Crazy Mean Ex-Wife - Need Advice

[caninemom]

Hello everyone,

It has been quite a while since I posted to this message board.  Let me tell you my situation.  I am in a second marriage to a man who has two children, a boy and a girl.  They are both nice kids.  The boy is now 20 and therefore no issues remain with him as far as child support and the ex-wife.  The daughter is 17.  About three years ago the ex-wife sued my husband for medical bills she had been stacking up and saving for years.  My husband was at that time responsible for providing health insurance to his children which he had no problem with.  The problem came when his ex-wife attacked us with all these bills she had saved up and which she incurred because she would not use the health insurance in the proper way, i.e., she was supposed to go through a PCP and get referrals.  She did not do that, she just took the kids wherever she felt like.  In court, the judge thankfully saw what she was trying to do and took the responsibility for health insurance away from my husband and put it on her shoulders (her job was brining in roughly $55,000 a year and my husband's only $24,000).   That had all been resolved until now.  Last year the ex-wife was hurt at work and wound up suing the company.  She no longer works there but she got a huge settlment although I do not know nor should I know how much. She told the son something that sounds "fishy" to me that she signed an agreement when she settled stating that she would no longer have health insurance from them and because of that, my husband and I are concerned that she will try to start her psycho stuff again and try to make him carry health insurance on the 17-year-old daughter.  If she can do that, she will run bills up on my husband again and we will be back at the spot we were in during the year 2000.  Does anyone know how this works ??  Is it likely my husband will be responsible for health insurance for his daughter ?  The order says the ex-wife was to provide it but then there has been a change in circumstances with her getting hurt.  She is incidentally so "hurt" that she goes out to the bars with her "husband", gets drunk and plays pool all the time.  Anyway, ANY  help at all will be appreciated.  We live in Ohio.  

Thanks for listening.

Caninemom.

[NoNicky]

The order is the order until it is not.  Another words until she takes it back to court your husband can not be held responsible for medical insurance.  The question of the part not paid by insurance should be covered in the order as well.  That too should remain the same until she takes it back to court and gets a new order.  It might not hurt for you all to take out a secondary policy on the child if you can afford it.  I probably wouldn't tell the ex about the insurance though.  See about having any providers send you a copy of the visit and a copy of the bill for the child.  You may have to write some letters to get this done but it is possible.  Then whenever there is a bill you can submit it to the secondary insurance.  After they have paid you can either apply the money to that bill by paying on it now or put it in a savings account for the day she does come after you again.

NoNicky
For God has not given a spirit of fear; but of power and of love and of a sound mind.  1 Peter 1:6

[KAT]

Some state codes will not allow changes to child support if the youngest child is within 6 months of emancipation. Might be worth looking into.
KAT

(There are castrophonic health insurance available. Some are as low as 25 a month. Large deduct but heck, it's better then nothing especially if serious accident/illness should occur!)

[stepmomtwo1]

Boy your scaring me. I never even thought of the ex taking us back for doctor bills she never gave us. It seems that would be illegal. I mean you can't pay a bill you never knew about.

We have not seen sd in 8 years (her mom is a PAS pro) and we have not gotten a doctor bill in 9 years. She said it is none of our business what happens with sd and she will pay the bills. If she handed them all over at once we would go broke! She's evil too and I could see this happening if she thought it would work and she would get a nice fat check.

[LizaLou1]

Chances are if you took this back to court, they would set a retro timelimit.  At least that's what our attorney tells us.  The key he says is to to keep asking for them in writing to document your good intentions. You might ask Soc for suggestions.  

The nut we deal with has withheld billings for the past year trying to hide psychological counseling for one child and life threatening heart condition for the other.  She takes great pride in telling the childern and others DH refuses to support his family by not paying medical.

Best of Luck

LizaLou

[KAT]

It's called the defense of *LATCHES* "An equitable doctrine used by courts to bar a legal claim or prevent the assertion of a right because of undue delay or failure to assert the claim or right." There is a great deal of case law on this.

We are in the same position, no bills or communication in years.  The only way we know anything is from the EOB's. CS will end in Sept 2005 so we expect any & all bills to be presented to the court then...nice little savings account or so she thinks!  I can tell you right now, the judge will probably only allow 6 months worth if she's not pissed off enough to order NOTHING.

To cover DH ever single time I/We send the medical cards to her, there is a REQUEST to supply all medical bills in a timely manner. In addition the letter states that TO DATE, despite repeated requests there have been NO bills submitted for the past 4 years.  Also add in there that the court requires timely submission of the unpaid medical. "If you disagree with this statement then please respond in writting within 10 days of reciept of this letter so that proper investigation can be made."

KAT