I can't get any answers.

[haley1818]

My 16 year old son's father sued me for custody 10 months ago. As far as I could tell, my son was doing well in school last Spring.  I was able to check his progress online via the high school's website.
This fall, I could no longer check because the password to access current information was changed.  I wrote the principal two weeks ago requesting the password for my son's progress report and was provided with that.
When I checked the site, I was extremely disturbed to see that my son had been absent from school on "medical leave" since just after Thanksgiving and had not returned after Christmas break.
Because his father gives me no information and in fact won't speak to me, I had no idea what was going on.  I called the school, and was told that there was a note in my son's file which said not to give out any information to anyone.
I called my daughter, but she said she had no idea what had happened.
Finally, against my better judgement, I called my son's father.  His girlfriend answered and refused to put him on.  I called his cell phone the next day and he hung up on me immediately.  I emailed them, asking for information, but received only a reply from their lawyer.
Two days later, a deputy sheriff called me and told me I had no right to know what happened to my son and that a restraining order was in the works against me.
I have no idea where to turn.  I still know nothing about my son's situation with school.  I live in a different state and so am at a disadvantage in getting information.
Any ideas?

[olanna]

Were your parental rights revoked? Did the deputy sheriff give his name and department number? Can you call that to see if it is valid?

The reason I ask that is that this is civil matter. A deputy sheriff would only get involved if this was a criminal matter or to keep the peace.

How far are you from your son? When is the last time you spoke with him? I would suggest making a trip out there and seeing for yourself what it going on.

[haley1818]

No, my parental rights have not been revoked.  The deputy did give his name and badge number, and I have verified that he is employed at the sheriff's office.  
I have recently made the trip to my son's town, where I still own a home.  He will not speak with me, period.  I was unable to see anything since showing up at their house would create an even bigger blow up.  
I appreciate the sentiment of "it's what you do with what is left," but these people are vicious, they have a vicious lawyer, and they are tying my hands.
Incidentally, I have never been arrested and am not a criminal.  I raised three children for a total of 22 years with very little input from their father.  My older son died two years ago, and since then everything has been extremely strange.

[olanna]

My signature has nothing to do with you personally.. ;) Its just a signature.

I have been in your shoes, so I was asking questions to clarify.

[MixedBag]

do you still have joint custody?

[haley1818]

My 16 year old son's father sued me for custody 10 months ago. As far as I could tell, my son was doing well in school last Spring.  I was able to check his progress online via the high school's website.
This fall, I could no longer check because the password to access current information was changed.  I wrote the principal two weeks ago requesting the password for my son's progress report and was provided with that.
When I checked the site, I was extremely disturbed to see that my son had been absent from school on "medical leave" since just after Thanksgiving and had not returned after Christmas break.
Because his father gives me no information and in fact won't speak to me, I had no idea what was going on.  I called the school, and was told that there was a note in my son's file which said not to give out any information to anyone.
I called my daughter, but she said she had no idea what had happened.
Finally, against my better judgement, I called my son's father.  His girlfriend answered and refused to put him on.  I called his cell phone the next day and he hung up on me immediately.  I emailed them, asking for information, but received only a reply from their lawyer.
Two days later, a deputy sheriff called me and told me I had no right to know what happened to my son and that a restraining order was in the works against me.
I have no idea where to turn.  I still know nothing about my son's situation with school.  I live in a different state and so am at a disadvantage in getting information.
Any ideas?

[olanna]

Were your parental rights revoked? Did the deputy sheriff give his name and department number? Can you call that to see if it is valid?

The reason I ask that is that this is civil matter. A deputy sheriff would only get involved if this was a criminal matter or to keep the peace.

How far are you from your son? When is the last time you spoke with him? I would suggest making a trip out there and seeing for yourself what it going on.

[haley1818]

No, my parental rights have not been revoked.  The deputy did give his name and badge number, and I have verified that he is employed at the sheriff's office.  
I have recently made the trip to my son's town, where I still own a home.  He will not speak with me, period.  I was unable to see anything since showing up at their house would create an even bigger blow up.  
I appreciate the sentiment of "it's what you do with what is left," but these people are vicious, they have a vicious lawyer, and they are tying my hands.
Incidentally, I have never been arrested and am not a criminal.  I raised three children for a total of 22 years with very little input from their father.  My older son died two years ago, and since then everything has been extremely strange.

[olanna]

My signature has nothing to do with you personally.. ;) Its just a signature.

I have been in your shoes, so I was asking questions to clarify.

[MixedBag]

do you still have joint custody?