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Getting the kids back lots of Q"S

Started by care, Mar 29, 2006, 03:48:14 PM

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care

I can give any details you need but i'll keep it short to start.
I am preparing to go back to court to attempt to regain custody of my children 13 & 11.  Last court hearing was ridiculous my ex gained custody of kids even tho he is a convicted felon, with numerous dui's and not even a current dl. I have a clean record, work with hospice and previously worked with board of mrdd caring for children with disabilities. I made a mistake that was the main reason used for this decision, I pulled my boys out of school and filed for a cpo because the boys repeatedly told me they were being abused and I saw a lot of the verbal abuse and saw the same progression in violence that I saw with my ex during our marriage.  I enrolled the boys into another school the same day,  my reasons for the school change were primarily due to the fact that my ex's live in g/f had a child in that school and I was told that he would still be allowed to go to that school to pick up her child and I didn't feel he would follow the order and keep his distance from the boys who were terrified as he knew then that they had told.  We had no custody agreement at that time however his address had been listed as residence that year due to me living outside of that school district. During the court process my attny called no witnesses nor obtained any of the documentation I had to use in my defense and offense. My exes witnesses all had criminal backgrounds but my attny refused to bring this up. In the end I agreed to his being residential parent with 1-2 extra days on alternating weeks, primarily because I had no faith in the attny or the system and simply wanted things to be somewhat normal for the boys.
Now I have grounds for contempt on almost all of the orders the court made and my 13 yr old is wanting to live with me. He is adamant about this and states a lot of abuse, primarily verbal on him more physical on his little brother. I can't prove the abuse, I have been told after the fact by people that they have witnessed physical abuse but they refused to call and report nor agree to speak with cps if I called(my ex has a reputation for fighting and the felony is for an assault where he almost killed a person most people in that town don't want his anger directed at them).  My son knows that if I go back to court he will have to speak to an ad litem again(last time they were too scared to tell what really went on at their dads, the closest they came was to say "he used to hit and kick us and call us names but he doesn't anymore") He has told many people he will tell the ad litem everything because he's tired of it.  
What kind of things can I provide in court that will be helpful when I know in advance that the usual guidelines don't apply. I have a new attny(he used to be prosecuting attny so he knows my ex and these witnesses well) with a better ad litem set up. I have a stable home with my husband(we[ve been married 1yr,together almost 5) and daughter who is doing well in school and behaviourly. My ex is still with g/f and her two children one of which is climbing out windows to run away and causing a lot of problems in school.  I am out of state also but provide all transportation and costs involved and go above and beyond to acquire information about the boys and their lives that my ex refuses to share.
ok way too long I know and I apologize, any help will be greatly appreciated. And a lot of things left unsaid so just ask if you need more on any subject.

wendl

Make sure that if your kids feel they are in danger to call 911.

Also, if they call you scared or whatnot, call the police and ask them to do a child welfare check.

If you pick up the kids and they have bruises etc, take them directly to the hospital for a check up.

Not sure what else to do, post to Soc in paragraphs with the facts so he can help.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**