joint tenatship(both of our names are on the loan and title).

To save you from looking up the law, Where would I look up the info?

What specifically would I look for?

[socrateaser]

>It's too late for me like I stated I allready own a home with
>joint tenatship(both of our names are on the loan and title).
>
>
>To save you from looking up the law, Where would I look up the
>info?
>
>What specifically would I look for?

You would have to research both the case law, which can be found ad //www.versuslaw.com, and the statutes, which are usually found on your state legislature's website.

This is not an easy question. You're not likely to just find it staring back at you in a statute. It will be the confluence of a number of appellate court opinions in your jurisdiction.