ANYONE?

[I cry_ in_the_dark]

While there is no Soc, and probably never will be another Soc.......does anyone care to use this forum to continue the little "family" group that has come to form over the months and years? Until maybe there is a Soc II?
We all know it's not legal advise, but we can all be here for each other. Gawd knows.....anyone in our messes needs support.
I for one, have something I'd love to listen to you all on............

[FLMom]

While it won't be "legal advice" per se, I'm all for us helping each other out and I'll keep coming back. I like our family. Matter of fact, I wonder if MixedBag and backwardsbike are really relatives of mine, lol.

ICITD----what's going on?

[I cry_ in_the_dark]

I told "Soc" 2 weeks ago about my X......the CP.......beating my son with a board.
This past Thursday, my X admitted my son,12 years old, to a psych ward.
Today in the mail,  I get a letter from the CYS stating that I was the alledge perpetrator, it was unfounded, but would remain on my record for 1 year.
I WAS THE ONE THAT CALLED CYS, AND I LIVE 600 MILES AWAY AND HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!!!!! I am the one that reported it!!!!!!!!!!!
Law suit?

[FLMom]

Geez Louise!!

My first instinct would be to find out if CYS has an arbitration process. Send a letter stating the facts, that you were the one that called and a copy of your court papers showing that you did not have custody of the child during that time period.

If it was me, I'd hint at the fact that I'd hate to have to have my lawyer get involved, and that you're sure that things could be settled and fixed amicably before you make that call.

NOT legal advice, just my thoughts.

This is so crappy. I'm sorry you're going through this!! It's ridiculous.

Let us know what happens,
FLMom

[I cry_ in_the_dark]

I'm not worried about me, I'm worried about my kids.
 I will be contacting them on Monday..........telling them they have their facts mixed up...............
   I will also advise them that a court admonished ME for spanking my child with my hand.......but they are advising NO ABUSE for beating a child with a board..........
  That they are putting me on the "list" as the perpetrator that will put me on the list for a year when I was the one that reported it will result in a major legal battle........
I've put up with a lot, but I won't put up with this.

[FLMom]

I understand that you're worried about your kiddos. I would be too. Are they old enough to know to call the police if they're beaten again?

I had a similar experience, though not with a beating. My ex called one night, out of the blue about 10pm at night, calling me the c-word among other nasty things, and telling me I'd ruined his life, etc. He had the kiddos with him that night and I was freaking out whether they were OK or not. I wasn't going to go over there, but I did call the local sheriff in his area and explain to them what happened. I asked them to perform a welfare check on my children. They went around the house after the ex let them in and checked on all of them. I knew they were OK then, and could quit panicking.

While it's too late this time, if it happens again, maybe you could have them call you immedietly if they can't call the police themselves. Then you can call and have someone do a welfare check.

I'd follow up that phone call to CYS with the paperwork I mentioned earlier. That way, you have a paper trail from day one should this ever have to go through the court system. And it doesn't have to result in a legal battle, not if you're able with common sense to back up the fact that you couldn't have done it if you weren't there. I mean, I'm sure they have enough on their plates with other matters----if you come back from their accusations strongly enough, it could dissuade them from persuing the matter if they know they're going to have to spend time and funds dealing with this in the courts. That's why I'd let them know you have your lawyer on speed dial----doesn't mean you're gonna do it, but you could.

Again, not legal advice. Just my own opinion.

FLMom

[MixedBag]

Yes, I'm hoping that this part of the site will be continued.

There are other SMART people out there that know this bit or that bit, or can share links to the state's codes and stuff.  And at the very least, that help should be given on this page (IMHO of course).

It should be understood that NONE of us are attorneys, but many of us have gone to court and have experienced court and that could still be shared here.  The real Soc for example would have not responded to me the way he did down below when the person was asking about GA stuff.   Soc quite often would say something close to "Don't know how YOUR state would handle it" and IF you were clear to the person that you weren't giving legal advice and only from personal experience, then I think Soc actually appreciated that.  Heck as a trained mediator, I have to be very careful not to cross the line and be a counselor, attorney, or anything other than a MEDIATOR.

As for the second problem you're having, I lean towards no law suit.  Why?  It's just more headaches and if you can use other avenues to get things straightened up, then do so.

MY STBX#3 last summer was all talk about suing the builder who was building our (my dream) home because the contract was for 180 days and it took them 18 months.  He said he already talked to an attorney who promised him this and that, and even after we split up, I said to him that I wouldn't sue because it's just more headaches and aren't you just plain tired of court?  Get into the house, and don't recommend them to anyone.  That will hurt them more than any law suit.

Same with you, girl.  Work through the system to straighten it all out.  Remember that everyone works for someone, and work it up the chain of command.  THEN consider a law suit.  Like when the bank ignored me, but they didn't ignore a complaint filed with the state's banking commission.....funny how I got the issue resolved quickly that way.  No court necessary.

[I cry_ in_the_dark]

The reason I'm so upset is that I still return to PA to chaperone school trips etc. Since I live out of state, they make me obtain clearances to do so. They have put this "unfounded abuse" on MY record, which means I will be unable to chaperone anything!!!
I was NOT the abuser, I was the REPORTER!!!  :-(
To me, that's a serious FLUB-UP!!!

[MixedBag]

good reason to be upset, so get it straightened out and hop all over them.

Remember, everyone works for someone.

[I cry_ in_the_dark]

Aint it wonderful.....They won't return my phone calls!